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Here is my 3 step program to fix a rough spot in a marriage.
OK. You screwed up. You forgot to pay the mortgage, didn't take the cat to the vet, backed the car in the garage door and didn't say thank you to your mother in law who just gave you a scented candle for your birthday.
1. Of course you don't put up with silly drama but you actually do need to fix real screw ups. Give an apology and add prompt performance to fix the problem.
2. The next day she is still angry. After all you are just back even and what did she get out of it? Get her some flowers and a nice card and be especially willing to help out with some chore.
3. She is probably near the point where she might start to be concerned you are a little sappy. Come home and and go into the kitchen, and if she bothers you tell her you are busy. If she persists tell her to remain silent, and that you are making dinner. You of course made an exquisite version of her favorite dish. When you eat dinner with her, look at her like a lecherous wolf and then make good on it at the end of the evening.
The "communication" deal is quite nicely communicated here:
2. Your partner sees reality, but doesn’t care. You can communicate until you’re blue in the face, but if your partner doesn’t care how you feel or whether the relationship is healthy, then your marriage may be over. Marriage coach Mort Fertel says, “Ironically, communication techniques sometimes give people clarity that they don’t care what their spouse thinks or feels. They “got it,” but “it” doesn’t matter to them anymore.” Communication is secondary to caring.
Here is my 3 step program to fix a rough spot in a marriage.
OK. You screwed up. You forgot to pay the mortgage, didn't take the cat to the vet, backed the car in the garage door and didn't say thank you to your mother in law who just gave you a scented candle for your birthday.
1. Of course you don't put up with silly drama but you actually do need to fix real screw ups. Give an apology and add prompt performance to fix the problem.
2. The next day she is still angry. After all you are just back even and what did she get out of it? Get her some flowers and a nice card and be especially willing to help out with some chore.
3. She is probably near the point where she might start to be concerned you are a little sappy. Come home and and go into the kitchen and if she bothers you tell her you are busy. If she persists tell her to remain silent and that you are making dinner. You of course made an exquisite version of her favorite dish. When you eat dinner with her look at her like a lecherous wolf and then make good on it at the end of the evening.
Men feel trapped by marriage and kids. They get fed up of always having someone to tell them what they should and shouldn't do.
Of course logic is a reason marriages fail for men...once they see how illogical it is to even get married these days.
I believe EVERYONE does not like someone telling them what they should and shouldn't do. The only people I can imagine who would enjoy that are those who are weak mentally and can't handle the responsibility of being in charge of their lives.
I don't think any marriage should consist of one person telling the other what they can/can't do. Now, this IS where communication comes into place, and not just in simply expressing XYZ, but also in resolving whatever seems to be the current issue so that neither party is pushed aside. Compromise, people.
Here is my 3 step program to fix a rough spot in a marriage.
OK. You screwed up. You forgot to pay the mortgage, didn't take the cat to the vet, backed the car in the garage door and didn't say thank you to your mother in law who just gave you a scented candle for your birthday.
1. Of course you don't put up with silly drama but you actually do need to fix real screw ups. Give an apology and add prompt performance to fix the problem.
2. The next day she is still angry. After all you are just back even and what did she get out of it? Get her some flowers and a nice card and be especially willing to help out with some chore.
3. She is probably near the point where she might start to be concerned you are a little sappy. Come home and and go into the kitchen, and if she bothers you tell her you are busy. If she persists tell her to remain silent, and that you are making dinner. You of course made an exquisite version of her favorite dish. When you eat dinner with her, look at her like a lecherous wolf and then make good on it at the end of the evening.
I've read that money and arguments over money are the biggest problems in relationships and the main reasons for divorce.
Yea, I read that too and I believe it to be true. But SierraAz is right in that it's an underlying issue to the situation because money or no money if you REALLY love somebody your not going to go anywhere..
So if anything, money helps PROLONG a relationship were as, if you're poor you tend not to put up with things because, in a way, your not being compensated for the extra hassle.
OK, got maybe more than halfway through the article before I was too nauseous to continue. I mean, REALLY?!
This poor ******* actually felt he needed to embarrass himself to show he's tamping down his "ego" to make her happy???? And THEN, he had to prop open his "vulnerability" and spill his guts and emotions????
YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why on EARTH would I (or any non-controlling, SANE woman) want a man to act like THAT?! If I wanted to live with someone who was vulnerable, eager to show weakness and emoting all over the place, I'd move in with a GAY guy or another WOMAN!!!!
Nope, sorry, but I like my men to make me feel like they've got the world under control; I like a bit of swagger; I want to feel safe around them, not worried that they're going to cry or emote all over me. In short, I don't want my man acting like a hairy, flat-chested WOMAN!
I thought this article would be helpful for men. Btw, to those of you who complain about lack of sex - most of the time it's not about your wife's lack of desire; it's all about her resentment for various reasons. Women don't feel like making love when they feel unloved!
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