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I decided to start a topic on this after thinking about some conversations from people that I've run into through work, school and so forth and because most recently I saw some reruns of the reality/documentary Bravo Network show called Real Housewives of Orange County.
I've come to see that some women officially make it a career to become a trophy wife (or girlfriend). I've met a few that have admitted this to me and feel no need to apologize. Their goal is to be successful by being with a man who is successful and they have studied and observed what it takes to capture such a man. They know what they can do as women and how to manipulate a man.
They know that the first thing that is important is to enhance and preserve their image. It is of premium value. They work out, get necessary cosmetic surgery done, spend above their means or use gift money, never let themselves go or “look average”, wear the best and right clothes, hire hairstylists/manicurists/etc and keep appointments. Again, this becomes a full time job and they make it a point to hang out at all the spots that feature successful and wealthy men...they get to know the right people as well. They might even modify their behavior and become what some call “dumb foxes” - women who appear to be mild, dumb and harmless but have sly and cunning intentions.
They are not concerned with finding the "ideal" love that most people seem to seek because for them again this is a career and they feel this is their only chance to get ahead the way they need to and to be among the elite, the “best people” and most desired zip codes. This is more appealing to attain. There might also be an interest for some to start their own business, get a singing/modeling career in and/or just be around important people who give them a more prestigious status by association.
Some of the women will put up with the husbands cheating on them with other attractive women, in order to give them what they want so that they aren’t replaced for making trouble. This might even include having threesomes because it’s not just looks that are of premium value here, but also what the woman can provide sexually. However, if the woman offers sex in addition to her looks, the more intelligent ones figure out how to ration it all out and not make themselves truly dispensable and/or too common as they know that one of the goals is not to get themselves easily replaced since successful men can often have their pick. They must be desired and seen as valuable to the man at all times.
From some of the women I've talked to (this would be quite interesting for making an indie documentary now that I think of it), some have said that their husbands know the reality and are willing to partake in this unspoken deal because for them, having a trophy wife is an asset as well, it is something that in return increases their pleasure, while others have mentioned that their husbands have no idea that this is their motive and assume that they are genuinely loved and regarded. A few of the latter women also revealed that they have lovers on the side and meet up with them once their husbands are out of town on business trips or away on long hours to work or meetings.
What are your opinions on this type of lifestyle/objective? As a woman, could you see yourself going this route to get what you desired? Why or why not? How do you feel about other women who do this?
Have you also met any women like this? What was your experience like?
I am sure there are men who do the same thing, but in very small numbers, as men aren't able to use their looks as a commodity this way or to this degree. If they do, I notice it will be gay men using rich men or straight, attractive, well built men that will spend their time with women who see the man as a constantly accessible sexual outlet. Do you agree or disagree?
I know of and know a lot of women who fit your idea of a Trophy wife. It's a shallow world, but it does have its perks. I guess a woman have to do what a woman have to do.
This is a tiresome topic. Check my thread on spousal abuse. The girl I know loves being a trophy wife- she is also abused physically and verbally by the loser she is married to.
Driving a Mercedes and living in a mansion on the water is not worth being abused. This is a sick epidemic in our shallow culture.
This is a tiresome topic. Check my thread on spousal abuse. The girl I know loves being a trophy wife- she is also abused physically and verbally by the loser she is married to.
Driving a Mercedes and living in a mansion on the water is not worth being abused. This is a sick epidemic in our shallow culture.
sunny
I agree. Give me my berkinstocks and a good cup of coffee in the morning. My old truck gets me around. I don't need a mercedez and a house on the water. It's a world of emptiness both inside and out.
Trophy Wife is another word for "Gold Digger". What is sad is these women if divorced will put their pursuit of "Mr.Right" before there own children. I could never and would never demean myself that way. What a sad meaningless life.
I agree. Give me my berkinstocks and a good cup of coffee in the morning. My old truck gets me around. I don't need a mercedez and a house on the water. It's a world of emptiness both inside and out.
artie
I couldn't agree more. Who says you're happy (/ier) living in luxury? Isn't life worth more than that?
Personally, I find the small things in life (first snow, first flowers in the spring, my favorite song played on the radio) much more rewarding than expensive jewlery, a nice car, a nice home, etc. I'd rather spend my life living in a tiny house, furnished in a cozy way, with someone I really want to be with, than live in a huge mansion with someone I can't stand being around.
A prositute is still a prostitute now matter how you dress her up or what other label you try to give her. These women are prostituting themselves; how could they not be? They're basically selling themselves to successful men. Ick. No, thank you. Such a "career" would require a lot more self-control than I possess, because I couldn't stand to live that way. Even if you're in a prison that you chose, it's still a prison.
Even if I were young enough and hot enough, I wouldn't choose that life. What happens to these women when they get old - like, say, past 40?! They get traded in for a new "trophy", right? And since most successful men are smart enough to get prenup agreements, the ex-wife has nothing - and now she's aging to boot. Yeah, great plan! I'd rather work for 40 years, live modestly, contribute to my 401(k), and retire with my self-respect intact!
lol- people use a tv show to think thats how these women live- an eye-opener- the trophy wife I know has had plastic surgery, been beaten and cheated on by the loser husband. He laughs and degrades her-she is 40 and he tells her she is ready to be replaced- she weigh 99 lbs and has anorexia- Anyone aspiring to live like this needs major help. Sad that Americans watch and believe this trash.
a.
sunny
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I'd rather work for 40 years, live modestly, contribute to my 401(k), and retire with my self-respect intact!
