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Old 02-23-2010, 03:19 PM
 
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as a woman, I don't expect a man to support me. I expect him to be responsible for his own expenses and financial stability, and I do the same for myself

however if there are children involved, it's a different story, because there are extra expenses for both parents, and it may require a parent to cut back on their own financial earning to stay home with babies and young children

however it is never a deal breaker for me how much money a man makes as long as he doesn't expect me to pay for his expenses

 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:21 PM
 
Location: My Private Island
4,941 posts, read 8,306,543 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DavieJ89 View Post
Most women I know are married to men who work while they (the women) do not.

I'm terribly sorry to be negative, but yes women regardless of age want a guy who makes SIGNIFICANTLY more then her if she even works at all, and support her shopping habits.

I know one man who's wife made him get two jobs so he could pay for her shopping while she refuses to work. Its sad that is this way, but thats life and there's nothing you can do about it

Women say you dont need money, but really you do. Its about as much bs as women saying they want a nice guy who will treat them right, then they turn around and date the overly possessive, physically abusive bad boy

Women want the opposite of what they say. And quite frankly their standards are WAY too high.

You are single, making enough to comfortably support yourself, so in my book you are a real man, who is going his own way and not listening to some harpie tell you what to do. Good for you I'd rep you but I'd have to spread it around more first
Has somebody has been watching too many of the "Real Housewives of OC, NY, ATL" episodes!

If a man is STUPID.....yes I said STUPID enough to work two jobs because his wife MADE him do so to support her shopping habits, then he deserves the hell he lives in.
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:21 PM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
10,168 posts, read 20,715,393 times
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Most want a man who can provide. Now if you know your partner well enough, you'll know what "provide" means in regard to her lifestyle and your earnings. It shouldn't take long to figure out, actually, she'll save you the trouble of having to figure it out once she knows whether or not you can provide. And no, this isn't a gold-digger post, there's absolutely nothing wrong with a woman pursuing a man who can provide for a household, or at the very least cover his own ass.
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:23 PM
 
21,904 posts, read 19,046,725 times
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the down side to men with money is that many of them see it as a way of control, manipulation, and having the upper hand so they can call all the shots, as in "i pay the bills, so i make all the decisions and you do whatever i tell you to"

i was in that sort of marriage and it was horrible. i left that marriage.

nowadays i would rather be with a man who is a partner rather than a dictator, because too many men use money as a means of lording it over others. I am with someone for the joy of their companionship. That is a far more satisfying and respectful and honest relationship for me.
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:26 PM
 
635 posts, read 1,700,583 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by miu View Post
Yes! Of course, given the choice between a guy with money and a guy just able to support himself, I'd rather have the guy with money. But... it really depends on the situation.

In your case, is there the potential for you to make more money? Or do you think that you will forever be a person that can only make enough money to support one person? Are you able to have a savings account? What are you spending your money on? Are you making new car payments? Is that car nicer than you need? Are you a renter? Do you plan to buy a condo or house later on? What do you think your retirement might be like?

I've found that different people can make the same money, but what they do with their paychecks is completely different. If a guy is not making a lot of money, but is a saver and good with what he has, that is more reassuring than a guy that makes a lot of money, but is also a big spender.

Otherwise, for you, you might want to avoid trying to date any woman that wants to marry and have a family.
Not a big spender, I have a savings account, a 2006 car that should be paid off next year, i have my own house that i bought as an investment - done remodeling, intent to sell it or rent in the near future to expand my real estate investments...
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:33 PM
 
8,679 posts, read 15,228,839 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emirate25 View Post
I am a 29 year old bachelor who makes enough to live comfortably for 1 person. But if I had a wife, I wouldn't be able to support her. My fear of dating or finding someone is because I think I don't make enough money. My question is, do women really want a guy that makes more than her and can support her?
One day, people will stop lumping all women into one group and all men into another.

The bottom line, no pun intended, is that every woman is different, just like every man is different. Some want a 50-50 split and have no intention of giving up their careers to stay home with children. Others might like to find a spouse who will be able to pick up the slack for a few years while they stay home until the kids are in school. Others might like to find a spouse who will stay home while they work. I know people in every category, even women who make six figures whose husbands make less than half. It's mix and match.

If you want a wife and family, you'll just have to do it the old-fashioned way, by sussing out potential candidates, dating, and developing a relationship. It's really between you and the person you fall in love with.
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:35 PM
 
21,904 posts, read 19,046,725 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emirate25 View Post
if I had a wife, I wouldn't be able to support her. I think I don't make enough money. do women really want a guy that can support her?
it may be valuable for you to explore your views and beliefs about being with a woman and "being able to support her", what that means to you, how you see relationship with a woman

which would you rather be with and why? a woman who expects you to support her and pay for everything all the time? or a woman who also contributes financially to covering the expenses of a household (such as rent, food, travel).

many women find it preferable to have their own income and their own job because then they feel more stable and safe financially and emotionally. Many women consider it stupid and dangerous and unwise to rely on some man to support them because there are too many dangers: the guy could be a loser, the guy could die, the guy could run off with someone else, the guy could run up expenses, and she is left with nothing but debt.

so begin to explore and define for yourself what YOU want with a woman, and why in a relationship, rather than trying to be someone you think will please someone else.
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:36 PM
 
Location: Beautiful New England
2,412 posts, read 7,159,591 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post
One day, people will stop lumping all women into one group and all men into another.

The bottom line, no pun intended, is that every woman is different, just like every man is different. Some want a 50-50 split and have no intention of giving up their careers to stay home with children. Others might like to find a spouse who will be able to pick up the slack for a few years while they stay home until the kids are in school. Others might like to find a spouse who will stay home while they work. I know people in every category, even women who make six figures whose husbands make less than half. It's mix and match.

If you want a wife and family, you'll just have to do it the old-fashioned way, by sussing out potential candidates, dating, and developing a relationship. It's really between you and the person you fall in love with.
Very well said!
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:37 PM
 
635 posts, read 1,700,583 times
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I definitely want and looking for a woman to contribute to the household financially, 50/50. But I personally have encountered many women that say this at first but when it comes down to something serious, they are like I want to have kids and not work...
 
Old 02-23-2010, 03:39 PM
 
21,904 posts, read 19,046,725 times
Reputation: 18031
i can also say that as a woman, if a man pays for everything and "supports" me it feels like nothing but trading sex for money, and that is prostitution plain and simple, and I choose not to go there
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