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Old 01-25-2010, 07:00 PM
 
3,261 posts, read 2,880,373 times
Reputation: 3890

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Quote:
Originally Posted by dgfurman View Post
I can understand your boss's desire to legitimize his relationship and child, but that is up to him to decide to do, not her. Just b/c she buys a ring and pushes him into it, is not going to make him want to do it. And if he does, I agree, it won't last long, b/c he will be getting b/c of the pressure, not b/c he loves the baby's mom, and wants to have a life together with them.

He sounds like a cad, and needs to grow up. I suppose he will soon enough, when he's paying child support for 2 kids.
With such an overbearing mom who appears to be enabling her son's behavior, she will likely be the one to pay the child support.

Parents should let their grown children deal with the consequences of their mistakes.
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Old 01-25-2010, 08:52 PM
 
4,838 posts, read 5,121,945 times
Reputation: 2906
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dbl-r View Post
Accountablility is a great thing!

God forbid that anyone would be responsible for anything
Good in theory but how can one be accountable to at least 2 pregnant girlfriends?
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Old 01-25-2010, 08:55 PM
 
4,838 posts, read 5,121,945 times
Reputation: 2906
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
I think that the Mom is nuts to help her son by an engagement ring and I am sure it won't be the only money spent. To be fair, the kid is probably a total Mommas boy and needs confirmation on every aspect of his life from his Mother which is sad.
I'd put my money on him having pawned the ring by now. The money will likely be used on a down payment on out of wedlock child #3.

Guys like this are not "momma's boys". They only pretend to be as long as the funding continues.
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Old 01-25-2010, 08:59 PM
 
Location: N of citrus, S of decent corn
16,926 posts, read 19,814,052 times
Reputation: 25830
I'm all for bringing back shame. There would be a lot fewer fatherless children.
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Old 01-25-2010, 09:11 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
44,841 posts, read 56,193,895 times
Reputation: 37885
Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
I'm all for bringing back shame. There would be a lot fewer fatherless children.
I don't think "shame" is what is needed so much as personal responsibility.

For a few generations now with the advent of bigger and bigger government taking care of people, a general entitlement mentality has flourished. A mentality that has wrongly taught people that they don't have to take care of themselves or stand on their own two feet at all. This attitude has resulted in young people now maturing more and more slowly - purposely putting off growing up years after they a truly capable of being self-reliant.

No, shame is not what we need anymore - what we need is parents willing to be parents, not their kids best friend. And kids pushed to be the capable, responsible citizens our civilization needs them to be instead of coddled 20 and 30-somethings who can't balance a checkbook, or buy their own engagement rings
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Old 01-26-2010, 01:55 AM
 
519 posts, read 581,901 times
Reputation: 687
How old is this guy?

He sounds like an irresponsible momma's boy.

I feel sorry for the baby.

I agree with the other posters who pointed out that the mother should have taught her son something about birth control.

I understand that as the grandmother her life will be affected by this baby too - but it was her job to think ahead and make sure her son cared enough about himself and the others in his family to make good decisions when it came to something as irreversable and important as a baby.

Sheesh.

Mom should leave him alone to lay in his bed now.

After she has apologised for not being a good enough mom.
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Old 01-26-2010, 07:40 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,078 posts, read 8,770,130 times
Reputation: 3619
Quote:
Originally Posted by NotARedneck View Post
I'd put my money on him having pawned the ring by now. The money will likely be used on a down payment on out of wedlock child #3.

Guys like this are not "momma's boys". They only pretend to be as long as the funding continues.
LOL You may be onto something. I know a guy like that and he sucks his mother dry as long as the money keeps coming, he keeps taking then he and his wife have the audacity to send out these horrible form letters over Christmas boasting about how they had a vacation in some lavish tropical locale, how Muffy the dog had a pedicure, etc etc... LOL - We just laugh... the guy is such a poser. If his friends only knew his Mother supports him and his wife.
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Old 01-26-2010, 08:44 AM
 
47,586 posts, read 35,384,169 times
Reputation: 21574
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dbl-r View Post
Accountablility is a great thing!

God forbid that anyone would be responsible for anything
True.

I would respect this boss more than someone who didn't encourage responsibility. The child is better off with a father and in the past children were conceived out of wedlock but the father was expected to do the right thing and stay around and help raise his kid. Today many parents encourage their sons to abandon their children and the woman they impregnated.
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Old 01-26-2010, 08:47 AM
 
47,586 posts, read 35,384,169 times
Reputation: 21574
Quote:
Originally Posted by robee70 View Post
With such an overbearing mom who appears to be enabling her son's behavior, she will likely be the one to pay the child support.

Parents should let their grown children deal with the consequences of their mistakes.
Better the grandmother paying than the taxpayers which is so very often the case today.

How is it less enabling if she encourages him to run, to shirk his responsibility? I think it's time for him to man up, marry and at least try to make a marriage now, and support his child even if his mother helps him. That's far better than leaving the woman he impregnated to the taxpayers. Of course that's pretty much the norm now, zero responsibility.
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Old 01-26-2010, 11:14 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
12,029 posts, read 12,415,019 times
Reputation: 13430
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
True.

I would respect this boss more than someone who didn't encourage responsibility. The child is better off with a father and in the past children were conceived out of wedlock but the father was expected to do the right thing and stay around and help raise his kid. Today many parents encourage their sons to abandon their children and the woman they impregnated.
There's such a thing as a middle ground, stepping up to the plate and taking as much responsibility
for the childs welfare and financial responsibility as the mother. Any parent that would encourage there son
to take any less of a role is a loser.
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