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Because of my career I'd be hesitant to marry someone with a serious criminal record (security clearances and such).
It would of course depend on what the crime was, why they did it, how far back in the past, and most importantly, where that person is in life now.
While I can appreciate that people need second chances, I know there are plenty of valid reasons to be skeptical of dating a felon.
-Most criminals are impulsive in nature. Unless they have demonstrated an ability to control that, they will be impulsive in all areas of live, even if they now live a clean life.
-Your reputation is at stake! For better or worst, people judge you by the company that you keep.
-Depending on what the crime was, there can be some unpleasant ramifications that you would have to live with as a spouse. For example, sex offenders...have fun finding a place to live together.
You cannot find someone without. Maybe you need to look at youself first and see what really makes you happy. You need to get out of thinking that they will change. They are what they are. Live the right way and make yourself better.
I've always been semi-curious as to what people thought about dating someone with a criminal background. I'm not talking about traffic citations.
So, what say ye about dating someone with a criminal background -
Do you care?
Do you draw a line at certain crimes?
Does it make a difference if it was 2 years ago versus 10 years ago?
Make a difference if charges were filed but they weren't found guilty?
ETA: This is assuming you know about the criminal record and recognizing that people commit crimes, don't get caught and don't have a formal record.
There are so many variables and factors to consider.
1. By "Dating" do you mean: A - dating for possible long term relationship like marriage?; B - dating for exclusive relationship? or C - dating as in just looking to bone the chick and nothing else? I would consider criminal background chicks for "C" group only, but not groups A or B.
2. What do you mean by criminal background? Are they felons? I would NOT ever date a woman who is a felon under any circumstances. But I'd probably still "do her" if the situation is right, but she will never EVER EVER be my girlfriend. I would never under ANY circumstances ever ever ever date a woman with any background of violent crimes be they misdemeanors or other. Assaults, vandalism, etc. would disqualify her from being able to date me. Would also NOT date her or have sex with her if she has criminal background in drugs, stolen property, warrants for unpaid tickets, etc.
Ethics and virtues are important to me when actually considering someone to DATE. Women with criminal record just fail to qualify. But, if the situation was right, and the woman is very attractive, I would possibly still "do her" but not date her - like Paris Hilton who has a criminal record.
Big concern. I would prefer not to.
If I did meet someone who had put that life/lifestyle behind them then possibly but I better have a whole lot of love for you.
It does depend on the crime as well :Child Mlstn, Incest, Rape, etc would be big concerns. Now if it was drug conviction that also would worry me that a person who lived that lifestyle of big money, cars,and clothes is addicted to the life. I would wonder in hard times would be revert back to making that "easy money" and take the risk of being locked up. Maybe you double crossed someone to get a deal and I don't want to be chillin with you in the house when payback arrives.
**Plus when you spend years in jail, all dude's say they weren't the one who didn't switch teams but hey there are some serious questionmarks on your sexuality. I would prefer a man who hasn't been turned out but doesn't consider himself gay,etc.
I've always been semi-curious as to what people thought about dating someone with a criminal background. I'm not talking about traffic citations.
So, what say ye about dating someone with a criminal background -
Do you care?
Do you draw a line at certain crimes?
Does it make a difference if it was 2 years ago versus 10 years ago?
Make a difference if charges were filed but they weren't found guilty?
ETA: This is assuming you know about the criminal record and recognizing that people commit crimes, don't get caught and don't have a formal record.
I've been tempted to start a new thread to cover the "once a- always a-?" topics in general, but since I don't get many responses to my threads I'll add it in here...
whether a person committed crimes, was a wife-beater, cheater, or whatever, I've found the relevant point is how the individual looks back on those actions now...
in other words, if he laughs it off like it was no big deal, or lies about it, or tries to cover his actions by blaming someone else, those are signs that he didn't learn anything and is no different now than when he did those things.
on the other hand, if he takes full responsibility for his actions, along the line of acknowledging that he did something wrong, regrets it, tried to set it right, etc., that's a person who learned from his mistakes.
Well, anyone can change. I had a few scrapes with the law due to youthful indiscretion myself. Your question cannot be answered in any accurate way; every case is different. Who can judge. Some guys are career criminals while others truly mend their ways and become good citizens.
That being said, tread into this relationship forwarned. And yeah, I know, I learned a long time ago that most women--despite what they say--are turned on by Bad Boys. I was one myself and so I know from first hand experience. No brag, just fact.
Good luck.
That being said, tread into this relationship forwarned. And yeah, I know, I learned a long time ago that most women--despite what they say--are turned on by Bad Boys. I was one myself and so I know from first hand experience. No brag, just fact.
Good luck.
LOL As I posted earlier in this thread, I'm just asking the question in general, not entering into a relationship or anything like that.
Thanks, though, for your input
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