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Old 04-08-2010, 05:58 AM
 
32 posts, read 91,744 times
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Default So how long can a person be in Lust

What is the longest time that lust or infatuation lasts?

I have been working at the same place for 5 years and about 2 1/2 years ago I meet someone who also works there (I know taboo) well we have been flirting for all that time and I recently found out he shares the same feelings that I do.

Can infatuation last that long? Or has it turned to something else? I really like him.

You people are great and have good insight so I need to ask.


K-FOX
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Old 04-08-2010, 06:49 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,079 posts, read 8,422,654 times
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You should be talking to him! LOL If you found out that he feels the same way, first, how did you find out? Did he tell someone and then they told you or what? So, ask him to lunch one day. The only way to find out is to talk to him directly. You first need to ask yourself though if you are prepared for the answer. If you ask him to go to lunch and then you find out there may be a relationship possible, are you ready for it? Are you ready in case he says it's just harmless flirtation? You have to mentally be prepared before you blurt something out prematurely. Good luck.
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Old 04-08-2010, 07:07 AM
 
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Maybe about 10 minutes? Depends of friction and lubrication levels.
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Old 04-08-2010, 09:19 AM
 
Location: Dallas, Texas
563 posts, read 985,613 times
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Yes, I think infatuation can last that long provided you never tried to have a real relationship with the person. Once you actually do commit and try to form a partnership, usually the infatuation phase lasts anywhere from 3-6 months up to about 2 years. That is what a lot of psychologists and relationship experts will tell you anyway.

I would say there is a high probability that you are still infatuated with him and nothing more, if you haven't gone beyond flirting and into something more serious/real. Being flirty and nothing more keeps it at an infatuation level, and probably will indefinitely.
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Old 04-08-2010, 11:04 AM
 
Location: The Mango Tree
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The foundation of infatuation is ultimately what has not been. It's the "what if" that keeps infatuation burning. You're not into the person, but rather the idea you have created of that person in your brain. Once you actually get to know the person and start interacting with him/her, infatuation typically dies out because it is replaced with sincere feelings of like or dislike based on what has happened between you and the person.
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Old 04-08-2010, 12:47 PM
 
Location: NC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mango tango View Post
The foundation of infatuation is ultimately what has not been. It's the "what if" that keeps infatuation burning. You're not into the person, but rather the idea you have created of that person in your brain. Once you actually get to know the person and start interacting with him/her, infatuation typically dies out because it is replaced with sincere feelings of like or dislike based on what has happened between you and the person.
I agree with this except I would replace the word dislike with disinterest ...Unfortunately in my case it has been about 95% disinterest.
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Old 04-08-2010, 05:11 PM
 
32 posts, read 91,744 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
You should be talking to him! LOL If you found out that he feels the same way, first, how did you find out? Did he tell someone and then they told you or what? So, ask him to lunch one day. The only way to find out is to talk to him directly. You first need to ask yourself though if you are prepared for the answer. If you ask him to go to lunch and then you find out there may be a relationship possible, are you ready for it? Are you ready in case he says it's just harmless flirtation? You have to mentally be prepared before you blurt something out prematurely. Good luck.
We do talk almost everyday. I found out because a friend of mine at work saw the looks we give each other! LOL I told her I like him so much and she told me you can tell the feeling is mutual! So I asked him, and he said he did! And yes I am ready for a relationship with him. In the 2 1/2 years we have gotten to know each other fairly well, there is mutual respect with each other. We did agree to take it slow (don't think he is ready yet for a relationship he just got out of a bad one). We have not gone on a date yet as this all just happened in the last 2 weeks, and he has been working nights and I work days but we have coffee every morning after he gets off and before I go to work.


I don't know how long he has felt this way, but I have liked him from the first time I saw him. And the more I see him the more I like him! LOL He starts back on days on Monday. So we will see what happens.


K-FOX
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Old 04-08-2010, 05:17 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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There's no time frame. LOL Every situation is unique.
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Old 04-08-2010, 08:30 PM
 
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I am totally attracted to this guy. I sure lust has a great deal to do with it, but I can't seem to turn it loose. I too want to know how long can u be in lust or maybe how long should u allow it? It feels like forever. Good sense says nip it in the bud, but I can't.... Not yet. Well maybe its more... A girl can dream can't she Yeah I know I may have to But, I might not!
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Old 04-09-2010, 07:44 AM
 
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lust lasts until you actually have sex.
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