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Old 01-21-2010, 09:57 AM
 
2,015 posts, read 2,960,875 times
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...talking to his ex-girlfriend after snooping on his phone. He actually called her up and asked her out after we had a fight, but he later changed his mind and ended up not going out at all.

What I found was a series of voicemails and texts from her asking him if he's still coming, and to please call her, and the last one calling him a jerk for standing her up!

I immediately confronted him and as usual he went on and on about how he was very angry but then got back to his senses and realized he can't do that and that he was sorry and that he has never cheated and never will blah blah blah. He said he does not have many people to talk with and he just wanted to vent to her. I really don't get this.

Now I almost talked to this girl (she answered but I hang up the phone) but thought that would very silly and childish. I didn't even know what to say to her.

Does this guy deserve any chance at all? I love him but I feel my trust is completely broken at this point. How do people get past this type of thing?
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:01 AM
 
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You should have broken up with him the minute you thought you were going to snoop on his phone.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:02 AM
 
Location: Kuwait City, Kuwait.
1,125 posts, read 1,816,090 times
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This is why I have one of those Nokia phones where my Inbox messages are password protected. I got nowt to hide, but I don't want anyone snooping and invading my privacy due to her silly sheer insecurities.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:02 AM
 
Location: Beautiful New England
2,412 posts, read 6,271,152 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLucky View Post
Does this guy deserve any chance at all?
No. His blatant (and presumably unwarranted) cheating means he is not trustworthy. And if you stay with him you're a fool.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:03 AM
 
5,148 posts, read 4,143,854 times
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Originally Posted by Dorrans View Post
This is why I have one of those Nokia phones where my Inbox messages are password protected. I got nowt to hide, but I don't want anyone snooping and invading my privacy.
LOL. I was going to say something like that. My whole Blackberry goes into protected mode the minute I put it into my holster. Snoop proof.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:06 AM
 
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,262 posts, read 15,822,062 times
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Seems the bigger question is: can you truly love someone that you cant trust? It may be time for both of you to move on. He isnt trustworthy and youre a snoop. Not a healthy combination IMO. Good luck though,
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:08 AM
 
Location: My Private Island
4,941 posts, read 7,004,291 times
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That old saying "Don't go snooping because you may not like what you find" rings true!

If you have the need to snoop, then you don't trust him. And now that you have found out about the ex, you have even more reason not to trust him. What else do you need...to catch him in the act...before you get rid of this loser?
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:11 AM
 
Location: Western Washington
8,004 posts, read 9,520,380 times
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So what happens the next time you get into a fight? Are you willing to wait around to find out? Have you done the same thing as him? Did you contact one of your exes when you've gotten into it? If so, then it'd be like the pot calling the kettle black. The fact that he contacted her and actually made plans to hook up....that would be enough for me.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:12 AM
 
2,015 posts, read 2,960,875 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorrans View Post
This is why I have one of those Nokia phones where my Inbox messages are password protected. I got nowt to hide, but I don't want anyone snooping and invading my privacy due to her silly sheer insecurities.
It's only people who have things to hide do something like that normally.
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Old 01-21-2010, 10:18 AM
 
2,015 posts, read 2,960,875 times
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Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
So what happens the next time you get into a fight? Are you willing to wait around to find out? Have you done the same thing as him? Did you contact one of your exes when you've gotten into it? If so, then it'd be like the pot calling the kettle black.
You somewhat nailed it. One of my ex turned into a very good friend and we used to communicate frequently however my BF did not like it when he found out. I apologized and thought this whole matter was over.
Quote:
The fact that he contacted her and actually made plans to hook up....that would be enough for me.
Same here, but I also feel conflicted with the fact that in the end, he did not go ahead with it.
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