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She excluded information, she didn't bring everything into play.
There are no mind readers here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jinglebell
The closest thing I can remember is that when I was in graduate school, everybody in the department got a "mail". I am sure the reaction among the whole department is not homogeneous. We all have our own head over our own shoulders.
I don't expect everybody will react the same to the OP either.
Let go is not mutually exclusive from another proper reaction.
If there is illegal act involved, she should report to police immediately.
If his act is not ethic, she can pursue sources other than law authority too.
As I said, we are all different. Some may just choose let go, some may choose a combo of let go and a "mail"....
Most importantly, she need to find peace within. Not a war to declare to anybody including yourself.
I am so sorry this guy mistreated you. You are right, abusers can be really charming, conniving, and narcissistic. They also seem to get away with their misdeeds. It'd be nice to be able to hurt them as they've hurt us, but that's not usually possible because they have a distinct advantage - they're evil. You'll always be at a disadvantage against a truly evil person/sociopath. I choose to believe that eventually they will get what they deserve. It'd be nice to witness this act of karma, but we often don't get that opportunity. Donate his goods to charity, put him and everything he's done to you in the past, chalk this up to a lesson learned, pick yourself up, and get on with your life. You can definitely do better than this. and when you find happiness, he'll still be the same creep he's always been. Living a good life and being happy is the best revenge. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I am so sorry this guy mistreated you. You are right, abusers can be really charming, conniving, and narcissistic. They also seem to get away with their misdeeds. It'd be nice to be able to hurt them as they've hurt us, but that's not usually possible because they have a distinct advantage - they're evil. You'll always be at a disadvantage against a truly evil person/sociopath. I choose to believe that eventually they will get what they deserve. It'd be nice to witness this act of karma, but we often don't get that opportunity. Donate his goods to charity, put him and everything he's done to you in the past, chalk this up to a lesson learned, pick yourself up, and get on with your life. You can definitely do better than this. and when you find happiness, he'll still be the same creep he's always been. Living a good life and being happy is the best revenge. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Unknowingly, the guy is punished day in and day out. For me, I would put an abusive, lying, narcissistic user on the level of a child molestor.
Going through life as a fraud has got to be hell anyway.
Unknowingly, the guy is punished day in and day out. For me, I would put an abusive, lying, narcissistic user on the level of a child molestor.
Going through life as a fraud has got to be hell anyway.
I think the biggest hell of all has to be carrying around the pic of a beautiful 6 year old girl, your own flesh and blood, who is flawless and the picture of himself (in his words, and I've seen a pic of her and she IS precious) knowing she is not in your life. I don't get how a man can live with that. It's a whole other topic for another thread, but I don't understand it. This is part of why I think he is so warped.
This is part of what I've never understood. He goes through life with accolades for searching those out on riverbeds, and yet denies his daughter.
Well, I've never had it in me to say this to him before, but I just may.
Sociopaths sleep like babies, no second thought on their part.
Yeah, but you would think it would eat at them inside, some way. Idk, my sisters fiance is an emotionally abusive sociopath, maybe I should ask him how it's going?
He also carries around pictures of his baby daughter yet refuses any of the responsibility it takes to raise a healthy child. But he sure lets people think he does.
Yeah, but you would think it would eat at them inside, some way. Idk, my sisters fiance is an emotionally abusive sociopath, maybe I should ask him how it's going?
No, think all the notorious sociopaths, the only regret they have is they were caught.
I think the biggest hell of all has to be carrying around the pic of a beautiful 6 year old girl, your own flesh and blood, who is flawless and the picture of himself (in his words, and I've seen a pic of her and she IS precious) knowing she is not in your life. I don't get how a man can live with that. It's a whole other topic for another thread, but I don't understand it.
It would be hell for you, or for any ordinary person, but not for the sociopath. You'd think they'd suffer over something like that, but they don't. And if not being near their own child can't hurt them ... well, nothing will.
My ex-brother-in-law is that way. He has a son, my nephew, who is five now. He hasn't seen his son since he was just a couple of months old and has never made any move to see him or speak to him. He'll threaten to take him away from my sister-in-law when he manages to get her phone number, but it's only to punish her for leaving. He never asks how his son is--seriously, not once--just says things like, "Wait until he comes to live with me. Then you'll owe me child support and I'll teach him what a **** you are. I'll make sure he hates you. Just wait." Every now and then he'll accuse her of cheating on him and trying to snare him for child support, despite my nephew's being the spitting image of him.
I'm telling you, you can't hurt people like my ex-brother-in-law. They have no soul. Their minds warp anything you say to them so it's always your fault ... you're wrong ... you're crazy. They are delusional.
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