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Old 02-22-2010, 12:14 PM
 
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If your husband is the sole breadwinner in the house for whatever reason and you only have joint accounts, is it wrong to slowly save (those extra dollar bills that find their way into your purse) into a secret account?

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Old 02-22-2010, 12:15 PM
 
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Wouldn't this be stealing?
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:16 PM
 
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Good question Jsizzle... anyone else? How about this, what if the woman is able to work, is it ok to then save your money in a secret account? What if the woman can't work? ie. raising children, disabled, etc?

Last edited by Deja Vu Again; 02-22-2010 at 12:18 PM.. Reason: More thoughts added
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:17 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
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The only scenario I can imagine where that could be OK is if an abused spouse is trying to save up money to escape.
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:19 PM
 
Location: Tempe, AZ
740 posts, read 1,230,298 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deja Vu Again View Post
If your husband is the sole breadwinner in the house for whatever reason and you only have joint accounts, is it wrong to slowly save (those extra dollar bills that find their way into your purse) into a secret account?

Opinions?
Nothing wrong with having your own bank account, but I would not keep it a secret, that just strikes me as sneaky. Besides, come tax time you'd still have to declare the interest, assuming it was an interest bearing account
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:21 PM
 
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As a small nest egg for some serious problem, its not an issue at all.

However, I know of a guy at work whose wife hid most of their $1.6 million net worth before filing for divorce. Then she went after her "share" of what she couldn't get her hands on. I expect that in a few years, she'll move to the tax haven where she hid it.
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:23 PM
 
Location: New York, NY
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If you feel you have to keep it secret, you shouldn't be in that relationship, whether it's due to trust issues or abuse.

If you're saving to escape, that's one thing, although there are battered women's shelters and other resources. Is it really worth it to save up money on the sly though when your life is in danger?

If you just don't trust your partner, you shouldn't be with them.

I don't have a problem with separate bank accounts- they work really well for some couples. If you feel you have to be sneaky about it, you have bigger problems than money in your relationship.
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:24 PM
 
Location: DC
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Your own bank account is fine, but unless you're talking about an abusive situation (or perhaps one where he has spending/gambling issues), I don't know why you'd keep it a secret.

Also, if he's the sole breadwinner (i.e. I don't work at all), I don't know if I'd feel right taking some money away and putting it aside just for myself.


Edit: I completely agree with StinaTado
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:25 PM
 
Location: In my skin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
The only scenario I can imagine where that could be OK is if an abused spouse is trying to save up money to escape.
I agree.

Quote:
Originally Posted by typhoidmary View Post
Nothing wrong with having your own bank account, but I would not keep it a secret, that just strikes me as sneaky. Besides, come tax time you'd still have to declare the interest, assuming it was an interest bearing account
Exactly. If I was married, I'd probably have both. Haven't really decided on that one yet.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JSizzle225 View Post
Wouldn't this be stealing?
Hmmm, dunno. Can you steal what is already yours?
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Old 02-22-2010, 12:29 PM
 
3,059 posts, read 8,254,788 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deja Vu Again View Post
If your husband is the sole breadwinner in the house for whatever reason and you only have joint accounts, is it wrong to slowly save (those extra dollar bills that find their way into your purse) into a secret account?

Opinions?
I wouldn't do it personally, but my marriage is sound and I don't have one foot out the door. If you (?) feel that the marriage is in trouble and don't believe that your spouse would be fair in the event of a split, then I can understand wanting to put away some money for survival in the event that that happened. Is it wrong? Not sure.
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