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Yeah, I personally dont really buy the "its all in your head" philosophy either...Thats just another way of saying that people need cognitive therapy..which really only focuses on changing a person's reaction to their situation, but that philosophy doesnt give people the tools to change their situation...
I mean sure, we could all choose to react to everything with a positive outlook and pick dandies through our whole lives, or just completely stop caring altogether, but Ive come to realize that that sort of thinking doesnt solve problems...it just changes the temporary effect of stress you experience about that problem...but sooner or later, those unaddressed issues resurface with the increased weight that has been created by a snowball effect of letting problems linger without addressing them with concern.
As for the first part, given the exceedingly narrow way in which traditionalists define "a real man", I think it's people like you who promote an extremely negative and unattractive image of men.
I couldn't ignore this without at least trying to clarify.
Are you accusing Wanneroo of being a traditionalist?
Just want to make sure we are all on the same page.
Are you saying people who have autistic children made their children autistic by constantly saying they are autistic? That potentially terminal cancer is all in someone's mind? That being laid off from a job is all in someone's head? That losing a loved one can be brushed off as a figment of one's imagination? I totally understand if you want only to date women who haven't experienced any hardships yet. But the moment you tell someone who's suffered a major setback or a personal tragedy that "it's all in your head, get over it, I don't want your drama", you deserve to get dumped.
If you can't change it, why stress over it? If you CAN change it, then do so, and stop worrying.
Why don't men pursue women anymore? Seems it only happens in the movies.
In my own experience, men will give me their phone numbers....and ask me to call them....and I'm 45 years old! This seems messed up.
Any comments gentlemen? Preferably men over 40 to answer please.
(not that the young guys can't answer this.....they don't seem to be the ones afraid....it's the older ones)
Normal age thingy. Unless you look like Halle Berry men's interest in you will likely continue to decrease, sorry I would not even give you my number, I hate talking on the phone
It's ironic, really, because women often tend to be too accommodating in their efforts to please men. They put a lot of emphasis into giving to men and being available to men, and then wonder why men don't appreciate it.
Well, it's because men generally don't appreciate doormats.
No, its because women put all their efforts into pleasing that small slice of men who every other woman is also trying to please. These men know where they stand and take advantage. Nothing good looking women don't do either.
No, its because women put all their efforts into pleasing that small slice of men who every other woman is also trying to please. These men know where they stand and take advantage. Nothing good looking women don't do either.
That hasn't been my experience. I found that the less I gave a rat's arse about men, the more suitors I had, and I'm no Megan Fox.
Perhaps it's because many men find a genuine smile attractive--and after I got rid of my husband, I sure was smiling!
Because today's generation, women act more dominate than their male counterparts. Now, it is the women calling, dinning and chasing the men. When it used to be the other way around. Personally, I prefer to be sort after, I wouldn't feel comfortable chasing after a man, If a man wants you, he will chase you and do the calling.
It works for me all the time. When a man offers his number to me, I look at him and simply say, sorry, I do not call men, they call me...(not in a stuck up way) but a nice way, and you know what...They do the persuing and we take it from there. Woman should not make it so easy for a man. You call him, he bangs you and then leaves you...and women wonder what went wrong...
Not in all cases, but in most cases it occurs, I have five brothers and 7 uncles, they told me, it could be the year 3010, men still like to be the one to chase the woman...if they find you interesting enough.
It works for me all the time. When a man offers his number to me, I look at him and simply say, sorry, I do not call men, they call me...(not in a stuck up way) but a nice way, and you know what...They do the persuing and we take it from there. Woman should not make it so easy for a man. You call him, he bangs you and then leaves you...and women wonder what went wrong...
Well from a man's perspective knowing what I know, if a man wants to get into your pants and that's all he wants, then sometimes he'll enjoy the "challenge" of you waiting or being coy, but you are still going to get dumped. And he might be working on other women at the same time.
In other words, if his intentions are pure sex then that's all they will ever be and you waiting isn't going to change that.
It's a fine line to walk as well because if the challenge is too hard and you've got the fortress up then we just move on somewhere else. I've had women act to the point of disinterest and then they come back at me why I gave up on them. Well all the signals I got were of disinterest so I moved on to make better use of my time. How long do I hang in there for?
I've seen all these books and magazines written by women for women about how to have a man pursue you and much of it is off key. Most of it revolves around psychological game playing, not taking phone calls or acting interested or whatever. That type of "game" may have been cool in high school but I'm in my mid 30's now and I have no interest in such nonsense.
For me if there is no reciprocation I move on quickly. I just have no time for games. I think there are a lot of men out there my age that feel the same.
If it's always me calling you, me arranging the dates, me paying for the dates, me carrying the conversation, THANKS, but I'd rather go kayaking or bike riding on my own.
1. He's a bum (homeless, broke) Can't have romance without finance.
2. Women pursue him (rare but some men go through that)
3. He's gay (He approaches other men)
4. He's ugly and he knows it. (Hey, women care about looks too)
5. He's dead. (got to have life to have women)
When a man offers his number to me, I look at him and simply say, sorry, I do not call men, they call me...(not in a stuck up way) but a nice way, and......
you give them your number - 555-1212
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Seems it only happens in the movies.
I would not even give you my number, I hate talking on the phone 
