Spent a couple hours with an 18 year old girl (marriage, friendship, experiences)

[Ivorytickler]

Originally Posted by cuinlalaland

...which is not something I normally do at 32. But you know what? I was pleasantly surprised just how mature she was, how much we had in common, and how easily we conversed. Basically we talked non-stop for 2 hours and were interrupted or we probably could have gone on all day.

Although I'm not interested in this particular girl for anything besides friendship. My recent experiences with her and a 20 year old girl have me rethinking the whole plan to limit my dating to 25+. Apparently girls in their late teens and early twenties aren't all immature and/or crazy

CAUTION. That you found one as mature as you doesn't mean she's mature. It could mean you're on the immature side. Even if she is mature for her age, you have no way of knowing if she's done maturing and if she's not, she will pass you by in a few years because you're on the same level now. Women really do mature a lot from 18 to 25. A 25 year old who is on your level isn't likely to change on you. An 18 year old very well might.

I speak from experience here. I was 19 and my husband 31 when we married. I was not done growing up. He was. Experience is necessary for maturity but not sufficient. While having experience won't guarantee maturity, lack of experience ususally means immaturity. If she's on the same level as you now, where will she be in 5 years? You're done maturing. Is she?

[BriInNH]

Originally Posted by cuinlalaland

64 was the last year for the Baby Boomers. Gen X should be roughly 64-82 shouldn't it?

Gen-x has always been early 60s through mid 70s birthdates to me.

[gwynedd1]

Originally Posted by cuinlalaland

64 was the last year for the Baby Boomers. Gen X should be roughly 64-82 shouldn't it?

Hi cuinlalaland,

Yes that is correct. The distinction is important. Both boomers and Gen-X, as misguided as they may have been, each had parents before the deterioration began. Gen-Y is the first generation raised with easy divorce and boomer sensuality.

[Randomstudent]

Originally Posted by mango tango

As much as I hate to say this, much of my generation is rather. . . uhm, trying to think of polite adjectives. . . vapid? immature? obnoxious? I live in the vast murky pit of Generation X and it's like the Twilight Zone sometimes.

I think it depends on how they were raised though. I've met the parents of some of my peers and suddenly everything makes so much sense.

That really does explain a fair amount about a surprising large number of people.

[laurenaus]

younger girl older guy thing is nice but only temporarily. NOT sustainable in my opinion (and experience). Guy is usually trying to feel younger by doing it. That's certainly one way to ward off the fear of aging!! (;

[CESpeed]

Well you wanted to let her know she wasn't wasting her time and now that you let her know, she feels that she has "permission" to break the touch barrier. So when are you going to take her out for a proper date?

Enquiring minds want to know.

[gwynedd1]

Originally Posted by laurenaus

younger girl older guy thing is nice but only temporarily. NOT sustainable in my opinion (and experience). Guy is usually trying to feel younger by doing it. That's certainly one way to ward off the fear of aging!! (;

Hi laurenaus,

That is a female projection. Women like to feel young. Men want to feel something young. They act younger to try and blend in. The bottom line is men are after sex, not feeling young.

[laurenaus]

Originally Posted by gwynedd1

Hi laurenaus,

That is a female projection. Women like to feel young. Men want to feel something young. They act younger to try and blend in. The bottom line is men are after sex, not feeling young.

Men are insecure about aging and dating a young girl can be a symptom of this. Their insecurities are just not as projected as much by the media. If men really didn't give a **** then why is hair replacement a multibillion dollar industry? Who is the new target for cosmetic surgery? Men; with more and more of them turning to plastic surgery.
Women wanting to feel young is largely based on the influence of American media and is not a natural phenomenon imo.


"I know there are good/bad men in every nation, but I personally have found through living in the U.S. most of my life, and knowing alot of American men, and studying psychology/sociology, etc. and just talking to men at work, social events, etc. that American men are much more concerned with a woman's age than European men..when it comes to dating. In other words, American men are more hung up on 'youth'.
European men that I know and met though, have not been so focused on age. I've been to several countries, and have seen women looking obviously older with men hand in hand, and have seen men whistle at women over 30, and many did look over 30. Men just admired beauty, or what they found to be attractive, regardless of age." (recently posted on a forum I visit)

That wasn't really my point though, my point was that while age gap dating is nice, new and exciting.. in many cases it is not sustainable.

[thatsong64]

Originally Posted by JordanJP

Maybe they treat you different because they perceive you as being older and more experienced, and want to impress you?

I think this is a definite possibility.

Originally Posted by JordanJP

I can't catch any breaks, 4 of 5 have been as nutty as crunchy peanut butter)

haha! Keep trying, humor goes a long way. Good luck

[cuinlalaland]

Originally Posted by laurenaus

younger girl older guy thing is nice but only temporarily. NOT sustainable in my opinion (and experience). Guy is usually trying to feel younger by doing it. That's certainly one way to ward off the fear of aging!! (;

I'm 32 not 72

Well you wanted to let her know she wasn't wasting her time and now that you let her know, she feels that she has "permission" to break the touch barrier. So when are you going to take her out for a proper date?

Enquiring minds want to know.

Two different girls.