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Old 03-04-2010, 05:41 PM
Location: Texas
8,062 posts, read 15,229,273 times
Reputation: 3637


No. I'm a writer myself and would love to devote a lot of time to my poetry. No can do. Instead, I worked as an editor and teacher to make a good living. I write poetry in my spare time. If I'm ever published -- GREAT! But I can't spend a lot of time on it.
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Old 03-04-2010, 05:50 PM
2,084 posts, read 3,903,912 times
Reputation: 1169
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
Yes, because I'm the sappy sort who likes to support my SOs hopes and dreams.
Same here especiallly if I know that he is the person for me. I would rather have love in my life than riches and material things. Quite honestly if we lost everything we own right now, I would be happy with my kids and husband.
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Old 03-04-2010, 06:11 PM
8,680 posts, read 12,071,936 times
Reputation: 15183
I'm a freelance writer.

Never mind money. I wouldn't date another writer or "creative" simply because there's only room for one crazy person in a relationship.

But getting back to money... As you said, many, if not most, artists and writers take traditional jobs to pay the rent. Marriages and relationships can become strained if the creative person just up and quits and there are mouths to feed at home, though. Likewise, if the creative person wants to pursue his or her art but the other person in the relationship is like my wasband, who couldn't figure out what he wanted to be when he grew up and never seemed able to hold a steady job, the creative person is going to feel resentful. That's one reason I got divorced. I knew I would never be able to freelance if I had stayed married to him. Although I wouldn't mind tightening the belt for myself, I couldn't support two people on it for the time it takes to really start seeing some serious profit, so I felt trapped.

Anyway, even freelancers can make a nice piece of change. It's all about embracing the business side of it. A number of my colleagues push six figures a year. They accept that they have to do a lot of less exciting but higher paying work to be able to take on the creatively fulfilling but low-paying work they love. It's also necessary to put in ugly hours at times. And that's another thing: It's a rollercoaster with busy times and dead times, and a smart freelancer sets aside some of the feast for when there's a famine.

So, if the "creative" in question is a beautiful dreamer who rails against compromising his or her precious art and squawks about "commercialization," well, you'd better have a good enough income for both of you.

But if the creative understands that it's a business that requires hours and hours of business activities like marketing, negotiating fees, traveling for client meetings, and chasing down money that clients owe, then you have someone who, though perhaps struggling now, is destined for success. It's true what they say: It's 10% talent and 90% hard work.

Sorry for the book here!

Last edited by Yzette; 03-04-2010 at 07:02 PM.. Reason: Brevity, lass. Brevity!
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Old 03-04-2010, 06:15 PM
541 posts, read 1,058,317 times
Reputation: 325
my european grandma (who was a very wise woman)used to say:loves goes through the stomach.I saw many couples in my life,whose relation,marriage broke because of money.

We have a great german work ethic and i would never accept a man,who does not work..if he has no work in his profession,then he must work another job,if he is healthy and capable of work..only dreaming is not enough to support a familly...i woudl encourage him to try in his profession..if he is not succesful,sorry, he must move on,find another direction...like teatime..you can still remain an artist or writer ..after the job... a man must contribute to the finace of the familly...not sit at home,dream and not bring any penny in the house...i am a realist person,i would put him the number on teh table for a wake up call...if he does not wake up,oh well,time for me to move on...
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Old 03-04-2010, 06:23 PM
Location: NC
10,009 posts, read 8,115,143 times
Reputation: 3045
If I loved them yes. If not then no.

I tend to think income and profession should be tertiary in something like marriage.
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Old 03-04-2010, 06:27 PM
Location: In my skin
8,413 posts, read 12,994,847 times
Reputation: 8321
Originally Posted by Onglet39 View Post
No I would not. I already did that, and it cost me a lot of money throughout the marriage and divorce. I will not date anyone who is struggling to make ends meet unless his track record indicates he is just having a rough patch due to our slow economy.
Ditto to this. I should say, specifically, that I wouldn't walk into a situation like this. I think anyone who wants to have a partner in their lives should consider the hardship they'd be subjecting the other to. Struggling by yourself is one thing, to expect someone to struggle with you is a tall order.

If I am already committed/married and he shows great promise and discipline and we have the means for him to pursue this while cutting back on work, sure.
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Old 03-04-2010, 08:34 PM
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 73,719,622 times
Reputation: 22814
If I were a woman of independent means, maybe I can keep me a hot lazy artist... The way things stand, though, I can't afford to support a man and don't have any desire, either. Even if could, I don't think I'd want to... I'd lose respect for him. The opening sentence is really a joke.
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Old 03-04-2010, 08:41 PM
Location: Pa
42,183 posts, read 39,102,057 times
Reputation: 24322
As an artist myself, yes the working word is hard and you take what job you can get. Now a days many are like this. Many of my friends have jobs that has nothing to do with what they majored in college for.
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Old 03-04-2010, 08:43 PM
Location: in the good ol' South
865 posts, read 1,960,290 times
Reputation: 860
I couldn't do it. I could afford to, but I wouldn't want to. My brother is a struggling artist - and he is TALENTED. But that barely puts bread on his table, let alone for anyone else. He's had gfs, but I think some relationships haven't worked out, b/c most women don't want to see themselves constantly struggling. Not having money is really tough on relationships.
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Old 03-04-2010, 08:44 PM
Location: southern california
53,432 posts, read 68,353,215 times
Reputation: 45014
"artistic occupation" is latin for unemployed.
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