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Old 02-21-2010, 01:26 PM
 
19,081 posts, read 11,580,016 times
Reputation: 13212
Quote:
Originally Posted by GrandviewGloria View Post
So, I think that the "anti-woman" threads and posts are a healthy outlet. Maybe some women should be listening.
The few women I know of on this forum that reside in places like you desribe seem to tow the line with gender bashing, but in the opposite direction. "Let him be the kind of his rented box!, etc." The women that argue against bigotry, like me, don't exist within that class. I imagine these men know their audience well enough by now. Although, if the aspect of your argument of lower IQ is indeed the case, such awareness might not factor in. Either way, I fail to see why the women on this forum must be harped upon by the dregs or their SOs. Maybe there should be a trash subforum to appease them.
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Old 02-21-2010, 02:12 PM
 
Location: Lake Oswego, Oregon
1,893 posts, read 1,509,146 times
Reputation: 4726
Quote:
Originally Posted by smel View Post
Wow, you really hated Mississippi didn't you? How long were you there?
From birth, until the end of '09. And 'my people' were there for thousands of years prior to that (well, most of my people: there were a lot of Jewish/French/Scottish pioneers/traders in the mix). We were so poor, I'd never even been outside the state, until I went to a museum exhibit, in college.

Actually, I'm the last member of my extended family to leave. The exodus to better places began in 1959.

A few years back, I was in the car, on a long business trip, with three of Mississippi's wealthiest and most powerful people. I mostly just sat and listened. I was at the bottom of that totem pole...only along to sit in the meetings, crunch the implicit numbers in my head, and silently warn my betters, if something smelled. So being able to listen to these titans talk was like being in a living history book. All the way there, and all the way back, conversation centered on Mississippi: the times in their lives when they could have escaped; whether they regretted having not escaped (yes); what their lives would have been like, if they'd followed their own families out (happy); the periods when they lived elsewhere, and what it was like (heaven); what a miserable place it is... And these, I will stress, were people who basically owned and ran the place.

I loved the place. I loved the climate, even the humidity, and the things that grew there. We'd built a 'Creole Compound', landscaped with native plants... Palmettos, Virginia Creeper, Trumpet Vine, Cherokee Roses, Sand Plums and Cypresses, and surrounded by an antique brick wall... I loved it. But the people, I did not love.

There's a very telling passage in a story by Eudora Welty. In it, someone is lamenting the change in the nature of the people going down the road in front of her house. People were just not of the same quality. And that really explains it. The quality of the people there is declining. It was time to leave.
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Old 02-21-2010, 04:36 PM
 
8,681 posts, read 7,191,649 times
Reputation: 14922
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
The few women I know of on this forum that reside in places like you desribe seem to tow the line with gender bashing, but in the opposite direction. "Let him be the kind of his rented box!, etc." The women that argue against bigotry, like me, don't exist within that class. I imagine these men know their audience well enough by now. Although, if the aspect of your argument of lower IQ is indeed the case, such awareness might not factor in. Either way, I fail to see why the women on this forum must be harped upon by the dregs or their SOs. Maybe there should be a trash subforum to appease them.
All in all, it's counterproductive. I look at it this way: Men coming on here complaining about women in sweeping, nasty generalizations are doing it for two reasons: 1. To attract other miserable men so they can have a pity party, 2. To tick women off, because hey, getting attention for being a toad is better than not getting any attention at all, right?

They certainly cannot expect grown women to take them seriously, never mind act on what the toads say. I mean, they're living in a fantasy world if they think that suddenly women everywhere are going to say, "Gee, fella, you're right, we ARE such gold-digging, ball-breaking, ho-bag beyotches. Let us change our heartless ways!"

It's really as simple as this, for both sexes: Consider your audience. If you come to a forum about relationships with the opposite sex, and then you proceed to lambast the opposite sex, people of the opposite sex on the forum are going to regard you as a consummate sphincter.

Last edited by Yzette; 02-21-2010 at 04:52 PM.. Reason: I can haz grammar?
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Old 02-21-2010, 07:40 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,693 posts, read 16,894,563 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by NotARedneck View Post
Why would they bother? With the quotas for hiring, some years back, 50% of the hires where I worked were female and only 14% of the applicants.

This was hardly a rare situation. This left many young men out of luck when it came to using their education. Naturally, fewer today are willing to risk getting an education and all the debt that entails, with the odds stacked firmly against them. Men may be oppressed now days (and for the past 25 years) but they aren't stupid.
That's true, women have the OPPORTUNITY to do all those things, but alot of them just don't do it. Men can't be totally blamed for how women think.
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Old 02-21-2010, 07:55 PM
 
19,081 posts, read 11,580,016 times
Reputation: 13212
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
That's true, women have the OPPORTUNITY to do all those things, but alot of them just don't do it. Men can't be totally blamed for how women think.
Is this sarcasm?
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Old 02-22-2010, 08:27 AM
 
Location: In my skin
8,029 posts, read 8,704,743 times
Reputation: 7850
Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post
All in all, it's counterproductive. I look at it this way: Men coming on here complaining about women in sweeping, nasty generalizations are doing it for two reasons: 1. To attract other miserable men so they can have a pity party, 2. To tick women off, because hey, getting attention for being a toad is better than not getting any attention at all, right?

They certainly cannot expect grown women to take them seriously, never mind act on what the toads say. I mean, they're living in a fantasy world if they think that suddenly women everywhere are going to say, "Gee, fella, you're right, we ARE such gold-digging, ball-breaking, ho-bag beyotches. Let us change our heartless ways!"

It's really as simple as this, for both sexes: Consider your audience. If you come to a forum about relationships with the opposite sex, and then you proceed to lambast the opposite sex, people of the opposite sex on the forum are going to regard you as a consummate sphincter.
LMAO!!!! Bravo! This was greatness.
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Old 02-23-2010, 05:34 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,693 posts, read 16,894,563 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
Is this sarcasm?
No it's not.
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Old 02-23-2010, 10:19 AM
 
19,081 posts, read 11,580,016 times
Reputation: 13212
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
No it's not.
I'm either misunderstanding your post or his post. He's addressing men. What's true about women IRT to his post?
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Old 02-23-2010, 12:35 PM
 
951 posts, read 963,319 times
Reputation: 615
Quote:
Originally Posted by NotARedneck
Why would they bother? With the quotas for hiring, some years back, 50% of the hires where I worked were female and only 14% of the applicants.

This was hardly a rare situation. This left many young men out of luck when it came to using their education. Naturally, fewer today are willing to risk getting an education and all the debt that entails, with the odds stacked firmly against them. Men may be oppressed now days (and for the past 25 years) but they aren't stupid.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
That's true, women have the OPPORTUNITY to do all those things, but alot of them just don't do it. Men can't be totally blamed for how women think.
Women have elbowed their way into all the white collar/professional opportunities. Sometimes they got the education required and sometimes quotas helped a lot. In the process, they have depressed wages in these areas. (Its only basic economice we are talking about here)

In the process, some of the work areas that they weren't interested in have seen their relative incomes rise. However, this only applies to sectors where cheap illegal mexican labor cannot be used. This just creates more fodder for the lies about women earning 70% of men. Compare apples with apples and there is no disparity.

Meanwhile, in the few sectors where women and Mexicans haven't depressed the wages, men are praying that they won't be noticed.
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Old 02-23-2010, 04:56 PM
 
3,424 posts, read 3,287,076 times
Reputation: 1769
Quote:
Originally Posted by GrandviewGloria View Post
I think the problem is more pronounced at the left (dumb) end of the Bell Curve, where Sexual Dimorphism (both physical and psychological) is most extreme. The androgynous upper classes seem not to harp at each other so much, because the men and women are more alike.

We just fled a part of the country where the men are supposed to be one thing, and the women are supposed to be the exact opposite. Mississippi, BTW, has the lowest collective IQ of any state. The men are miserable, because the women treat them like retarded children who need to be constantly controlled. As one of my friends said "The women infantilize the men, and then the men fecalize themselves."

So the men are supposed to be rotund football-playing/football-watching/deer-hunting mutes, whose primary purpose in life is to give money to women (and go off to die in wars, if they don't get their necks broken "giving 100%" on the football field), while the women get to be precious princesses: running around screeching cute banter, painting themselves up like hookers, and prissing around playing 'businesswomen'. They think the 'cute' little insults and belittlements they heap upon their men are appreciated, and that the men somehow 'need' to be controlled, belittled, and manipulated. WRONG!

In the ultimate Chick Flick, Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood, the Southern Bi&#h viewpoint is expressed. The wife is Vivi, who marries a gorgeous stud, and proceeds to make his life hell, while he works himself to death in the Cotton fields, to keep her in helmet hair and chiffon dresses. Toward the end of their lives Vivi asks Shep (how appropriate, considering that Southern women treat their men like dogs), "Did I ruin your life?" and Shep answers "No, you just made it interesting."

Well, that's the chick-flick fantasy version of reality...and I really think that's what Southern (and low-end Northern) women tell themselves is going on. In reality, the men get the short end of the stick. Yes, Vivi did ruin Shep's life. She, in fact, wasted his life. Occasional access to a hoo hoo cannot be adequate compensation for having been turned into a serf. The men in those relationships don't get anything out of it: and only enter into/stay in those arrangements, because of societal expectations. They're trapped. And I think that a lot of men who resist the bubbaization process end up as the bitter posters who are being described in this thread.

I have certainly been the target of those little men. They tend to be churchey types, and try to heap condescension on me. One, after my first post on the Mississippi Forum, announced that I obviously had "Little Woman Syndrome" (we lived in the State's richest town, and I was describing it, in glowing terms). Not sure what that meant, but it was obvious to me that he regularly was being abused by the "Little Woman" at home, and probably had been abused by his mother, as well. And, I'd assume he makes less money than he'd like, and so, deep-down, sees himself as a failure. Well, it's not my fault his wife is driving around with his 'boys' hanging from the rearview mirror of her Crown Victoria.

I think that internet fora are the only outlet men like that really have. They can't go to hunting camp and fishing rodeos, and get drunk and complain about their wives, as the bubbas do (and their 'morality' doesn't allow them to have clandestine hunting camp bromances, which I hear and hope are commonplace among the bubbas. The churchey men aren't supposed to express thoughts like "My wife is a belittling bi&%c.", in the Men's Sunday School class.

And then, there are the men, who after putting up with princesses, are then demonized, slandered, divorced, and destroyed, by their wives. How must they feel?

So, I think that the "anti-woman" threads and posts are a healthy outlet. Maybe some women should be listening.
+1 -- I found this to be an excellent post...the women on these forums will make of these men's concerns what they will, regardless of where the men air their discontent.. Their voices would be taken no more seriously if they were using any other medium...so I hope they dont let the fact that some people here exist solely to marginalize and invalidate the importance of their discontent, dissuade them from continuing to speak out about the disparities that men currently endure.

It is an inherent defense mechanism to dismiss that which is unpalatable...But its important that men on this forum nor elsewhere dont take heed to the criticism and tactics of belittlement exercised by the women on this thread.

These men have legitimate concerns and they have a right to express them...and others have a right to dispute them...but regardless of who disputes what the reality is that many men do find it therapeutic to hear the similar outlooks of other men...Mainstream media largely tends not to cater to mens' concerns

Call it pity party, whiny or whatever... its no different than any other support group or group of people with like objectives who convene to discuss the issues important to them. No single man or woman this forum is in a position to affect change either way...so it doesnt hurt anyone to hear the perspectives of these men, and as previously stated, it may even help some to know that they're not alone in their perception of the world around them...I say keep bringing gender inequalities to the fore, and I hope that these men know that their concerns are legitimate and with enough will, can be changed for the better eventually...they dont have to be silent nor compliant.
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