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Old 05-22-2010, 02:36 PM
 
29 posts, read 4,695 times
Reputation: 49
Default I always get a kick out of the people that say "Wait 3 or 4 days to call someone"

after your date? Who comes up with this crap? My wife and I had such a great time on our first date that we arranged the second date while the first date was still going on. People just need to step back, relax , and be themselves. A great date requires no effort, no great thought! Look inside yourself. use your gut. if something doesnt feel right, or if certain issues have to be forced this person isnt the one for you. Im sorry to rant but Im sick of counseling my idiot friend who makes things far more complex than they have to be.
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Old 05-22-2010, 02:43 PM
 
24,032 posts, read 12,995,854 times
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There's a manual, secret code and a class you have to take now before you are allowed to date.
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Old 05-22-2010, 02:47 PM
 
4,892 posts, read 11,425,036 times
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i agree. i think people go on second third and fourth dates "just to see" if their feelings change. or they stay together in volatile relationships for far too long. if it doesnt feel right, you need to move on. that person is not for you. i agree that it should just be simple.
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Old 05-22-2010, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,511 posts, read 11,184,903 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ToniRomo View Post
after your date? Who comes up with this crap? My wife and I had such a great time on our first date that we arranged the second date while the first date was still going on. People just need to step back, relax , and be themselves. A great date requires no effort, no great thought! Look inside yourself. use your gut. if something doesnt feel right, or if certain issues have to be forced this person isnt the one for you. Im sorry to rant but Im sick of counseling my idiot friend who makes things far more complex than they have to be.
I agree with everything but the bolded. Being relaxed and yourself isn't always so easy for everyone, esp if you're shy or introverted. So, it can be quite an effort to make a great date for that reason, in some cases. But, yes, if you want to see each other right away, why wait? Why play games?
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Old 05-22-2010, 03:00 PM
 
Location: Sango, TN
22,636 posts, read 9,636,183 times
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If you call back the next day, it makes the other person think you are to needy.

Women want you to pursue them, but they also want a man that doesn't need them, but wants them. Need comes later.

Thats where the "3 to 4 day" rule came in at. I usually just shoot a quick text, saying I had a good time, the next day.
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Old 05-22-2010, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,511 posts, read 11,184,903 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Memphis1979 View Post
If you call back the next day, it makes the other person think you are to needy.

Women want you to pursue them, but they also want a man that doesn't need them, but wants them. Need comes later.

Thats where the "3 to 4 day" rule came in at. I usually just shoot a quick text, saying I had a good time, the next day.
I think it's as varied as the people dating. If you clique, you clique, why live by someone else's idea of how love should manifest or move along? There are no such rules in love, it only exists in the limitations of man's mind. By man, I mean all people.
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Old 05-22-2010, 03:07 PM
 
29 posts, read 4,695 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Memphis1979 View Post
If you call back the next day, it makes the other person think you are to needy.

Women want you to pursue them, but they also want a man that doesn't need them, but wants them. Need comes later.

Thats where the "3 to 4 day" rule came in at. I usually just shoot a quick text, saying I had a good time, the next day.


A women who is independent and strong yet nurturing and loving ( The kind you want to be with for the long haul) isnt gonna give two craps about a three or four day rule and in fact may get turned off by it if she senses anything less than intellectual honesty. That may work with women with self-esteem issues or dependency issues themselves.
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Old 05-22-2010, 04:07 PM
 
Location: Hawaii
2,058 posts, read 1,672,480 times
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If it works for you not to wait (work meaning, you get what you were going for from the relationship), then yeah call whatever you want (sooner). If the guy (or person, I suppose) quickly loses interest when you call right away, then you should think about why that may be.

Of course it isn't a hard and fast rule, nothing is. Calling early is just something a lot of people seemed to notice didn't work as often.
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Old 05-22-2010, 04:40 PM
 
Location: Astoria, NY
3,056 posts, read 1,204,951 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Memphis1979 View Post
If you call back the next day, it makes the other person think you are to needy.
Nonsense. If I'm really into a guy, I don't care if he calls me within the hour, I want to hear from him (even though I may worry a bit why I was so viscerally attracted to him immediately, maybe there were other things I didn't see/ignored). Then again, if I have a 'meh' attitude towards a guy (95% of my dates) then I'm going to think he's desperate if he calls sooner than I wish to hear from him.
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Old 05-22-2010, 04:44 PM
 
Location: Pa
31,836 posts, read 17,100,867 times
Reputation: 16695
I agree dating rules suck. I say I pay for the date, buy him flowers....and expect to get lucky.......
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