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Old 03-22-2010, 12:44 AM
 
660 posts, read 904,333 times
Reputation: 373

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Hey......I am male, but coming out of a marriage that failed in part because I do not have the emotional makeup to support a female (LOL!!), and because I am also attracted to men, I am thinking that it would at least be healthy to explore dating with men. My therapist told me that he thought I would find life more fulfilling within the LGBT community.

As far as intimacy goes, I enjoy both men and women, but for whatever reason it has felt more 'intimate' with men. (sigh) Under the sheets, I'm "all girl" if that makes any sense, LOL. All the men that come on to me are so obviously limp-wristed, and most of them are way younger than me (late 30's), it's so frustrating.

How do I find that man that is around my age or older, that is dominant, is a "top" ONLY, and is into males that enjoy expressing femininity? I'm sorry for the mouthful (no pun intended, LOL), but I don't really know where to start with all this.

-COM
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Old 03-22-2010, 03:29 AM
 
Location: San Diego, California
2,496 posts, read 5,751,155 times
Reputation: 1816
This would be better suited for the Relationships forum.
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Old 03-22-2010, 01:30 PM
 
1,469 posts, read 2,423,768 times
Reputation: 961
Well I think you are well on your way with all your "puns" and your "clever" sign off.
I'm pretty sure your questions have been answered already.
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Old 03-22-2010, 01:36 PM
 
13,769 posts, read 12,369,101 times
Reputation: 7848
Quote:
Originally Posted by ColorsOfMe View Post
Hey......I am male, but coming out of a marriage that failed in part because I do not have the emotional makeup to support a female (LOL!!), and because I am also attracted to men, I am thinking that it would at least be healthy to explore dating with men. My therapist told me that he thought I would find life more fulfilling within the LGBT community.

As far as intimacy goes, I enjoy both men and women, but for whatever reason it has felt more 'intimate' with men. (sigh) Under the sheets, I'm "all girl" if that makes any sense, LOL. All the men that come on to me are so obviously limp-wristed, and most of them are way younger than me (late 30's), it's so frustrating.

How do I find that man that is around my age or older, that is dominant, is a "top" ONLY, and is into males that enjoy expressing femininity? I'm sorry for the mouthful (no pun intended, LOL), but I don't really know where to start with all this.

-COM
your just coming out of a marriage, not divorced, but just coming out of a marriage, and already looking to date?????

do you realize the lives you have already hurt...? Because you just now realized you can't support a woman emotionally? I'd say you've got some growing up to do....it's not just about your wants and needs, but about all the lives you've just left behind...you've imprinted them for live, in other words, you've changed they're lives forever, which may mean you've destroyed they're hearts....but hey, you need to get out there and date guys....not men, but guys...?????

there is something very wrong with someone who jumps in and out of relationships...

and I'm wondering if you married and used this girl, b/c you feared coming out of the closet before now, which to me speaks volumns about how very selfish you are....

You need to get counseling...not be in another relationship...with anyone until you realize the hurt you've caused others, and have changed they're lives forever....because you want what you want...

sorry, I'm being honest...and hopefully, you'll get the help you need....before you destroy other lives.
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Old 03-23-2010, 06:05 AM
 
Location: Incognito
6,995 posts, read 13,092,023 times
Reputation: 5306
Where's artsy when youy need him?
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Old 03-23-2010, 06:31 AM
 
13,769 posts, read 12,369,101 times
Reputation: 7848
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Cat View Post
Where's artsy when youy need him?

I have no respect for a person who claims to have been gay, but marry's and even goes as far as having children, then comes out of the closet....

To me anyone who does this is a thief and coward...who cannot be trusted...he is stealing peace and moral obligations from others, those who trusted him with they're hearts...

Being gay is one thing, but using the lives of others to hide behind is unthinkable...

This person has destroyed the lives of his wife, his inlaws, his parents, and most of all, his children if he's had any...

and all he's concerned about is self gratification...how disgusting, how self imposed and uncaring....

This man needs help...he needs to find a good theropist...he's the kind of person who only cares about his own needs and all of his existence, will not be aware of the feelings of others...and will continue to destroy the lives of others...

I'm sorry, to be so direct and honest...but someone needs to wake people like this up...it's not just about him...it's about all the other lives he's affected in a very negative way....he needs to make amends with his own soul and become more aware and he needs to get help....

Jumping in and out of relationships is very unheathy, unthinking and uncaring...it's heartless & destructive to everyone he comes in contact with....He will take all and give nothing back....and this goes for straight people as well....

I have no problem with gays...what I do have a problem with are people who hide behind a family and children, and then one day, come out of the closet and announce they are gay...

Yanno what....what ever happened to dedication to family, loyalty to your marriage vows...loyalty to self...

This person has no respect for himself, therefore, will have no respect for anyone else...and will leave behind a trail of broken hearts....
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Old 03-23-2010, 07:03 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,078 posts, read 8,896,998 times
Reputation: 3620
Quote:
Originally Posted by thepinksquid View Post
This would be better suited for the Relationships forum.

LOL, this IS the relationship forum.
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Old 03-23-2010, 07:05 AM
 
4,384 posts, read 2,055,077 times
Reputation: 1612
find a gay club/bar in your town/city.

or go online and find a gay support group.
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Old 03-23-2010, 07:33 AM
 
18,333 posts, read 17,758,753 times
Reputation: 18479
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
LOL, this IS the relationship forum.
I believe it started in another forum and was moved here.
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Old 03-23-2010, 07:45 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,078 posts, read 8,896,998 times
Reputation: 3620
Quote:
Originally Posted by samston View Post
find a gay club/bar in your town/city.

or go online and find a gay support group.
Agreed BUT more importantly, clean up your house first (your relationship issues at home), you can't and shouldn't be putting yourself into situations to meet others when you haven't finished your current relationship. Hopefully you don't have kids as that would complicate matters but please do this first before you put yourself out there. It's not only fair to your wife, and yourself but a potential mate.
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