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This situation happened 2 years ago and we dont talk about it anymore but i'm still mad..
Living a seemingly happy life with wife for 32 years,have two children, we both work and money has always been put into the household joint accounts Checking and savings,we've always lived frugally and never buy stuff we cant afford so we never carry any debt.
Wifes father passes away and leaves her $500,000 which she promptly puts in a private account that i have no access to and she's not entertaining any idea of spending any of it. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
Last edited by cricket_factor; 05-14-2010 at 06:24 PM..
Sorry, he left it to her, it's her money.
Yes, if you keep going the way you are, and get a divorce because of it, then it's probably matrimonial property, but, until then, you're screwed.
She's probably figured you guys live comfortably enough and don't need it, so has put it away for the kids.
I think that'll make quite a hole in their education fund, don't you ?
Funny how people who make more money are quick enough to shove that fact down your throat when it most suits them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101
Wifes father passes away and leaves her $500,000 which she promptly puts in a private account that i have no access to and she's not entertaining any idea of spending any of it
Sorry, he left it to her, it's her money.
Yes, if you keep going the way you are, and get a divorce because of it, then it's probably matrimonial property, but, until then, you're screwed.
She's probably figured you guys live comfortably enough and don't need it, so has put it away for the kids.
I think that'll make quite a hole in their education fund, don't you ?
Funny how people who make more money are quick enough to shove that fact down your throat when it most suits them.
No divorce is happening due to the money as i'm fairly well off and my parents are unfortunately going to pass away some day and my inheritance will trump hers by 50%, guess where its now going
Here in Quebec inheritances are not matrimonial property and if we split up her inheritance would remain untouchable.As would mine.
Education fund for the kids not needed as education in Canada is Virtually free. Both kids in university $1500 each per year.
As for stating the fact that i make more than her? It would never have come up if she hadnt made the situation of my money is our money and her money is her money so obvious.
This situation happened 2 years ago and we dont talk about it anymore but i'm still mad..
Living a seemingly happy life with wife for 32 years,have two children, we both work and money has always been put into the household joint accounts Checking and savings,we've always lived frugally and never buy stuff we cant afford so we never carry any debt.
Wifes father passes away and leaves her $500,000 which she promptly puts in a private account that i have no access to and she's not entertaining any idea of spending any of it. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
Inheritances are not community property for a reason. What if it were and she died, you inherited and then you remarried making it community property in your second marriage. The money could end up going to your new wife. It's hers. It was left to her by HER father. She decides where it goes from there. Let it go.
I have the same issue. My dh will inherit a sizable sum which will be 100% his. For most of our marriage, I've been the primary bread winner but that has nothing to do with his inheritance. He gets that even if I never earned a dime. It's from his father and will go to his children not his wife.
I get what you're saying. Yeah, it sucks. Everything up till now is share and share alike between the two of you. It's like winning the lottery and telling your husband/wife "OH Well - sucks to be you."
However, I don't know all the laws and legalities of inheritence in Canada and can only speak to your emotions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101
This situation happened 2 years ago and we dont talk about it anymore but i'm still mad..
Living a seemingly happy life with wife for 32 years,have two children, we both work and money has always been put into the household joint accounts Checking and savings,we've always lived frugally and never buy stuff we cant afford so we never carry any debt.
Wifes father passes away and leaves her $500,000 which she promptly puts in a private account that i have no access to and she's not entertaining any idea of spending any of it. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
yes! For 32 yrs i put everything into the joint funds now she gets a windfall and its all hers?
An inheritance is not a windfall like casinos or lottery winnings, its money her father earned. I'm sure you've been a great husband and provider, if you told her you thought she'd used you as a meal ticket as you did here, I wouldn't share either.
The thought of her using me to live up to a certain lifestyle never occurred to me until this turn of events happened, its not about the money its the proverbial principle of the situation, I'm sure had my parents passed away first she would have had no problem enjoying the increased money i would have put in the joint funds.
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. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
