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Old 12-13-2009, 09:22 PM
 
210 posts, read 628,609 times
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I was looking at Donna Hanover's book, My Boyfriend's Back: 50 True Stories of Reconnecting with a Long-Lost Love, which is the story of getting back with her high school sweetheart after more than 20 years. Reading a few of the stories made me wonder how common this is.

I recently heard from my college sweetheart, from 20 years ago. Although we only talked on the phone, the feelings are still there...

Has this ever happened to any of you? What became of it?
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Old 12-13-2009, 09:29 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,095 posts, read 56,964,608 times
Reputation: 38293
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mentat View Post
I was looking at Donna Hanover's book, My Boyfriend's Back: 50 True Stories of Reconnecting with a Long-Lost Love, which is the story of getting back with her high school sweetheart after more than 20 years. Reading a few of the stories made me wonder how common this is.

I recently heard from my college sweetheart, from 20 years ago. Although we only talked on the phone, the feelings are still there...

Has this ever happened to any of you? What became of it?
I hope neither of you is married!!

Research is showing that long lost loves like this are POWERFUL things. Once you stir up old feelings they can be hard to get back under control.

One psychologist whose done research on this subject for about 15 year is Dr. Nancy Kalish - her book "Lost and Found Lovers" was the beginning of her research, you might want to check it out.
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Old 12-13-2009, 09:31 PM
 
Location: somewhere south of Canada
2,144 posts, read 2,585,866 times
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Yup. Found my high school boyfriend on Facebook, sent a message, turned out he was just getting out of a bad relationship and I was single. We had dinner three days later and it ended up in a five month, long distance relationship.

It ended, but not in a bad way. It turned out there were too many "deal-breakers" to overlook, but we stayed friends.
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:24 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
2,383 posts, read 4,108,016 times
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My mom did this! When she was 18, she dated a professor at the college she attended. They had a 2 year relationship that obviously ended. They kept in touch over the years but both went on to marry other people. Then, about 10 years ago, they found each other again, both were single and they are now happily married! Worked out well for them!
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:34 PM
 
Location: somewhere south of Canada
2,144 posts, read 2,585,866 times
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This also happened with an ex's Dad. His high school sweetheart contacted him after her husband died, they corresponded for a few months and then he asked her to marry him. Trouble was, he was still married to my ex's Mom at the time 35 years of marriage down the drain so he could be with his HS love.

That was about 7 or 8 years ago, and last I heard, Dad and the "HS homewrecker" were still married, living in the house he'd shared with my ex's Mom for 35 years. My ex's Mom is barely making ends meet because she was the one who had to move and buy a new place to live without any support from him, and she doesn't make very much money. I bet she wishes she knew all the fancy high powered lawyers so many men on this forum seem to be familiar with, 'cause somehow she didn't end up rolling in dough after the divorce.
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:35 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,095 posts, read 56,964,608 times
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My sister and her husband were high school sweethearts. She was young and wild and broke his heart. He was 3 years older, more serious and wanted to go to med school. He went off to college and eventually married someone from school. She did the same. Over the years members of each of our families would run into one another and word would always get back to one that the other had asked about them, but they never ran into each other

Well, the years went by until they were in their late 30's, early 40's - each divorced. She now an RN and him a doc. At a Mardi Gras parade on Fat Tuesday in the heart of New Orleans, in the middle of thousands of people, they ran into each other on the street. They spent the next 3 hours huddled together against a building so they could hear each other talk amidst all the noise and craziness. My mother was there that day and said you could literally see the sparks flying

They lived in separate states but became inseparable. Within a year, they were married

That was 12 years ago and I've never seen a stronger marriage or happier people.

It's nice when there can be a happy ending!
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:50 PM
 
Location: Chicago
36,588 posts, read 57,867,463 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mentat View Post
I was looking at Donna Hanover's book, My Boyfriend's Back: 50 True Stories of Reconnecting with a Long-Lost Love, which is the story of getting back with her high school sweetheart after more than 20 years. Reading a few of the stories made me wonder how common this is.

I recently heard from my college sweetheart, from 20 years ago. Although we only talked on the phone, the feelings are still there...

Has this ever happened to any of you? What became of it?
I met a lovely girl in college. The attraction was instant and mutual. The chemistry was palpable. We were both in long-distance relationships with other people so we got to spend a lot of time with each other. How it is we never cheated on our respective S/Os at the time, I'll never know. There were a couple times when we came awfully close.

Fast-forward 8 years. We had both married the S/Os we were dating/engaged to back in college and had gone our separate ways. After not hearing from her for most of those 8 years, she contacted me out of the blue, just as both of our marriages were falling apart only we didn't know it at the time. I sent her a cursory response saying things were fine and that she probably wouldn't hear from me very often since I'm lousy at keeping in touch with people. Two months later my wife walked out, and a month after that she left her husband.

After we relayed the latest developments to each other, we started talking more and more. About 4 months after we started talking again, we met face to face for the first time in 8 years and discovered every ounce of that chemistry was still there. That was nearly 7 years ago and we have been inseparable ever since. Makes us wonder if we shouldn't have just given into that temptation we fought so hard to resist back in the day.
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:51 PM
 
13,779 posts, read 17,016,507 times
Reputation: 7254
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drover View Post
I met a lovely girl in college. The attraction was instant and mutual. The chemistry was undeniable. We were both in long-distance relationships with other people so we got to spend a lot of time with each other. How it is we never cheated on our respective S/Os at the time, I'll never know. But there were a couple times when we came awfully close.

Fast-forward 8 years. We had both married the S/Os we were dating/engaged to back in college. After not hearing from her for most of those 8 years, she contacts me out of the blue, just as both of our marriages were falling apart only we didn't know it at the time. I sent her a cursory response saying things were fine and that she probably wouldn't hear from me very often since I'm lousy at keeping in touch with people. Two months later my wife walks out, and a month after that she leaves her husband. After we relay the latest developments to each other, we start talking more and more.

About 4 months after we started talking, we met face to face for the first time in 8 years and discovered every ounce of that chemistry was still there. That was nearly 7 years ago and we have been inseparable ever since.
That is a great story!
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Old 12-13-2009, 11:59 PM
 
Location: 2nd state in the union...
2,382 posts, read 2,602,594 times
Reputation: 1569
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drover View Post
I met a lovely girl in college. The attraction was instant and mutual. The chemistry was palpable. We were both in long-distance relationships with other people so we got to spend a lot of time with each other. How it is we never cheated on our respective S/Os at the time, I'll never know. There were a couple times when we came awfully close.

Fast-forward 8 years. We had both married the S/Os we were dating/engaged to back in college and had gone our separate ways. After not hearing from her for most of those 8 years, she contacted me out of the blue, just as both of our marriages were falling apart only we didn't know it at the time. I sent her a cursory response saying things were fine and that she probably wouldn't hear from me very often since I'm lousy at keeping in touch with people. Two months later my wife walked out, and a month after that she left her husband.

After we relayed the latest developments to each other, we started talking more and more. About 4 months after we started talking again, we met face to face for the first time in 8 years and discovered every ounce of that chemistry was still there. That was nearly 7 years ago and we have been inseparable ever since. Makes us wonder if we shouldn't have just given into that temptation we fought so hard to resist back in the day.
Now that's a really sweet story, and a prime example of fate working its magic Thanks for sharing!
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Old 12-14-2009, 12:17 AM
 
Location: Huntsvegas
7 posts, read 27,990 times
Reputation: 18
Default ex's are ex's for a reason....

If you get back together with an ex it may be fine for a while, but the reason behind the first break up will rear its ugly little head and will become the reason for you to break up again. The only exception to the rule is if you broke up because of time abd circumstance. Take a long hard look before venturing down that road again. You don't want to waste anymore time with somone you know will not be good for you.
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