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Old 12-07-2009, 02:13 PM
 
25,170 posts, read 32,358,536 times
Reputation: 6671
Wear a polonaise hoop-skirt.
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Old 12-08-2009, 03:10 PM
 
Location: Kurdistan Sine
152 posts, read 43,681 times
Reputation: 34
Congratulations
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Old 12-18-2009, 09:01 AM
 
Location: GA
1,033 posts, read 778,164 times
Reputation: 984
Congrats! Happy for you and I wish you love and happiness for life.
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Old 12-21-2009, 07:56 PM
 
Location: FL
2,392 posts, read 3,113,147 times
Reputation: 1224
I'm late to this party but congrats JG. Its good that you were able to see your way back to him. Your story has given me some hope b/c it is similar to the thing that I'm going through right now with an uphill climb to let her know that I love her deeply that seems to be as tough as climbing Camelback Mountain.
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Old 12-21-2009, 10:48 PM
 
Location: MN
314 posts, read 451,013 times
Reputation: 331
Congratulations-enjoy the future
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Old 12-22-2009, 02:26 AM
 
Location: Florida
7,250 posts, read 6,284,681 times
Reputation: 5905
Quote:
Originally Posted by diako_lorddm View Post
Congratulations
Quote:
Originally Posted by hatgirl007 View Post
Congrats! Happy for you and I wish you love and happiness for life.
Thank you! You too!! Merry Christmas!

Quote:
Originally Posted by he's so hott View Post
I'm late to this party but congrats JG. Its good that you were able to see your way back to him. Your story has given me some hope b/c it is similar to the thing that I'm going through right now with an uphill climb to let her know that I love her deeply that seems to be as tough as climbing Camelback Mountain.
Thanks, He's so! Since you are in a similar situation, I will give some more input if you don't mind based on what we went through. Hopefully it can be of some help to you from at least my standpoint.

I say as long as you are not writing her those long, drawn out, bare-your-soul 'woe is me' from past to present sort of letters coming off as a worm, I feel positive that you stand a good chance, without knowing your situation exactly. Hell froze over on my end, anything is possible.

I was pretty hard-shelled and iced over toward him - it felt like indifference through most of it, (other times, just completely annoyed, I was like "WTF is WRONG with this guy?!"). I seriously began to wonder if he was off, I could not ignore the fact that what he was doing was a close relative to stalking [without making me feel threatened] - but he remained calm, patient, loving, consistent and did not whine - nor did he have any incidents of anger or lashing outs. Each email was typically kept at 1-3 lines (nudges) just saying what he had to say w/o trying to provoke a response out of me. He did not get dramatic. That is what pulled him through in the end and got my attention again - he remained well mannered and gentlemanly. He did not act psychotic, manipulate, act or say weird things. See, while I was dating another/others [over 16 months] and they got loop-loop, uninteresting, undependable and/or somewhat weird on me [etc.] ---HE started to look better and better in my eyes, he was proving his solidity [hard to explain, but you know what I mean]. . . My Fiance is not an ugly, socially retarded dweeb, this is a man who certainly can and has gotten better/prettier/smarter, etc. I was perplexed why he wasn't. My insecurities. I would've always thought this sort of pursuit would have been done by a desperate man. A new lesson about love for me.

After about the 400th or so email/text (no joke, again, they were very short and nice, but not overly puke-puke), and after whatever amount of calls per week (he wouldn't leave a voice mail), I began to wonder in the end when I reflected upon the situation how nuts *I* was for ignoring someone with such a passion. I had to take another look, but closer. When I decided to talk with him, not once did he ever say, "How come you did that to me," or mention anything about it. Today, he will briefly tell me here and there how heart-wrenched it made him - nothing over the top. . he will mention it subtly within an endearment, which is now nice since I am receptive and will be his wife. I have asked him a couple of times how and why he did it and how he maintained his composure, his answer, "Because you're very special and I really love you." - Okies! Works for me!

I'm now a believer that when any man applies himself while maintaining his patience, dignity and self respect [AND respecting her], the woman you love can absolutely be brought back. I'm still in a whirlwind how it all came together - so is he. I won't take it for granted, that is the difference today. I actually answer his calls now.

Good luck and Merry Christmas! Buckle down your mind for a long climb like he did and I believe anything is possible. After all, Camelback has been climbed many times! Right!


Quote:
Originally Posted by future1 View Post
Congratulations-enjoy the future
Enjoy the future, lol - that's cute. Thanks, Future! Merry Christmas!

Last edited by JeepGirl118; 12-22-2009 at 03:46 AM.. Reason: Typo galore
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Old 12-22-2009, 03:06 AM
 
11,001 posts, read 6,598,519 times
Reputation: 8234
Great post Jeep. I think a lot of people need to know exactly how they should try to get an ex back, because a lot of us (me included) have never done things the right way. Well, I'm not trying anymore, but I know that if the day comes, I will do what you say about keeping one's composure. That is indeed important.

Congratulations on getting a man who loves you and respects you as you deserve. I am positive you would have never settled for anything less. As would never have I.
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Old 12-22-2009, 09:38 AM
 
Location: FL
2,392 posts, read 3,113,147 times
Reputation: 1224
Quote:
Originally Posted by JeepGirl118 View Post
Thank you! You too!! Merry Christmas!

Thanks, He's so! Since you are in a similar situation, I will give some more input if you don't mind based on what we went through. Hopefully it can be of some help to you from at least my standpoint.

I say as long as you are not writing her those long, drawn out, bare-your-soul 'woe is me' from past to present sort of letters coming off as a worm, I feel positive that you stand a good chance, without knowing your situation exactly. Hell froze over on my end, anything is possible.

I was pretty hard-shelled and iced over toward him - it felt like indifference through most of it, (other times, just completely annoyed, I was like "WTF is WRONG with this guy?!"). I seriously began to wonder if he was off, I could not ignore the fact that what he was doing was a close relative to stalking [without making me feel threatened] - but he remained calm, patient, loving, consistent and did not whine - nor did he have any incidents of anger or lashing outs. Each email was typically kept at 1-3 lines (nudges) just saying what he had to say w/o trying to provoke a response out of me. He did not get dramatic. That is what pulled him through in the end and got my attention again - he remained well mannered and gentlemanly. He did not act psychotic, manipulate, act or say weird things. See, while I was dating another/others [over 16 months] and they got loop-loop, uninteresting, undependable and/or somewhat weird on me [etc.] ---HE started to look better and better in my eyes, he was proving his solidity [hard to explain, but you know what I mean]. . . My Fiance is not an ugly, socially retarded dweeb, this is a man who certainly can and has gotten better/prettier/smarter, etc. I was perplexed why he wasn't. My insecurities. I would've always thought this sort of pursuit would have been done by a desperate man. A new lesson about love for me.

After about the 400th or so email/text (no joke, again, they were very short and nice, but not overly puke-puke), and after whatever amount of calls per week (he wouldn't leave a voice mail), I began to wonder in the end when I reflected upon the situation how nuts *I* was for ignoring someone with such a passion. I had to take another look, but closer. When I decided to talk with him, not once did he ever say, "How come you did that to me," or mention anything about it. Today, he will briefly tell me here and there how heart-wrenched it made him - nothing over the top. . he will mention it subtly within an endearment, which is now nice since I am receptive and will be his wife. I have asked him a couple of times how and why he did it and how he maintained his composure, his answer, "Because you're very special and I really love you." - Okies! Works for me!

I'm now a believer that when any man applies himself while maintaining his patience, dignity and self respect [AND respecting her], the woman you love can absolutely be brought back. I'm still in a whirlwind how it all came together - so is he. I won't take it for granted, that is the difference today. I actually answer his calls now.

Good luck and Merry Christmas! Buckle down your mind for a long climb like he did and I believe anything is possible. After all, Camelback has been climbed many times! Right!
The more you write about your actions toward him the more they remind me of hers towards me. I see my actions as strategy. I want her to at some point ask if she is crazy for ignoring a great guy. My emails and txts are to as you said above, make her ask if this guy is crazy. And not b/c I keep emailing and txting with no response from her; but b/c I never am angry or weird in the communications; just letting her know about a awesome job offer I just got which is a promotion or my recent trip to Europe; just normal everyday stuff you would talk about with a friend. However, I still express my interest in her and always wishing her well with one or two lines.

Def not writing the long love letters. Did it once right after the initial breakup. The emails/txt that I do send are once a month and I try to keep them short and sweet. And when I do call I don't leave a message.

Thanks again. I know that I have to stay buckled down, patient, calm and mature especially with her only being 28 and me being 4 years older I have to respect the lack of maturation from her and just stay focused. I know that its going to be a long climb but I wish that it was South Mountain instead of Camelback, but the views are spectacular once you reach the top so it's worth it.
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Old 12-22-2009, 02:07 PM
 
Location: Florida
7,250 posts, read 6,284,681 times
Reputation: 5905
Quote:
Originally Posted by he's so hott View Post
The more you write about your actions toward him the more they remind me of hers towards me. I see my actions as strategy. I want her to at some point ask if she is crazy for ignoring a great guy. My emails and txts are to as you said above, make her ask if this guy is crazy. And not b/c I keep emailing and txting with no response from her; but b/c I never am angry or weird in the communications; just letting her know about a awesome job offer I just got which is a promotion or my recent trip to Europe; just normal everyday stuff you would talk about with a friend. However, I still express my interest in her and always wishing her well with one or two lines.

Def not writing the long love letters. Did it once right after the initial breakup. The emails/txt that I do send are once a month and I try to keep them short and sweet. And when I do call I don't leave a message.

Thanks again. I know that I have to stay buckled down, patient, calm and mature especially with her only being 28 and me being 4 years older I have to respect the lack of maturation from her and just stay focused. I know that its going to be a long climb but I wish that it was South Mountain instead of Camelback, but the views are spectacular once you reach the top so it's worth it.
Sounds like you are on your way and have your head on right. You definitely know what you are doing! Keep me posted on how it goes, interested to learn the end result, despite the fact it can take months upon months. Let me know!
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Old 12-22-2009, 02:09 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
6,766 posts, read 7,232,645 times
Reputation: 6288
Where's that ring woman?

I wanna seeeeeeeeee!
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