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For men marriage is pointless. The woman will eventually divorce you and take all your money with her and then force you to pay alimony... Men are ALWAYS screwed in divorces... And divorce is unavoidable.
I take it your parents are divorced, Fox? To sum up an argument that comes up often: Everyone is screwed in a divorce. Alimony is rarely awarded, and even more rarely awarded permanently. Divorce is definitely avoidable.
Yeah, sure, the best way never to lose anything is to have nothing.
Clearly, none of us can control the other person's behavior, and so no one can single-handedly eliminate the risk of divorce. But being a good spouse certainly helps -- and that means the following things:
(1)Never taking one's spouse for granted. A marriage can end, you know. It's amazing how many married people simply don't realize this until divorce becomes a reality. They get married and it seems to them, it's now set in stone, so they no longer have to try. A happy and stable relationship evolves over a long time -- but can take only a few minutes to ruin.
(2)Not being cruel. It's not like I have hard statistics, but my hunch is the overwhelming majority of marriages disintegrate simply because of cruelty. Contrary to popular belief, big acts of betrayal, as well as big acts of generosity and self-sacrifice, have less effect on a marriage than the way you treat your spouse every minute of every day. All your efficiency and all your fidelity matter very little if your day-to-day attitude is cold, severe and carping. Small, matter-of-fact displays of affection require very little effort, but go a long way towards maintaining a marriage. Even when it comes to housework, I am sure that it's not doing everything around the house per se that makes certain women resent their husbands to the point of leaving them -- it's the thanklessness of it all, the total lack of appreciation that they get, and the ****ty, entitled attitude. I've never heard a woman say that she left a loving, appreciative, affectionate husband because she felt she was doing too much work; and I've never heard a man say that he left a loving, appreciative and affectionate wife because he was tired of being the sole breadwinner. And thus, one important way to reduce the risk of divorce is to stop treating one's spouse as a means to an end that can be pushed around and barked at.
(3) Being loyal. That means, not merely being faithful, but always supporting your spouse, at least in public, no matter what.
(4) Not using sex or physical affection as a means to punish or to manipulate. That's self-explanatory, I think.
On another note, threads like this always draw people (on this forum, at least, invariably men) who complain that their wives are entirely at fault for their divorces (with the husband's fault, perhaps, being that he was too good a person). I am not sold on this idea. Anyone with two or more gray cells can figure out that with very, very, VERY rare exceptions, it takes two people to ruin a marriage. Perhaps their contributions aren't identical or equal in magnitude, but both are usually at fault. (And sure, I'm saying this as someone who has been divorced.) Every guy who cries about women being flighty and venal presents himself in the best possible light here (which is quite easy, I might add). He is the perfect husband, the model father, a sex god, an excellent provider and an all-around great guy. In reality, people are never so perfect, nor are their breakups ever this clear-cut. You are left wondering: "What could POSSIBLY have been the reason that idiot woman let such a gem slip through her fingers?" And of course, if any of us girls every got to know one of these men in real life, we'd get an idea about the reason pretty soon. Probably several reasons, too.
Is there a men's rights forum? If there is, show me the link. I'd like to sign up.
I think a lot of guys have been pushed past their breaking point by women who feel that whatever the guys give to them, its never enough. I think many men are tired of this entitlement that many women feel is owed to them. I am not speaking for all men, or women, but an awful lot of people that I know who are divorced, myself included, the overriding factor of the divorce was the woman was never satisfied. In fact, it is the reason that so many guys import Russian brides- American women are too demanding. This isn't my opinion, it is a fact.
I haven't given up on American women yet, but the game is getting tiresome.
Yeah, sure, the best way never to lose anything is to have nothing.
Clearly, none of us can control the other person's behavior, and so no one can single-handedly eliminate the risk of divorce. But being a good spouse certainly helps -- and that means the following things:
(1)Never taking one's spouse for granted. A marriage can end, you know. It's amazing how many married people simply don't realize this until divorce becomes a reality. They get married and it seems to them, it's now set in stone, so they no longer have to try. A happy and stable relationship evolves over a long time -- but can take only a few minutes to ruin.
(2)Not being cruel. It's not like I have hard statistics, but my hunch is the overwhelming majority of marriages disintegrate simply because of cruelty. Contrary to popular belief, big acts of betrayal, as well as big acts of generosity and self-sacrifice, have less effect on a marriage than the way you treat your spouse every minute of every day. All your efficiency and all your fidelity matter very little if your day-to-day attitude is cold, severe and carping. Small, matter-of-fact displays of affection require very little effort, but go a long way towards maintaining a marriage. Even when it comes to housework, I am sure that it's not doing everything around the house per se that makes certain women resent their husbands to the point of leaving them -- it's the thanklessness of it all, the total lack of appreciation that they get, and the ****ty, entitled attitude. I've never heard a woman say that she left a loving, appreciative, affectionate husband because she felt she was doing too much work; and I've never heard a man say that he left a loving, appreciative and affectionate wife because he was tired of being the sole breadwinner. And thus, one important way to reduce the risk of divorce is to stop treating one's spouse as a means to an end that can be pushed around and barked at.
(3) Being loyal. That means, not merely being faithful, but always supporting your spouse, at least in public, no matter what.
(4) Not using sex or physical affection as a means to punish or to manipulate. That's self-explanatory, I think.
On another note, threads like this always draw people (on this forum, at least, invariably men) who complain that their wives are entirely at fault for their divorces (with the husband's fault, perhaps, being that he was too good a person). I am not sold on this idea. Anyone with two or more gray cells can figure out that with very, very, VERY rare exceptions, it takes two people to ruin a marriage. Perhaps their contributions aren't identical or equal in magnitude, but both are usually at fault. (And sure, I'm saying this as someone who has been divorced.) Every guy who cries about women being flighty venal presents himself in the best possible light here (which is quite easy, I might add). He is the perfect husband, the model father, a sex god, an excellent provider and an all-around great guy. In reality, people are never so perfect, nor are their breakups ever this clear-cut.
^^^ EXCELLENT POST!! I can't rep ya again right now..........I'm being stingy with sreading the love but I'm putting one on the back burner for you.
many men are tired of this entitlement that many women feel is owed to them. I am not speaking for all men, or women, but an awful lot of people that I know who are divorced, myself included, the overriding factor of the divorce was the woman was never satisfied.
Maybe if you ask the woman, for a change, you'll get a different idea about who's at fault.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Union Federal
In fact, it is the reason that so many guys import Russian brides- American women are too demanding. This isn't my opinion, it is a fact.
I have no doubt that human beings are more demanding than chattel.
I take it your parents are divorced, Fox? To sum up an argument that comes up often: Everyone is screwed in a divorce. Alimony is rarely awarded, and even more rarely awarded permanently. Divorce is definitely avoidable.
Yes my parents are divorced and it was my mother who initiated the divorce. Women aren't ever screwed in divorces because they always initiate the divorce and they get all of the mans money. And no divorce is not avoidable... As I said earlier women can neither love a man that much or that long so it's just a matter of time before she files for divorce.
Is there a men's rights forum? If there is, show me the link. I'd like to sign up.
I think a lot of guys have been pushed past their breaking point by women who feel that whatever the guys give to them, its never enough. I think many men are tired of this entitlement that many women feel is owed to them. I am not speaking for all men, or women, but an awful lot of people that I know who are divorced, myself included, the overriding factor of the divorce was the woman was never satisfied. In fact, it is the reason that so many guys import Russian brides- American women are too demanding. This isn't my opinion, it is a fact.
I haven't given up on American women yet, but the game is getting tiresome.
Import a foreign bride - marry an American one
That says it all... people import goods or marry people. Of course you'll "love & cherish" the property you own more than another equal human being Property doesn't talk back, expect mutual respect and committment.
Is there a men's rights forum? If there is, show me the link. I'd like to sign up.
I think a lot of guys have been pushed past their breaking point by women who feel that whatever the guys give to them, its never enough. I think many men are tired of this entitlement that many women feel is owed to them. I am not speaking for all men, or women, but an awful lot of people that I know who are divorced, myself included, the overriding factor of the divorce was the woman was never satisfied. In fact, it is the reason that so many guys import Russian brides- American women are too demanding. This isn't my opinion, it is a fact.
I haven't given up on American women yet, but the game is getting tiresome.
You sure have a creative definition of the word "fact"...
I have no doubt that human beings are more demanding than chattel.
Chattel? do you mean slavery? what makes you believe that these women are made into slaves? just curious
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