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Old 11-27-2009, 05:56 AM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,357,275 times
Reputation: 8075

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Quote:
Originally Posted by whitleybaby View Post
My girlfriend just told me that she's 6 weeks pregnant.
Should i propose to her ?
I have doubts because marriage is a huge step and divorce isn't something i want
We've been best friends for 3 years and started dating about 6 months ago
I love her and it's been really amazing but marriage is a huge step
If you were me ,what would you do ?
In my opinion, you definitely should propose. You didn't think about pregnancy and marriage when you were having unprotected sex, did you? Time to step up and face the consequences. You are not 16 for crying out loud.
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Old 11-27-2009, 06:41 AM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,972,596 times
Reputation: 20084
I'm a girl... I would not want you to propose. I'm sure I have a different background and different beliefs from your girlfriend, but I would feel like you were marrying me just because of the baby.

I say that if you are really keen on this girl, you can wait. Marry her later on down the road - whenever that may be. Getting baby news is a big deal already. Give your brain some time to process it all and then move on to the next big decision.
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Old 11-27-2009, 06:51 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 14,623,536 times
Reputation: 3784
Quote:
Originally Posted by whitleybaby View Post
My girlfriend just told me that she's 6 weeks pregnant.
Should i propose to her ?
I have doubts because marriage is a huge step and divorce isn't something i want
We've been best friends for 3 years and started dating about 6 months ago
I love her and it's been really amazing but marriage is a huge step
If you were me ,what would you do ?

Sorry for what I'm about to say... so marriage is a huge step but using a condom and risking pregnancy was ok?? If you make your bed, you have to lie in it. Period. Good luck.
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Old 11-27-2009, 07:20 AM
 
672 posts, read 2,109,349 times
Reputation: 1178
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
Sorry for what I'm about to say... so marriage is a huge step but using a condom and risking pregnancy was ok?? If you make your bed, you have to lie in it. Period. Good luck.
Just because one mistake was made (sex resulting in the unintended pregnancy), doesn't mean another mistake should be made (marriage only b/c of the pregnancy)!

Last edited by Mary Ann789; 11-27-2009 at 07:22 AM.. Reason: clarification
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Old 11-27-2009, 07:26 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 14,623,536 times
Reputation: 3784
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Ann789 View Post
Just because one mistake was made (sex resulting in the unintended pregnancy), doesn't mean another mistake should be made (marriage only b/c of the pregnancy)!
But that's my point. If they weren't planning on getting married pre-pregnancy and now they are being "forced' into it because someone has a guily conscience, then they are only going to end up in divorce and another child is going to grow up in a split household. I just wish people would think and see the bigger picture before they take their actions....
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Old 11-27-2009, 07:34 AM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
50,170 posts, read 63,623,198 times
Reputation: 92905
You're 38 and you knocked up a 24 year old? Grow up and accept your responsibility. I would have thought that at your age you would know what causes pregnancy. Your happiness now is secondary to your child's security and well being. Your child doesn't care if you're scared of getting a divorce. Man up.
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Old 11-27-2009, 07:52 AM
 
Location: Falls Church, VA
748 posts, read 1,312,078 times
Reputation: 429
Quote:
Originally Posted by whitleybaby View Post
My girlfriend just told me that she's 6 weeks pregnant.
Should i propose to her ?
I have doubts because marriage is a huge step and divorce isn't something i want
We've been best friends for 3 years and started dating about 6 months ago
I love her and it's been really amazing but marriage is a huge step
If you were me ,what would you do ?
You are quite correct marriage is a HUGE step. There is nothing that says you must marry the mother of your child, you MUST however take care and support the baby. It is a great responsibility, and what ever you decide I wish you luck
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Old 11-27-2009, 08:53 AM
 
Location: SoCal - Sherman Oaks & Woodland Hills
12,974 posts, read 33,896,044 times
Reputation: 10491
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheCaliforniaBear View Post
How about an abortion?
BEST ANSWER YET!!!

Have an abortion and problem solved.
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Old 11-27-2009, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 14,623,536 times
Reputation: 3784
Abortion would be the easy way out, but it's not a form of birth control. I don't condone it unless a woman knows she's having severly handicapped or worse child, and I don't condone it unless a woman is raped.
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Old 11-27-2009, 09:12 AM
 
Location: SoCal - Sherman Oaks & Woodland Hills
12,974 posts, read 33,896,044 times
Reputation: 10491
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
Abortion would be the easy way out, but it's not a form of birth control. I don't condone it unless a woman knows she's having severly handicapped or worse child, and I don't condone it unless a woman is raped.
Luckily it itsnt up to you. I know its a touchy subject with many people (usually the overly religious types) but its great to have as an option.

I think the girlfriend would be stupid to have the baby. Just what the world needs is another single mom having a baby out of wedlock. I am also confused about the entire situation. Usually, a 24 year old woman who is dating a 38 year old man is doing it because the man is smarter and probably has a bit of money. However, in this case Im not so sure since the 38 year old man has to go on a forum to ask "what should I do?". This leads me to believe he's not as established and/or as educated as one should be at 38.

Then again, if the 24 year old doesnt have much going on in her life (lacks an education and steady employment) she could be using this baby as a means to get financial support.

Bottom line and lesson for all - if your not married and do not want a baby, use a condom (guy) and birth control (gal). If it doesnt work, have an abortion. Otherwise, prepare for a life of raising a child and having the other parent around and involved in your life FOREVER.
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