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Old 05-17-2010, 01:52 AM
 
121 posts, read 113,574 times
Reputation: 71
Quote:
Originally Posted by boodhabunny View Post
> it makes it easier for them

Not really. The receptive woman doesn't get to choose who approaches her. She must wait patiently to be asked out. Once a man approaches her she has the option to either accept or reject the offer but she doesn't have any control over who approaches her.

Men (or the person initiating), on the other hand, get to pick and choose who they ask out. Naturally, they have already decided that the person they ask is attractive and a possible match for them. They never have to deal with the unpleasant task of rejecting an unsuitable offer from an unsuitable person. It's not that easy, if you ask me, to always be on the receiving end.
Lol and you women never have to deal with rejection like men do, which one do you think is worse? Rejecting somebody or being rejected? Women have it way easier than men, you never have to do anything, you never have to initiate anything, you never have to put in any effort in a relationship.
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Old 05-17-2010, 02:03 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 1,346,674 times
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I think being rejected is worse, of course. But I imagine the pain lasts about two minutes, tops.

I have a girlfriend who lost her husband about 5 years ago. She is in her 50s and is average in appearance. She is invloved in many activities and meets many people but she hasn't been asked out on a single date in the five years that she has been available. She is a lovely person but terribly lonely.

I also know of a recent widow. A man in his 60s. He is also average in appearance and in poor health. I just learned that he is getting married! His wife has been gone for less than a year. He obviously had no trouble meeting someone new. Probably because he had the advantage of being the initiator, rather than waiting for someone to ask him out.

Which one is having a harder time finding love again?
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Old 05-17-2010, 02:11 AM
 
121 posts, read 113,574 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boodhabunny View Post
I think being rejected is worse, of course. But I imagine the pain lasts about two minutes, tops.

I have a girlfriend who lost her husband about 5 years ago. She is in her 50s and is average in appearance. She is invloved in many activities and meets many people but she hasn't been asked out on a single date in the five years that she has been available. She is a lovely person but terribly lonely.

I also know of a recent widow. A man in his 60s. He is also average in appearance and in poor health. I just learned that he is getting married! His wife has been gone for less than a year. He obviously had no trouble meeting someone new. Probably because he had the advantage of being the initiator, rather than waiting for someone to ask him out.

Which one is having a harder time finding love again?
It's you women's own fault in that case. If women would take the initiative more often then you would have more of a chance of meeting somebody right?
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Old 05-17-2010, 02:31 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 1,346,674 times
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Well, I don't see her doing that. She believes in old fashioned courtship and romance. As do I. My point being that it is not always the "easy" route to finding love.

So, yes, I suppose it is our own fault. It's the price we pay for not chasing after men. But I am of the opinion that chasing a man is not romantic. I just can't feel romantic passion for a man that I had to chase in order to get his attention. That does NOT make me feel very special. And in order for me to feel intimately close with a man, before I can allow myself to be open and vulnerable, I need to feel special and safe. Sue me.

When a man climbs a mountain, swims an ocean, and slays a dragon for a woman... it's so romantic. But when a woman does those things for a man, it's seen as kind of pathetic and desperate.

I'm just thankful my husband understands this on a primal level and it never had to be explained to him. He treats me like I am his dreamgirl and he wouldn't ever ask me to slay any dragons for him. He is my hero! ***swoon***

Last edited by boodhabunny; 05-17-2010 at 02:56 AM..
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:02 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
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My husband is watching a vampire movie right now. Lots of blood and violence... (yawn) ... hence my attention to this board and the time I'm spending here this evening. I am waiting for the movie to be over and then maybe if I am coy and I dress in something pretty and bat my lashes at him I'll get his attention.

Men are weird. But I love them.
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:03 AM
 
121 posts, read 113,574 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boodhabunny View Post
Well, I don't see her doing that. She believes in old fashioned courtship and romance. As do I. My point being that it is not always the "easy" route to finding love.

So, yes, I suppose it is our own fault. It's the price we pay for not chasing after men. But I am of the opinion that chasing a man is not romantic. I just can't felt romantic passion for a man that I had to chase in order to get his attention. That does NOT make me feel very special.

When a man climbs a mountain, swims an ocean, and slays a dragon for a woman... it's so romantic. But when a woman does those things for a man, it's seen as kind of pathetic and desperate.

I'm just thankful my husband understands this on a primal level and it never had to be explained to him. He treats me like I am his dreamgirl and he wouldn't ever ask me to slay any dragons for him. He is my hero! ***swoon***
Ok. But as a guy I don't really see what's so romantic about me having to do all the work and initiate every contact and every date. I would wonder if the woman even had any intrest in me at all... I got no problem making the first move but if I always had to be the one to initiate everything I would just move on. In your oppinion I'm a wimp for thinking like this right? But how many men do you really think likes it when the woman plays the hard to get game?

To me it just seems like women are selfish, they expect the man to do everything for them and make them feel special. But they are not willing to show their intrest to the man and make him feel special.
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:33 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 1,346,674 times
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I see it this way: The man does all the work during courtship... which usually last about a year or maybe 18 months. After marriage, the woman does all the work which will last for the rest of their lives.

I think a smart man knows that he is getting a really good deal!

Let's face it, after marriage, the lifestyle of the average woman usually spirals downward into an unending pit of drudgery, household chores, child-rearing and oftentimes working full time and contributing 50-50 financially on top of everything else. While the man (the lucky dog) enjoys all the advantages that a wife brings to a household which are too numerous to list in a single post.
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:35 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 1,346,674 times
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Forgive me for being crass but I also thing that because we woman endure monthly cycles in order to carry and deliver your children, the least a man can do is plan a few dates now and then.
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:36 AM
 
392 posts, read 406,382 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boodhabunny View Post

When a man climbs a mountain, swims an ocean, and slays a dragon for a woman... it's so romantic. But when a woman does those things for a man, it's seen as kind of pathetic and desperate.
Pathetic and desperate? Wow. Nothing turns me on more than a woman who's a fighter and protects her man, just as he protects her. To me, there is something INCREDIBLY beautiful about it. I do see some women like that in various movies, series, and anime.

An example of what I mean: http://i71.photobucket.com/albums/i1...rtanxp/f12.jpg

But seeing something like it in real life...would be amazing. Many guys would agree.
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Old 05-17-2010, 03:48 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 1,346,674 times
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Having a woman fighting to protect you is a turn on for you? Wow. How does it feel to know that your girlfriends balls are bigger than yours?
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