My boyfriend of 5 years thinks i'm too fat (couples, average, different)

[Currency Pair Crocodile]

So, how much does the OP weigh now?

It's been 10 days already.

[himain]

I don't know what to tell you as 10 lbs is nothing. Sounds like deeper issues than just that. However, I can say the ex bf and I split after he gained 110 pounds over 4 years. It just wasn't happening...

[gwynedd1]

Originally Posted by mango tango

Tsk, tsk - for all you kiddos know, I could have the ugliest set of eyes on this planet. Why DO I crop all my pictures? Sit on that question for a moment. I leave you with this picture:

Hi mango tango,

I know why. You are sick of the attention, and I adduce the cropping to retaining anonymity to preserve this space. In the city I call it "hot girl" look where eye contact is a no no. I sometimes pity you girls though I thank you for the scenery. What a frustrating currency it is to be an attractive women. You have something of great value, but it is so easily stolen. I suspect attention from someone worth while with intend to commit may be an attention you like. I hope someone rises to the occasion for you.

Gods speed Mango.....

[edwardianlady]

Ditch the guy

[TheImportersWife]

Originally Posted by gwynedd1

Hi mango tango,

I know why. You are sick of the attention, and I adduce the cropping to retaining anonymity to preserve this space. In the city I call it "hot girl" look where eye contact is a no no. I sometimes pity you girls though I thank you for the scenery. What a frustrating currency it is to be an attractive women. You have something of great value, but it is so easily stolen. I suspect attention from someone worth while with intend to commit may be an attention you like. I hope someone rises to the occasion for you.

Gods speed Mango.....

I don't think Mango needs to worry about that.

[gwynedd1]

Originally Posted by himain

I don't know what to tell you as 10 lbs is nothing. Sounds like deeper issues than just that. However, I can say the ex bf and I split after he gained 110 pounds over 4 years. It just wasn't happening...

Hi himain,

Again we know nothing. No longer working out may mean 10 lbs of weight gain combined with 10 pounds of lean tissue turning to fat. If we are speculating on the more superficial nature of it we may as well get it right. The effect may be more like a 20lb swing. Who knows?

Oh one more thing. I noticed in other threads people would speculate that we are not getting the other side of the story. Why is that conspicuously absent about this poor soul?

[2RUGGED4YOU]

Originally Posted by TheImportersWife

I don't think Mango needs to worry about that.

Indeed wise one, indeed!LOL........

[malamute]

Originally Posted by Omgwtfbbq

When we started dating I was either in the gym or at school. I was 135lbs. I am now 145lbs and work full time with a side job. apparently this weight gain is so much that be isn't attracted to me anymore. He still loves me like before, bu how can I really have a relationship with him without sex? My sex drive is much bigger than his. When I try to initiate, he's too busy. When he initiates it happens (obviously). The last two times we had sex were within the last two months and he never finished with me. On top of hardly ever having sex, now I'm not even getting the benefit. What is his problem? Will it REALLY be solved by 10 lbs? What happens when I get pregnant or age?

Dump him now, as you age or if you become pregnant, it's only more weight.

He may have physical problems and blaming you for a 10 pound weight gain.

[Currency Pair Crocodile]

Originally Posted by gwynedd1

Hi himain,

Again we know nothing. No longer working out may mean 10 lbs of weight gain combined with 10 pounds of lean tissue turning to fat. If we are speculating on the more superficial nature of it we may as well get it right. The effect may be more like a 20lb swing. Who knows?

Oh one more thing. I noticed in other threads people would speculate that we are not getting the other side of the story. Why is that conspicuously absent about this poor soul?

Spot on, G. I'm thinking the same too. 10 pounds are hardly noticeable. I'm thinking 30-35. That's what will really start to rile boyfriends up.

[pitt_transplant]

OK..I have been those weights and 10 pounds is not "nothing". Maybe if you are 6 ft tall or its all muscle its "nothing". But to be 100% honest, unless you work out 5'5'' @ 145 looks chunky. Its just a few pounds away from being medically overweight and to start to be a health risk factor. At 145 I was wearing a 12s. At 135 it went from 6-8s. I am an inch or so taller. Call me nuts..but I think that is a big freakin difference.

But that aside...many skinny guy friends in the 20s are freaked out by fat. But they don't go limp over it. The only person I know that had that issue also questioned if he was gay. But to say he wants you to look like a 16 year old makes him sound like a pedo freak. Some girls look like women at that age, but a lot don't.

Either way he sounds annoying for so many other reasons. You are only 22 once. Dump and date around. There is worse but there is better too.