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Old 03-17-2010, 06:19 PM
 
Location: Tampa, Florida
13,523 posts, read 16,768,705 times
Reputation: 8474

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mango tango View Post
Yes, this is one of those threads.

I've been seeing this one particular guy at the gym regularly for the past few months. We've never talked to each other and to be quite honest, I'm not 100% sure if he even knows I exist since he's never blatantly looked at or acknowledged me when I was taking a peek at me. In my defense, my natural face at the gym is part ice queen, part *****. I'm incapable of beaming smiles and jogging simultaneously. It should be said that this guy is h-o-t. I tell myself that when we make eye contact, I will flash a warm smile, but we never do.

On to the point: I'm developing a crush. I've been considering opening the lines of communication between us, but it seems near impossible! He's always so wrapped up in his work out and socializing with the other guys weight lifting. He barely pays any attention to any female so it's fair to say he is not at the gym to pick-up chicks.

I'm the type of girl that goes to the gym to work out and sweat and this the first time someone has caught my eye. It's pretty easy to strike up a conversation in most other environments, but the gym has me hopelessly lost. I'm clueless about flirting at the gym. Is it creepy? From what I gather, most people are at the gym to work out, not get a date.

But wow. . . I haven't had a crush like this in a very long time. I feel like a randy schoolgirl with a really bad case of the giggles and flushed cheeks.
You know that the gym is one of the easiest places in a world for a woman to get hit on?

Seriously, unless you think you're out of his league, just go talk to him. It's that simple. Just go do it.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:19 PM
 
Location: The Mango Tree
2,115 posts, read 4,133,615 times
Reputation: 2624
Yeah, both J's are right.

He's obviously aware of me since he's not an imbecile. Also, it's clear that I'm not going to reel him in purely on my appearances alone.

This is definitely going nowhere fast. God, it's time for me to bite my lip and just jump, isn't it?
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:21 PM
 
3,284 posts, read 2,427,297 times
Reputation: 1832
Quote:
Originally Posted by mango tango View Post

This is definitely going nowhere fast. God, it's time for me to bite my lip and just jump, isn't it?
Yes.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:22 PM
 
921 posts, read 1,233,583 times
Reputation: 606
Quote:
Originally Posted by spinx View Post
You seriously still interested in this guy?

Not only is that really rude, but it's also immature. He sounds like a douche and a half.
No doubt. Sad but true example of how important physical attraction is to not just guys, but also girls. Even a jerk can still get girls, he just needs looks.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:22 PM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,413 posts, read 3,700,813 times
Reputation: 6641
Quote:
Originally Posted by mango tango View Post
Hello chickas and strong, masculine men!

The following is going to read out like a note passed by a thirteen year old girl. You were forewarned.

I couldn't get up the guts to directly make eye contact with him (obviously a smile didn't happen either). I don't know what it is about him, but I went on lockdown mode anytime I was near him (such as when I walked in and laid my stuff down on the table he was sitting beside) and didn't directly acknowledge him at all. Snap out of it, mango!! I hate that I'm doing this. I have to stop it.

However, he did have an opportunity to directly acknowledge/smile/talk to me. It was just me, him, and the guy that works there in the gym. He's friends with that guy. I ask the guy who works there if he will put the weights on the squat machine for me (since I can't lift them up onto the machine - I'm not playing weak) and as he is doing so, I ask him why the gym is so empty tonight. I could tell that Mr. X was aware of me, but instead he said something under his breath the guy who works there and apparently it was humorous since they both chuckled. I asked "what?" and the guy who works there said "nothing." The end.

Why oh why oh why oh why oh why am I bringing this onto myself!!!? Him not acknowledging me and acting as if I'm a mute chunk of broccoli makes me feel as if he has zero interest whatsoever, although I have no right to say that since I'm not acknowledging him either thanks to my ridiculous fear of him rejecting him.

This reads like a very cheap soap opera. Good karma for everyone that is still sticking in this thread.

I don't want to be like this toward him, but it's almost as if it's a conditioned response. Please help me. I don't feel like giving up! I'm practically programmed to do my thing until a guy goes out of his way to make a move (not necessarily flirting, but just interaction in general) on me and then I will take the reins. It's as if I can't even take the first step toward a guy I'm instantly attracted to - even something as simple as eye contact and a smile! He probably thinks I'm a stuck-up beyotch.

If it was only the three of you, you totally blew your chance.

However...

Since it was just the three of you and you asked for specific help in that fashion (nothing unacceptable in gym culture) and all he did was make an under-the-breath comment to the other guy, a comment they weren't willing to share with you, it's a sign you might want to reconsider your interest in the guy.

Joking at someone else's expense is common; joking at someone else's unwitting expense when it comes to weights... that's typically reserved for the gym jerks, not the gym rats and regulars. Rats and regulars know everyone has to start somewhere; the jerks sneer at those who aren't on a par with them physically, forgetting they weren't always specimens themselves.

I've no idea what Sizzle is talking about, all this clear indication that the guy wasn't/isn't interested in you; there's been nothing to indicate that so far since you clearly hadn't been around him or acknowledged him yourself. Up to this point there simply hasn't been any contact; ergo, whence the alleged disinterest? Not everyone talks to everyone else in the gym.

Today, however -- different story. Think and do what you want, but I'd take that stuff as a definite negative indication. I could be wrong, he may open up later as a result of this, but I wouldn't hold my breath were I you.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:22 PM
 
Location: Tampa, Florida
13,523 posts, read 16,768,705 times
Reputation: 8474
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jays1983 View Post
Yes.
Amen.

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Old 03-17-2010, 06:24 PM
 
3,284 posts, read 2,427,297 times
Reputation: 1832
Yes, Mango, it's time for you to grab life by the shaft. :-P
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:25 PM
 
Location: Tampa, Florida
13,523 posts, read 16,768,705 times
Reputation: 8474
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jays1983 View Post
Yes, Mango, it's time for you to grab life by the shaft. :-P
Lmao....repworthy.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:25 PM
 
Location: The Mango Tree
2,115 posts, read 4,133,615 times
Reputation: 2624
Quote:
Originally Posted by spinx View Post
You seriously still interested in this guy?

Not only is that really rude, but it's also immature. He sounds like a douche and a half.
That's a definite possibility, but (for the sake of making excuses) he really doesn't act like a jerk at all. He's really friendly and responsive to everyone at the gym - guys, old ladies, old men, etc. I have to be honest and admit that when I'm not making an explicit effort to be friendly or when I go into shutdown mode (as I do around him), I come off as the most arrogant b---- you've ever met. It's not that I'm being stuck-up, it's just my face's natural expression, but of course people don't know that. I didn't even realize I looked like this until my friends and family told me. I'm not exactly the easiest stranger with whom to start a conversation. Yes, I am working on this, but like all habits, it's taking some time.


Wow, I think my age is showing. We all knew this was bound to happen sometime. Naturally, it had to happen over a crush.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:26 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 72,880,256 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by mango tango View Post
Why oh why oh why oh why oh why am I bringing this onto myself!!!?
I'm sorry, honey. I know it's not the greatest consolation, but we all do stupid things... Some of us are not even as brave as you are to share them. And you're SO young! Give yourself a break! Just remember: most likely he'd tell "really awful jokes and quote Jim Carrey movies"! Seriously, I don't think he'd be your type anyway.
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