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Old 01-19-2010, 09:51 PM
 
81 posts, read 297,950 times
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Yep, I am full of questions today. Slow work day... hehe

Just wondering if anyone has been in one of these relationships before? You know: the good times are so fantasmagorically incredible!!!!!! - he/she buys you flowers, showers you with affection both verbally and physically, makes you laugh until you cry, takes care of you, makes sure you're alright... but the bad times are hell on earth.
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Old 01-19-2010, 10:13 PM
 
5,879 posts, read 9,220,630 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SecretlySad View Post
Yep, I am full of questions today. Slow work day... hehe

Just wondering if anyone has been in one of these relationships before? You know: the good times are so fantasmagorically incredible!!!!!! - he/she buys you flowers, showers you with affection both verbally and physically, makes you laugh until you cry, takes care of you, makes sure you're alright... but the bad times are hell on earth.
Just the bad times! But the future is looking so bright I gotta wear shades! That is a song BTW!LOL.....
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Old 01-19-2010, 10:23 PM
 
81 posts, read 297,950 times
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Good for you!
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Old 01-19-2010, 10:25 PM
 
3,284 posts, read 3,509,153 times
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Secretly, don't take this the wrong way, but after reading so many of your threads, you really sound like a sad beaten puppy who longs for any brief moment their owner treats them with any amount of kidness. You're loyal for all the wrong reasons.

I would reevaluate this person who supposedly loves you.
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Old 01-19-2010, 10:28 PM
 
81 posts, read 297,950 times
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Hi Jays.

No I didn't take that the wrong way and thanks for your honesty... that's how I feel sometimes and I have come to accept it. I am not happy with it, but I have accepted it and I am trying to muster up the strength to move on.
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Old 01-19-2010, 11:29 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,230 posts, read 16,489,321 times
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Yes. The good only seemed good compared to the bad. When you're in the red, zero looks like a jackpot.
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Old 01-20-2010, 06:39 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
16,077 posts, read 28,438,354 times
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Posting in a forum may bring feed back, not a substitution for professional counseling.
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Old 01-20-2010, 07:29 AM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,514,730 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SecretlySad View Post
Yep, I am full of questions today. Slow work day... hehe

Just wondering if anyone has been in one of these relationships before? You know: the good times are so fantasmagorically incredible!!!!!! - he/she buys you flowers, showers you with affection both verbally and physically, makes you laugh until you cry, takes care of you, makes sure you're alright... but the bad times are hell on earth.

Story of my life on a daily basis. And 80% of times are bad.
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Old 01-20-2010, 08:04 AM
 
Location: New York, NY
917 posts, read 2,937,448 times
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Well, with my BF, the good times are amazing and I get through the bad times because he is there for me and I'm there for him.

I did date a guy years ago and we had that hot/cold relationship. I don't generally fight with people, but he could make me yell. He never hit me, but if we disagreed on something, we didn't discuss it (as I do with my BF), we fought. However, we also had a great time together when we weren't disagreeing. I broke up with him because I didn't have time for a relationship that volatile, no matter how fun the good times were. It only lasted a few months.
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Old 01-20-2010, 06:36 PM
 
302 posts, read 606,059 times
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IMO...Are the good times "really" that good? I know that may be a silly questions, but stop a moment and really contemplate it....

I was in a relationship, that in my mind, I had convinced myself was really good. He was charming, didn't buy me flowers ever, never bought me cards, showered me with affection both verbally and physically, made me laugh, takes care of you, makes sure you're alright

Ok, so now let me break it down as it REALLY was:
1) Charming - only to manipulate me to do what he wanted me to do
2) Flowers - n0
3) Cards - no
4) Showered me with affection verbally - yes, usually after he showered me with insults
5) Showered me with affection physically - yes, always on his terms; when he wanted it. If I wanted it...he couldn't be bothered. Then there would be times that I made him angry (this was quite often) that he'd angrily grab me by the arm till I'd cry that he was being too rough with me.
6) Made me laugh - sometimes he did because he was really the one that was stupid; not me. Most times, I laughed just because I'm such a happy person
7) Takes care of me - Sure, if you call surveillance cameras everywhere so that he could watch my every move. Bought me a cell phone and set it up (awww....) just to find out that it was because he was angry if we went to the store together & he didn't know where I was. Bought me a computer...just to find him upstairs on another computer tracing my every move through PC Anywhere.
8) Makes sure you're alright - because who else in their right mind would have been married to someone like this; who else would be his slave as he sat on his rump and barked orders constantly

MY point is this....maybe some relationships are incredible one moment and hell on earth another time. If that's the case, then try communicating that with your SO to see if there is some sort of resolution to make it more of an even balance so it doesn't seem like hell....LOL

However, if it's like my previous relationship....please seriously take some time to reflect if you really are happy and feel that you are being treated kindly. It's called an "abusive" relationship.



Quote:
Originally Posted by SecretlySad View Post
Yep, I am full of questions today. Slow work day... hehe

Just wondering if anyone has been in one of these relationships before? You know: the good times are so fantasmagorically incredible!!!!!! - he/she buys you flowers, showers you with affection both verbally and physically, makes you laugh until you cry, takes care of you, makes sure you're alright... but the bad times are hell on earth.
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