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What is the deal with that? Seriously! I understand if there are kids involved to the level of going to events for kids but beyond that...?
I mean is it really that hard to make NEW friends that you have not slept with yet or what? There are tons of people out there yet people have to go hang out with an ex and act like its nothing?
Because there are still feelings there. Period, point blank, end of story. That's the only reason why I used to hang out with my Ex's.
What is the deal with that? Seriously! I understand if there are kids involved to the level of going to events for kids but beyond that...?
I mean is it really that hard to make NEW friends that you have not slept with yet or what? There are tons of people out there yet people have to go hang out with an ex and act like its nothing?
That is a huge NO NO in my book. There will be ZERO hanging out with an ex no matter what the situation is. I dont do it, wouldnt do it, and I would expect that whoever I am with will not do it either.
Well you are spending time with them or on them that you could be spending on hunting a new one or personal development. Its not about wishing you wanted to be with the ex. I think about all the times of just being out and seeing people want to talk to me but then they look at who I am standing with and look disappointed. LOL
Now if it was the ex and I was single, I could of just missed out on the new one. I have just met people in so many strange ways that you would never thing would turn out to be a LTR (friends and love) so I just don't want to miss a chance piddling in the past.
I get ya, though being friends with an ex is not necessarily piddling in the past or not wanting to let go of it. The relationship itself is in the past, the friendship remains.
Simply sitting with someone of the opposite sex can have the same effect. You wouldn't have to have had a relationship or slept with him in order for someone to assume you are attached. Does this mean you should avoid every friend of the opposite sex in public? Seems a bit excessive.
The point is that you have complete control over your love life. If you are available, people will know that. Heck, even if you're not available, they will still show an interest. I have yet to have a friend, ex or not, prevent anyone from showing an interest in me. As for those who got away, I never knew they existed so I'm not missing out on anything. There are plenty more where they came from.
That is a huge NO NO in my book. There will be ZERO hanging out with an ex no matter what the situation is. I dont do it, wouldnt do it, and I would expect that whoever I am with will not do it either.
I get ya, though being friends with an ex is not necessarily piddling in the past or not wanting to let go of it. The relationship itself is in the past, the friendship remains.
Simply sitting with someone of the opposite sex can have the same effect. You wouldn't have to have had a relationship or slept with him in order for someone to assume you are attached. Does this mean you should avoid every friend of the opposite sex in public? Seems a bit excessive.
The point is that you have complete control over your love life. If you are available, people will know that. Heck, even if you're not available, they will still show an interest. I have yet to have a friend, ex or not, prevent anyone from showing an interest in me. As for those who got away, I never knew they existed so I'm not missing out on anything. There are plenty more where they came from.
Most of my ex's are over 6ft and 200 lbs...Try getting the opposite sex's attention when you are in the company of that or the biggest ex of 7'3'' 250+ lbs in a leather jacket. People don't even stay looking at me when I would hang out with him. It was so funny.
Guys do not hit on girls that are standing with guys. Its an insult to the guy. Maybe trashy dudes do it. But I see the "nice guys" wilt at it. So I would have to pass up a nice guy but catch a player easily?
People lie to themselves in this situation a lot too. Thats what makes it so crazy. You may think you never would...But being in LTR it does go in cycles of hot or not. So who is to say that is not going to spring back into your platonic relationship?
Most of my ex's are over 6ft and 200 lbs...Try getting the opposite sex's attention when you are in the company of that or the biggest ex of 7'3'' 250+ lbs in a leather jacket. People don't even stay looking at me when I would hang out with him. It was so funny.
Guys do not hit on girls that are standing with guys. Its an insult to the guy. Maybe trashy dudes do it. But I see the "nice guys" wilt at it. So I would have to pass up a nice guy but catch a player easily?
Good grief! Huge!
Eye contact, body language, a passing "hello", striking up conversation - all ways to convey that you are not taken. It would be a lot more difficult for me since I don't hit on men. But, I do talk to everyone and when I want to make it clear I am available, I'll find a way to get that message across.
To each their own, but, where there is a will, there is a way.
People lie to themselves in this situation a lot too. Thats what makes it so crazy. You may think you never would...But being in LTR it does go in cycles of hot or not. So who is to say that is not going to spring back into your platonic relationship?
People do, sure, but to project your own feelings onto every situation isn't productive. That alone can limit your chances of being with someone worthwhile.
I tend to think more logically than emotively. If I am still not over them and I know there is no future in it, I will stay away until I am. If we both feel there is a good basis for friendship down the road, I'm all for it. There are exes I have no desire to be around because they don't add to my life in any way. So, it is safe to say that if I am friends with an ex, there is nothing more to it than that.
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