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Old 11-11-2009, 10:28 PM
 
23 posts, read 15,245 times
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I was dating this guy and for various reasons we broke up. We decided to be friends because things really weren't bad, just not what we both needed at the time. Things eventually progressed into friends with benefits. We both accepted that we weren't seeing other people and well it is just good.

Life gets in the way and we don't contact each other for a while. And then out of the blue he calls, we hang out and partake in adult activities. I am totally cool with the friends with benefits. But this is where things get a little shaky. He starts to call more often, and finally I make time to hang out.

The stuff that I am not sure about what message he is sending me is on these factors....he got a little jealous when I started talking about my new friends at school, both male and female. What the heck does that mean. And he likes to kiss. Is kissing allowed with friends with benefits from a guys perspective.

I know what I want as of now from this relationship but I am not so sure that I know what he wants. I like the friends and the benefits are great. I do not want more then that as of right now, but couldn't imagine having the same relationship with others.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:35 PM
 
Location: Pa
33,804 posts, read 19,941,550 times
Reputation: 18015
Quote:
Originally Posted by flamedharma View Post
I was dating this guy and for various reasons we broke up. We decided to be friends because things really weren't bad, just not what we both needed at the time. Things eventually progressed into friends with benefits. We both accepted that we weren't seeing other people and well it is just good.

Life gets in the way and we don't contact each other for a while. And then out of the blue he calls, we hang out and partake in adult activities. I am totally cool with the friends with benefits. But this is where things get a little shaky. He starts to call more often, and finally I make time to hang out.

The stuff that I am not sure about what message he is sending me is on these factors....he got a little jealous when I started talking about my new friends at school, both male and female. What the heck does that mean. And he likes to kiss. Is kissing allowed with friends with benefits from a guys perspective.

I know what I want as of now from this relationship but I am not so sure that I know what he wants. I like the friends and the benefits are great. I do not want more then that as of right now, but couldn't imagine having the same relationship with others.
You are a baaaaad girl. lol. But really he seems confused and don't confuse easy scoring with romance.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:37 PM
 
2,192 posts, read 2,745,470 times
Reputation: 2211
Friends with benefits is a label, nothing more or less. There is no set definition of what you can or can not do and its up for interpretation with said parties involved. I have had friends who tried kissing a prostitute. Does that make sense...no probably not. FWB is really just two people having sex but there is no other real restrictions on it.

Edit: I don't think I could have sex without kissing the woman. I'm too touchy feely and enjoy the passion about it. To me senseless humping is reserved for blow up dolls and porn.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:42 PM
 
Location: Wyoming
6,848 posts, read 9,023,714 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28 View Post
... To me senseless humping is reserved for blow up dolls and porn.
You don't kiss your blow-up doll?

I've really only had one FWB, and we didn't hold back much of anything, certainly not kissing.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:43 PM
 
Location: Pa
33,804 posts, read 19,941,550 times
Reputation: 18015
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28 View Post
Friends with benefits is a label, nothing more or less. There is no set definition of what you can or can not do and its up for interpretation with said parties involved. I have had friends who tried kissing a prostitute. Does that make sense...no probably not. FWB is really just two people having sex but there is no other real restrictions on it.

Edit: I don't think I could have sex without kissing the woman. I'm too touchy feely and enjoy the passion about it. To me senseless humping is reserved for blow up dolls and porn.
Oh hell yeah...my dreams just got better.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:43 PM
 
2,192 posts, read 2,745,470 times
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Originally Posted by WyoNewk View Post
You don't kiss your blow-up doll?
No however, the blow up sheep is an entirely different arrangement.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:45 PM
 
Location: Pa
33,804 posts, read 19,941,550 times
Reputation: 18015
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28 View Post
No however, the blow up sheep is an entirely different arrangement.
Whoah?! hmmm...whatever when in doubt row with the flow.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:46 PM
 
Location: In my skin
8,057 posts, read 9,129,378 times
Reputation: 7928
There is no one way to structure a relationship. You two decide what the rules are. You have established the rules, there is room to evolve, but you have to communicate that. If he wants more, he should just say so. Until then, I wouldn't make any adjustments.

I can't imagine not kissing someone I was intimate with. It is the first thing I look forward to.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:47 PM
 
Location: Wyoming
6,848 posts, read 9,023,714 times
Reputation: 8888
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28 View Post
No however, the blow up sheep is an entirely different arrangement.
A bunch of us in a coffee klatch bought our sheep rancher buddy one of those for his birthday... and of course presented it to him (blown up) in the restaurant.

She was a cute little lamb.
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Old 11-11-2009, 10:50 PM
 
2,192 posts, read 2,745,470 times
Reputation: 2211
Quote:
Originally Posted by PassTheChocolate View Post
I can't imagine not kissing someone I was intimate with. It is the first thing I look forward to.
I'm kind of the same way. I love kissing and other things I won't mention that are very intimate. I just can't see skimping on that when having sex.
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