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Old 05-27-2010, 12:24 AM
 
1,994 posts, read 3,203,893 times
Reputation: 1218

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Quote:
Originally Posted by GTOlover View Post
but if it's not a serious relationship yet maybe he is not right for you and it might be better to find someone else that is more communicative and likes to talk things out with you being the good or the bad things.
9 years and counting...
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:28 AM
 
1,994 posts, read 3,203,893 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RazorRob305 View Post
i think you should find a better match VaNiLlA gOrIlLa
Honestly I'd do it right now if I could, it's the aftermath that worries me the most. I have to work up the courage, and yes I know it is taking me way too long but, crap.
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:34 AM
 
Location: Vancouver, B.C., Canada
11,154 posts, read 29,166,040 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa* View Post
9 years and counting...
hmm then well that changes things maybe try and see a realtionship councilor where you can voice your concerns and he can voice his and the councilor can help give advice and you can hear his side and he gets to hear yours without it feeling like drama.
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:41 AM
 
1,994 posts, read 3,203,893 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GTOlover View Post
hmm then well that changes things maybe try and see a realtionship councilor where you can voice your concerns and he can voice his and the councilor can help give advice and you can hear his side and he gets to hear yours without it feeling like drama.
Sadly GTO, I have reached a point where I don't even want to try anymore, I've just had it. It's gotten too hard. I feel like we're strangers living 2 separate lives.

He really is a great person (honestly, I have only mentioned his bad points in my posts, believe it or not he has a lot of good too!), but he is not the person for me.

Right now it's all about coming to terms with how I feel and working up the courage to actually take the big step.
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:54 AM
 
Location: Vancouver, B.C., Canada
11,154 posts, read 29,166,040 times
Reputation: 5479
Quote:
Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa* View Post
Sadly GTO, I have reached a point where I don't even want to try anymore, I've just had it. It's gotten too hard. I feel like we're strangers living 2 separate lives.

He really is a great person (honestly, I have only mentioned his bad points in my posts, believe it or not he has a lot of good too!), but he is not the person for me.

Right now it's all about coming to terms with how I feel and working up the courage to actually take the big step.
then I think you know what you have to do and break up with him. it will suck for a while and be hard at times but in the end it will be for the best for you and him.

anyways goodluck you seem to know where your at with this.
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:56 AM
 
1,994 posts, read 3,203,893 times
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Thanks darlin'.
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Old 05-27-2010, 02:21 AM
 
550 posts, read 1,211,893 times
Reputation: 340
Quote:
Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa* View Post
I don't think you're a prick, Niceguy, but I must say I hate this




ignorant, pigheaded attitude more than anything in the world. It's like if a woman is ever angry it can only mean one thing. If I am ever angry, about anything at all, even if he knows it's something he's said/done that's caused the upset, my bf always asks if I am due. I want to strangle him just a lil bit when he says that.

Ok a lot.
yep but when it's been about 25-30 days since the last total storm and she's all crazy about some petty nothing issue ...you gotta wonder...
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Old 05-27-2010, 06:48 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,688 posts, read 4,998,713 times
Reputation: 7588
Quote:
Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa* View Post
I don't think you're a prick, Niceguy, but I must say I hate this




ignorant, pigheaded attitude more than anything in the world. It's like if a woman is ever angry it can only mean one thing. If I am ever angry, about anything at all, even if he knows it's something he's said/done that's caused the upset, my bf always asks if I am due. I want to strangle him just a lil bit when he says that.

Ok a lot.


You know, I'll agree straight up that men often go to this explanation right away, and really shouldn't.

On the flip-side of that, I think it's kind of like modern lawyers having received a bad reputation, per remarks/jokes like 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. Women vastly resent any suggestion that stringent irascibility might be due to Aunt Flo, yet contrary to popular feminine belief men don't suggest this at EVERY turn of anger or temper, only the ones that seem unjustifiably vehement, abrupt or unreasonable.

In my book that doesn't make it necessarily pig-headed or ignorant, at least not one bit more than women pretending menstruation has NO such effect on their characteristic behaviour.
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Old 05-27-2010, 07:42 AM
 
3,486 posts, read 5,668,944 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Urban Sasquatch View Post
In my book that doesn't make it necessarily pig-headed or ignorant, at least not one bit more than women pretending menstruation has NO such effect on their characteristic behaviour.
Huh?
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Old 05-27-2010, 07:51 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,688 posts, read 4,998,713 times
Reputation: 7588
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca View Post
Huh?

I think you know exactly what I mean. I believe men DO launch to that explanation far too often, and some become so habituated to it they try to toss that laughingly out on the table as though it covers every displeasure any woman may voice -- but for women to pretend men's tendency to go there has NO basis in reality is like leaning over too far backward to avoid falling flat on one's face.

VG stated it as though men are ignorant and pig-headed for saying this, as though we, as men, think this is the ONLY reason women ever get angry, as though we believe there is never justification for women to come to anger -- and I was denying it. That is very specifically what I was addressing.

I'll say it again: Men go there too often, and they need to be more realistic about their evaluation of any woman's anger or outburst. But women get angry at the mention of it (semi-understandably, but not totally) and take things too far in the other direction, as though that's NEVER the cause.

I'm not buying either product.
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