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Old 05-26-2010, 12:50 PM
 
3,408 posts, read 5,139,486 times
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I was just thinking if you find someone attractive, is it much more likely that they are attracted to you?

Some reasons why I think this may be true:
1. If you find out someone likes you, it is more likely that you will be interested in them. I have read studies that prove this and have found this to be the case. People act differently around those they are attracted to and that can be picked up subconsioulsy through eye contact, body language and the persons general behavior. They take it as a compliment and are more likely to like you back, given point 2 below.

2. People tend to go for those who are of similar attractiveness. People who are average learn not to hit on super attactive people because of prior rejections. They learn that they get success with similar people, so their attraction will be to people who are in their league.

So if you find someone that you are interested in, even without saying, there is a far greater chance that they will like you back, compared to someone you are not intersted in. Have you found this to be true or untrue in you life?
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:55 PM
 
Location: South FL
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Quote:
I was just thinking if you find someone attractive, is it much more likely that they are attracted to you?
According to my personal observation, yes.
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:57 PM
 
Location: california
21 posts, read 33,608 times
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untrue. Usually, in the past, if I found out someone was attracted to me, any attraction I felt for them would go away. I dont know why. I think the thought of being in a relationship scared me. But that was in the past. I am currently in a relationship but knowing they were attracted to me when we were just friends played no role in my attraction to them. I'm sure for others it is true but not for me.
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:59 PM
 
Location: Dallas, Texas
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I've found it to be true actually. Interesting topic OP
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:11 PM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,685 posts, read 4,131,037 times
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Generally, no.

While I am attracted to a broad range of physical types of beauty and most certainly do NOT consider the physical to be more important than the mental, I do tend to have certain "types" that I'm attracted to:


I seldom care that much for blondes although there ARE some remarkable exceptions, for which I have no explanation other than I likes what I likes.

I tend more toward TALL women, especially if they have some meat on their bones. I'm not especially tall but I have a broad, stocky build and I'm not intimidated by size.

I like all kinds of coloring (generally) but find I'm more likely to be stopped by the sight of a dark beauty such as (in her day) Sela Ward or the young lady in a recent commercial who greatly resembles Ms. Ward. Or redheads.


But you know who consistently seems to be attracted to me? Short, stocky blondes, over and over and over and over. I don't recall a brunette or redhead ever finding me attractive, not since childhood. I've often wondered about that, whether there are genetic links and predispositions involved.



On the mental side, a few have been attracted to me but mostly I just hear over and over that I'm kind of intimidating, which I really don't understand or necessarily believe. My ex-wife once told me that I tend to have a lot of esoteric knowledge and people resent it. I guess we all have our social failings.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:14 PM
 
Location: South FL
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Quote:
I don't recall a brunette or redhead ever finding me attractive,
There is always time for the first time.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:19 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
21,517 posts, read 22,763,826 times
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Quote:
1. If you find out someone likes you, it is more likely that you will be interested in them. I have read studies that prove this and have found this to be the case. People act differently around those they are attracted to and that can be picked up subconsioulsy through eye contact, body language and the persons general behavior. They take it as a compliment and are more likely to like you back, given point 2 below.
Even Shakespeare knew this--it's the entire plot between Beatrice and Benedick in "Much Ado About Nothing".
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:50 PM
 
951 posts, read 1,565,495 times
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Default Depends on the Reason They are Attracted

Do you tend to be attracted to those who are attracted to you?

Quote:
Originally Posted by FelixTheCat View Post
I was just thinking if you find someone attractive, is it much more likely that they are attracted to you?
This generally hasn't been my experience.

Attraction for most people in their 20s tends to be shallow and based on superficial attributes. Likes attract and the history of the past 40 years has been one of declining marriage rates while more and more, only those with attractiveness and supposedly "good" genes are marrying and having families.

When men are not able to tap into this culture, they often find themselves looking for one last time in their 30s. If they are perceptive, they find that women then are mainly attracted to them for what they can provide - a steady income, some accumulated wealth and posessions, support that they cannot provide for themselves and the status of being married.

Men need to understand that if they aren't attractive to women in their 20s, it doesn't get any better. You can then lose everything if you don't consider this carefully, since they can keep everything that you can provide without having you in the picture.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:53 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
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Quote:
Do you tend to be attracted to those who are attracted to you?
No, and that seems to be the problem. I don't have the slightest attraction for the carnival workers and social misfits who seem to be attracted to me. When I see a woman I am attracted to and she notices that I'm looking in her direction she will normally make a gesture with her middle finger which I have come to realize means that she's probably not interested or attracted to me.
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Old 05-26-2010, 02:01 PM
 
Location: My Private Island
4,941 posts, read 7,096,050 times
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Do you tend to be attracted to those who are attracted to you?

Nope!
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