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Old 02-03-2010, 01:13 PM
 
559 posts, read 385,684 times
Reputation: 1075

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jays1983 View Post
Sex just kind of happens, a pre-determined time frame is useless. Have sex when the idea feels comfortable with you.
Yep, this is my answer too...
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Old 02-03-2010, 01:26 PM
 
25,085 posts, read 8,863,389 times
Reputation: 41601
I hear what u r saying Sunflower, it does seem like if a guy takes u to dinner and a movie he's hoping to get a little something-something for his efforts almost immediately if not sooner. I don't think five months is too long to ask someone to wait. Just be prepared to stand by your convictions in case he won't. Who can say how many frogs u have to kiss before u come across a prince willing to wait. I think u r wise not to allow ur emotions or feminine urges dictate how soon u get totally involved in a relationship. U need time to make sure it is right for u. If the guy is too impatient he is not for u. U should think of it as a sign, be glad and move on. U will find the right one if u keep looking. I think (LOL)
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Old 02-03-2010, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
13,235 posts, read 10,896,925 times
Reputation: 20521
Quote:
In the end it doesn't really matter so why waste out on sessions when you don't have to haha
Getting to know someone better before you sleep with them is rarely a waste of time.
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Old 02-03-2010, 01:39 PM
 
25,085 posts, read 8,863,389 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dgfurman View Post
Jays, you're cracking me up! I tried to rep you but I gotta spread more love around first.
My sentiments exactly
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Old 02-03-2010, 01:55 PM
 
133 posts, read 185,008 times
Reputation: 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
Getting to know someone better before you sleep with them is rarely a waste of time.
You don't need 5months to "get to know someone" that was the point haha. By 3, 4, 5 dates you should have a pretty good idea on whether or not you like the person and want to take things further...
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Old 02-03-2010, 02:07 PM
Status: "Wilson is innocent, get over it and learn how to read." (set 24 days ago)
 
Location: Northern panhandle of WV
1,621 posts, read 1,580,980 times
Reputation: 1339
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunflower_lol View Post
I noticed there has been an increasing number of people who started having sex on either the first few dates of meeting that person or in only 1 month.

Even 1-2 months would be too fast for me. I'm rather slower and therefore will have the same time frame as it was with my ex b/f. For me, it would be 5 months later or more (depending on the trust level, not just physical attraction).

Currently I'm seeking friends but when the time comes for another relationship, it must be well-though out not ''Well, he's cute and we like each other, that's all it took for me to jump in''.

Is 5 months or more asking too much patience anyways? I noticed the number of patient men have reduced to the point, the movies and media messed up some people's minds. It's one thing if that's your personality but it's a difference if you changed suddenly because of a film or assumptions that if you don't move fast then there's no connection.

Lastly, how long till I find another patience man? I'm not into the ''waiting till marriage'' but I'm a ''Give it several months before jumping in''.
Sunflower there is nothing wrong with wanting to wait and don't let anyone tell you differently. There are plenty of guys out there that
that will respect your wishes and wait until you are comfortable. You will meet a lot that will not respect your opinion though so you just need to get out there and date and weed through the guys.

I agree in that our society has made women feel like they owe sex to a guy just because they went out on a date. It's your body YOU put out when you feel comfortable in doing so. Women are over-sexualized in our society as it is men need to learn women are not on this earth just for their sexual satisfaction.
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Old 02-03-2010, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Sugarland
5,503 posts, read 3,728,683 times
Reputation: 4433
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShanesG View Post
You don't need 5months to "get to know someone" that was the point haha. By 3, 4, 5 dates you should have a pretty good idea on whether or not you like the person and want to take things further...
Not really. People can do a complete 180 after 3-5 dates. Yes, they can do it after 5 months too, but if you're a person who feels that you need to truly get to know someone before sex, a handful of dates is not enough time at all.
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Old 02-03-2010, 02:27 PM
Status: "Wilson is innocent, get over it and learn how to read." (set 24 days ago)
 
Location: Northern panhandle of WV
1,621 posts, read 1,580,980 times
Reputation: 1339
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShanesG View Post
You don't need 5months to "get to know someone" that was the point haha. By 3, 4, 5 dates you should have a pretty good idea on whether or not you like the person and want to take things further...
ShanesG that's not the point, it's up to the woman. Sex is not owed to anyone by a "certain point". It's her body. Obviously you know someone better after a few months than you do after 4 dates so if a woman wants to wait until a few months that's HER perogative. I don't care how long you spent on 4 dates you still don't really know someone after 4 dates. Even married guys that are players can make it through 4 dates, cmon get real. I'll defend any woman's right to wait.
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Old 02-03-2010, 02:29 PM
 
Location: US
47 posts, read 46,555 times
Reputation: 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
Not really. People can do a complete 180 after 3-5 dates. Yes, they can do it after 5 months too, but if you're a person who feels that you need to truly get to know someone before sex, a handful of dates is not enough time at all.
I agree

I think you should get to know a person really well before you sleep with them if you really want a long-term relationship.

Although there are some cases where people sleep together the first week and end up getting married.

But it's all in the way a person thinks and of course we all have different opinions.

I have known my bf since April 2009 and we started going out Jan 2010. We had sex in a wk from going out and I kind of feel dirty lol but that's just me I know i'm not though lol I just saw it as too fast.
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Old 02-03-2010, 02:30 PM
 
Location: Marion, IA
2,785 posts, read 3,788,004 times
Reputation: 1498
If it's longterm, not till marriage. If it's just a fun thing with some sassy tramp, then why wait.
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