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Old 12-19-2009, 10:44 PM
 
25,170 posts, read 33,503,551 times
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Probably not. You can't determine somebody's personality just by a circumstance that they are describing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
This may be a perfect example of one. Several posts. My neighbour constantly seeks my BF's attention..
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Old 12-19-2009, 10:51 PM
 
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Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
Probably not. You can't determine somebody's personality just by a circumstance that they are describing.
I said MAY be . Narcissism does come out in the way you talk and relate to others which it what I saw in there.
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Old 12-19-2009, 10:52 PM
 
Location: The High Seas
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If you brought the experts on narcissism together, you'd still lack a consensus on divisions within the disorder and the number that run through a society. As a character disorder though, people with this problem don't suffer as much as they make others suffer, and they do not have self-esteem because all they have is a false self which they seek to inflate. They're also very exploitative and injure others in surprising ways. If you know a true NPD, run, don't walk.
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Old 12-19-2009, 10:59 PM
 
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That is true. Very good point. I've seen it happen each and every time that I thought someone could have NPD. My knowledge never has failed me.

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Originally Posted by Snort View Post
They're also very exploitative and injure others in surprising ways. If you know a true NPD, run, don't walk.
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Old 12-19-2009, 11:53 PM
 
Location: Western Washington
7,990 posts, read 5,172,974 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
That hasn't been my experience. You are speaking about the narcissists with lower IQ I presume???

The corporate field is cut throat and aggressive. It is filled with narcissism from top to bottom. Narcissists thrive in very competitive environments like that. There are some narcissists that have high IQ and they do very well in those type of jobs. In fact their IQ or special talents are so good that they can juggle many different activities, some unethical, some very ethical. IE: Sabotage co-worker that he or she is envious of and work on campaign to boost corporate cash flow. They claw up the ladder and make it up to supervisor and even board of directors. They may be talented and they might know people with high status and that is what gives them self-permission (fuel) to be mean, nasty, and controlling. Most of all they are resentful of others because the narcissist has worked hard and has special talents yet they still aren't happy with their status, money, power, and amount of control. I presume that they are especially envious of those who are happy and content with whatever they have even if it is far less.
OH no, not at all.....please re-read my post. I am speaking of both average and high IQ individuals. It has been my experience that many of those I am speaking of ARE the bosses. They can't work under others...but MUST be the ones in charge. Oh there are those in supervisory positions of course who display those tendencies...but in my mind are many whom I know who were "forced" to start their own businesses because they simply can not tolerate a position of "worker bee", due to their controlling issues.

Oh....LOL....and for the record....I would have to say that I know at least as many women with these personality traits as I do men!
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Old 12-20-2009, 12:08 AM
 
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Every narcissist I've known is either the boss, the supervisor, or the boss's favorite.

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Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
OH no, not at all.....please re-read my post. I am speaking of both average and high IQ individuals. It has been my experience that many of those I am speaking of ARE the bosses. They can't work under others...but MUST be the ones in charge. Oh there are those in supervisory positions of course who display those tendencies...but in my mind are many whom I know who were "forced" to start their own businesses because they simply can not tolerate a position of "worker bee", due to their controlling issues.

Oh....LOL....and for the record....I would have to say that I know at least as many women with these personality traits as I do men!
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Old 12-20-2009, 01:24 AM
 
Location: Saudi Arabia
1,823 posts, read 1,019,403 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
OH no, not at all.....please re-read my post. I am speaking of both average and high IQ individuals. It has been my experience that many of those I am speaking of ARE the bosses. They can't work under others...but MUST be the ones in charge. Oh there are those in supervisory positions of course who display those tendencies...but in my mind are many whom I know who were "forced" to start their own businesses because they simply can not tolerate a position of "worker bee", due to their controlling issues.

Oh....LOL....and for the record....I would have to say that I know at least as many women with these personality traits as I do men!
I completely agree to it ..my ex's mother is one heck of a narcissist .. her tantrums were extremely unbearable ..she wouldnt even let me and my fiance talk for long hours and would always teach her to over power me or try me in certain ways that would offend anybodys integrity .. i rememeber the conversation i once had with my ex ..she simply started praising about my younger brother and my sisters husbands achievements and the kind of persons they are and often used to tell me im different from the other guys..though i asked her in what sense does she find me different and the list .. i just asked her one question that if shes comparing me to the other individuals and if yes then why ? .. this was a simple question ..which she claimed to be a narcissist behaviour of mine .. either selfish or jeoulous type .. always she hit me below the belt twisting my words pointing fingers at me ..however all i've wanted her to be romantic and have faith in me ..well theres a lot of things i could say against her ..and that'll be slandering which i dont see as a good trait ..please tell me if i was really being narcissistic or expecting something superficial ..and yeah i was her second chump sadly !! ..in short i felt like a puppet ..now that shes outta my life instead of feeling happy i feel sad ..sometimes i miss her so badly ..i loved her so much ..but she blew the horn throwing the blame on me and was still in touch with her ex ..the guy before me .. sorry i couldnt keep up ..sorry folks! im hurt ..really hurt ..
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Old 12-20-2009, 01:24 AM
 
4,838 posts, read 5,019,001 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
If you've read any of the literature on narcissist personalities you'd realize that narcissism is not created by adoring and loving parents. Narcissism is created by abusive parents. They abused with criticism and imposed standards of perfection onto their children. They rarely if ever empathized with their children, hence the inability for the narcissist to have any positive feelings of his or her own. The child never felt special nor was acknowledged as an individual, he or she was held to standards of perfection and always felt under duress and strain to be perfect. You need to get your facts straight.
You are confusing narcissism with low self esteem and bullying tendencies. Narcissists think they are better than others because they been repeatedly told this and have had nothing and no one inform them otherwise. To call this a result of abuse is nonsense.
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Old 12-20-2009, 01:30 AM
 
25,170 posts, read 33,503,551 times
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I think I know what I'm talking about. It is a complete misunderstanding when people presume that NPD is caused because parents coddled and adored their kids. Coddling and adoring doesn't create the hostility and envy that narcissists have hiding beneath their fake smile. But believe whatever you wish to believe.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NotARedneck View Post
You are confusing narcissism with low self esteem and bullying tendencies. Narcissists think they are better than others because they been repeatedly told this and have had nothing and no one inform them otherwise. To call this a result of abuse is nonsense.
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Old 12-20-2009, 01:54 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
11,996 posts, read 12,085,335 times
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What I've read and my own experience around narcissism, their damaged from neglect or abuse, narcissism is the the outcome. Thats their survival skills, even if it's twisted to others. To a certain degree, I actually have empathy for them, but the way they use others is sad. Their only goal is themselves and to meet the needs that weren't met as a child, they don't care who they hurt in the process.
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