Acceptance of Never Marrying (girlfriend, Asian, marry, girls)
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And this is what scares the hell out of me as a man...being used as a sperm donor, money provider, or a "good enough" companion because they want somebody around. Notice the common theme here? Selfishness over and over again. Not once do I see these authors advocating that their readers pursue relationships because of the genuine love and connection with the other person. It's all about their desire to reproduce or pragmatism. Absolutely ****ing disgusting and this is what feminism has given birth to.
As I said before in this thread it just boggles the mind that women today are so spoiled, evidenced by what men all over have been complaining about nowadays and echoed by those such as the author thinking it's "settling" by accepting a men who is *only*"intelligent, funny, solvent, tall, dark, good-looking, mature, reliable and possibly the least egotistical man I've ever gone out with".
I'm pretty open minded and wondered why when there is a shortage of men due to war and other factors why we don't go back to men having multiple wives.
Many cultures the available men might take in the wife of another man who was killed or just in general plural wives is not that uncommon.
There was a story on Nightline about a week ago about the very real shortage of eligible educated black men in the US. Many college educated black women cannot find husbands.
I'm sure I'll take some heat for this but if a man & 2 women can successfully form a happy family and household. Why the heck not ? In this 2 income world maybe the 2nd wife could be the caretaker of the kids and we wouldn't have so many screwed up kids
This is what I am talking about and I agree. I am more concerned about all these children being raised without a mother and father, so if it means that I will make a sacrifice to ensure the healthiness and well-being for the children then I am all for it. Hopefully there will be three incomes available (LOL)!!!
I would say that people need to stop stereotyping, but unfortunately there are many people out there who only serve to reinforce them.
From what I've heard (so don't take this verbatim), there are only a small number of men out there who the majority of women would consider "good catches." This means that many women will either have to settle for someone who doesn't meet all 1001 and of their standards, or never get married. There is always the 3rd option - become the booty call, friends with benefits, etc. - but that is never really the ideal (or realistic long term) situation.
While I don't think marriage is a requisite for happiness, it has come to symbolize what most people do consider an essential for happiness: love and companionship. I'm sure there are individuals in this world who are absolutely content without a significant other, but I believe those people are few. Sure, there will always be those who are bitter, cynical, and jaded enough to firmly declare they don't need anyone, but who would honestly pick solidity over a loving relationship? It's not weak to admit that one needs the love and company of another. It's human nature to want that. We're meant to share our lives with one another.
I think this isn't some isolated trend. I think this is a national and international trend that is happening to both sexes and all ethnic groups. People everywhere are trying new things like living single lives, childfree lives, etc. There's far less social pressure, stigma, and coercion than before as far as how others should lead their private lives. Black women aren't immune to catching the independence bug! I think it was a fallacy for people to believe every man and woman must get married and must have children, and that they must do it in that order. One day we could see far less people marrying and having kids but also see the kids who are born be raised better and see the couples who wed stay together longer.
Yea, exactly. I was reading an article in Scientific American today and the article went on to say that up to 50% of U.S marriages wind up in divorce.
So with that being said, I think more people (like myself) are VERY apprehensive in getting married.
Another thing that turns me off about some Black women is the religious thing, it seems like religion is a HUGE thing with African Americans but often, the lifestyle they lead is as far from anything Godly as I have seen.
Yes, this is true. However, Africans have always been highly spiritual; it goes back into the ancient world, but unfortunately, Africans today don't even realize they are worshiping gods that were given to them by the ones who conquered them. It's the same with contemporary Mexicans who are mostly Catholic.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Repubocrat
the lifestyle they lead is as far from anything Godly as I have seen.
I would say it's the same for everybody in this day and age which is why "religion" means absolutely NOTHING to me. Don't get be wrong, religion is very powerful ideology, but like always, the power is all but in the hands of a few to manage. The few that manage, then go and start things like the christian crusades, the catholic inquisitions or pull a G bush and all out attack the middle east.
I'm pretty open minded and wondered why when there is a shortage of men due to war and other factors why we don't go back to men having multiple wives.
Many cultures the available men might take in the wife of another man who was killed or just in general plural wives is not that uncommon.
There was a story on Nightline about a week ago about the very real shortage of eligible educated black men in the US. Many college educated black women cannot find husbands.
I'm sure I'll take some heat for this but if a man & 2 women can successfully form a happy family and household. Why the heck not ? In this 2 income world maybe the 2nd wife could be the caretaker of the kids and we wouldn't have so many screwed up kids
We were discussing this once at work re the FLDS. One of the women said, "Hey, the men are going to cheat anyway. At least this way you know who the heifer is."
Wow a lot of people posting here have been watching a lot of Blaxploitation films.
btw, I'm a black who loves country music, mainstream films and things that are not Black. Of course, I still enjoy jazz, Chris Rock and soul food.
Not every Black person is completely emerged in Black culture some of us enjoy the best of all worlds. And a good number of us are intelligent, educated and very professional and good at our jobs and don't stand around talking when we should be working.
I used to work with a Black woman who loved country music, too. She took a lot of ribbing for it, especially because she lived in Queens and worked in the city. There weren't a whole lot of country fans in the office. She was from NC originally.
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I think it was a fallacy for people to believe every man and woman must get married and must have children, and that they must do it in that order. One day we could see far less people marrying and having kids but also see the kids who are born be raised better and see the couples who wed stay together longer.
