Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-24-2010, 05:39 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,256 posts, read 8,876,600 times
Reputation: 1848

Advertisements

I've been seeing someone on and off that's Latino. What I'm wondering is if we ended up dating seriously, if the language thing would bother me, given the fact that pretty much all his friends and family are Spanish speaking. Also, I'm wondering if me not speaking the language would be something to hold him back from considering me "relationship material". Any comments?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-24-2010, 05:49 PM
 
Location: Europe, in the Land of the mean
956 posts, read 1,761,201 times
Reputation: 681
It might be one of the factors but likely not a deal-breaker, if all else is fine. But remember that the language quite OFTEN affects a person's view or behaviour, etc though they may not realise it . (I've been VERY CAREFUL not to do something just because that's how it's done back home, in my office,etc ). I like the Latin way and tend to get along with them.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 05:49 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,915 posts, read 18,573,340 times
Reputation: 5524
Well if you've been seeing someone who's a native spanish speaker then they must speak enough english so that you're able to communicate. It could be a problem in certain social situations but if you made an effort to learn some spanish at even a basic level I would think that it would help. Learning a new language is actually pretty difficult, especially for an adult, but it can be done. Besides, speaking a second language can help you to learn about other cultures and be a very practical skill to have, especially in a state like Florida (I'm assuming that's where you live based on your user name). Europeans often speak quite a few languages because they come into contact with people from neighboring countries quite often. There's no reason why Americans can't do the same thing.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 05:49 PM
 
Location: Chicago
38,707 posts, read 102,687,747 times
Reputation: 29966
Sounds like the perfect opportunity to learn Spanish.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 05:57 PM
 
Location: USA
2,110 posts, read 2,583,867 times
Reputation: 1629
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridadreamer View Post
I've been seeing someone on and off that's Latino. What I'm wondering is if we ended up dating seriously, if the language thing would bother me, given the fact that pretty much all his friends and family are Spanish speaking. Also, I'm wondering if me not speaking the language would be something to hold him back from considering me "relationship material". Any comments?
Don't think so, many people in my family are married to Spanish speaking mates. Some of my blood Spanish speaking family is married to non-Spanish speakers as well.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 06:15 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,256 posts, read 8,876,600 times
Reputation: 1848
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gudra View Post
It might be one of the factors but likely not a deal-breaker, if all else is fine. But remember that the language quite OFTEN affects a person's view or behaviour, etc though they may not realise it . (I've been VERY CAREFUL not to do something just because that's how it's done back home, in my office,etc ). I like the Latin way and tend to get along with them.
I realize this is true, even with my ex who is from England. We still have a problem with it to this day, because being "English" he insists the American way of saying things is automatically WRONG.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MontanaGuy View Post
Well if you've been seeing someone who's a native spanish speaker then they must speak enough english so that you're able to communicate. It could be a problem in certain social situations but if you made an effort to learn some spanish at even a basic level I would think that it would help. Learning a new language is actually pretty difficult, especially for an adult, but it can be done. Besides, speaking a second language can help you to learn about other cultures and be a very practical skill to have, especially in a state like Florida (I'm assuming that's where you live based on your user name). Europeans often speak quite a few languages because they come into contact with people from neighboring countries quite often. There's no reason why Americans can't do the same thing.
I hadn't thought about it too much, because I took a lot of Spanish in school and did learn a lot about the culture then. Although I am not at all fluent, I do know a lot of Spanish words, so if I had to I could get a good idea of what is being talked about. So the other evening he was here, and was on his phone forwarding a joke to all his friends. He made a comment that he wasn't sending it to me because it was in Spanish. When I said I do know a lot of Spanish (I have said it before), he more or less dismissed the comment. He didn't do it rudely, just sort of shrugged it off like "who cares".

This was basicly what brought about the thread. I wonder if my not being hispanic or fluent in Spanish, would hold him back from getting serious to the point of introducing me to friends and family, and/or being invited to gatherings like he would with someone that is.

Last edited by floridadreamer; 04-24-2010 at 06:32 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 06:29 PM
 
Location: Where the sun always shines
2,170 posts, read 3,288,279 times
Reputation: 4501
Sounds like a sex only relationship to me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 06:33 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,256 posts, read 8,876,600 times
Reputation: 1848
Quote:
Originally Posted by jacktravern View Post
Sounds like a sex only relationship to me.
If you're going to say something like that, at least explain why. Nothing has been said about sex at all, but I am questioning whether the hesitation would be as strong if I were hispanic.

Last edited by floridadreamer; 04-24-2010 at 06:45 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 07:02 PM
 
21,859 posts, read 19,012,231 times
Reputation: 17970
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridadreamer View Post
I'm wondering if me not speaking the language would be something to hold him back from considering me "relationship material".
a person can learn any language, and Spanish for an American is considered the easiest language of all to learn. What's keeping you from learning Spanish?

If you refuse to learn the language and take no interest in his culture, background, interests, and language, then THAT could well be an obstacle to a serious relationship. If I am interested in someone, then I take an interest in his family and culture. When I dated a Chinese man, I learned Cantonese. When I dated a Dineh' man, I started learning to speak the Navajo language. My son is dating a woman from Venezuela, and he is taking courses to learn Spanish.

Why would you NOT want to learn his language? That is a problem.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-24-2010, 07:11 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,256 posts, read 8,876,600 times
Reputation: 1848
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tzaphkiel View Post
a person can learn any language, and Spanish for an American is considered the easiest language of all to learn. What's keeping you from learning Spanish?

If you refuse to learn the language and take no interest in his culture, background, interests, and language, then THAT could well be an obstacle to a serious relationship. If I am interested in someone, then I take an interest in his family and culture. When I dated a Chinese man, I learned Cantonese. When I dated a Dineh' man, I started learning to speak the Navajo language. My son is dating a woman from Venezuela, and he is taking courses to learn Spanish.

Why would you NOT want to learn his language? That is a problem.
I never said I wouldn't. In fact I said a couple posts above that I do know some spanish already and intend to learn more conversational Spanish. What I should have said, is that I worry my not being hispanic might be an issue for him, even though he speaks English fluently. Based on "his" reaction when I told him that I do know some spanish, I'm not so sure my learning the language would even matter.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top