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Old 05-27-2010, 01:55 PM
 
Location: Metro DC area
4,501 posts, read 1,853,964 times
Reputation: 1243
Default How do white guys approach women they find attractive?

OK..I’m married, so have no vested interest but to satisfy my curiosity…..

How do white guys approach women they find attractive? I’m Black, so I’m used to the direct approach: guy sees me, approaches me, asks my name, etc., etc……from white guys, I see that they look at me and are what I consider interested, yet they don’t do anything. I’m in the Metro DC area, so I’m mainly talking about how you would approach a female if you’re in the subway, on a bus, on the street vs. in a bar where it’s “easier”. Is it just that there’s an intimidation factor in approaching a black girl that you find attractive?

Please satisfy my curiosity? J

 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
8,860 posts, read 10,840,982 times
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Honestly, I think a lot of white men just assume that most black women aren't interested in them, and so they tend to shy away or not approach them as often even though they may be attracted to them.

For the white men who will approach you, not all will use the same approach, some may be forward and direct, some may try to find some common denominator to open up conversation, some may play a little cat & mouse game and hope you give them the green light to approach you. All depends.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:03 PM
 
3,184 posts, read 2,107,626 times
Reputation: 4021
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChocLot View Post
OK..Iím married, so have no vested interest but to satisfy my curiosityÖ..

How do white guys approach women they find attractive? Iím Black, so Iím used to the direct approach: guy sees me, approaches me, asks my name, etc., etcÖÖfrom white guys, I see that they look at me and are what I consider interested, yet they donít do anything. Iím in the Metro DC area, so Iím mainly talking about how you would approach a female if youíre in the subway, on a bus, on the street vs. in a bar where itís ďeasierĒ. Is it just that thereís an intimidation factor in approaching a black girl that you find attractive?

Please satisfy my curiosity? J
And mine. I have plans to "expand my dating horizons" in the near future.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:05 PM
 
Location: I'm not lost, I'm exploring!
3,403 posts, read 9,151,424 times
Reputation: 5606
What does race have anything to do with, with asking out a ... married woman, did you say?

It is my uneducated opinion, that any color man will advance communication with any color woman, granted that they are "interested" in them for one reason or another. Striking up a meaningful (or memorable) conversation while packed onto a hot sweaty subway full of people - or hopping buses across town, however, may not open up the broadest avenue of opportunity, no matter the level of intimidation projected.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:17 PM
 
Location: Metro DC area
4,501 posts, read 1,853,964 times
Reputation: 1243
Quote:
What does race have anything to do with, with asking out a ... married woman, did you say?
No, I'm saying I'm married now, so I'm just asking out of curiousity.

Quote:
It is my uneducated opinion, that any color man will advance communication with any color woman, granted that they are "interested" in them for one reason or another. Striking up a meaningful (or memorable) conversation while packed onto a hot sweaty subway full of people - or hopping buses across town, however, may not open up the broadest avenue of opportunity, no matter the level of intimidation projected.
I don't find this to be true. In my personal experience, before marriage, white guys would look interested, make eye contact and I could tell they were checking me out, but they wouldn't approach. I just got the vibe that they were self-conscious/insecure. BUT, I also see white guys checking out white girls, but it's only that...staring, with no approach. Do white guys not approach women on the street/out in public that they find attractive? Does it always have to be in a social setting (bar, club, party, etc)?
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:26 PM
 
Location: I'm not lost, I'm exploring!
3,403 posts, read 9,151,424 times
Reputation: 5606
I think that the majority of men have gotten soft. Or lazy. I blame the internet, and the vast social media proclaiming to "never settle", "dont' compromise your values" - which turns into inflexibility period. If something your partner does rubs you the wrong way - ditch them, find yourself, reinvent yourself, you deserve better! after all, with 3 million people in just a 30 minute radius to your doorstep, why are you wasting one more minute of your life when there are oodles of someones you haven't tried out yet!

Why try so hard and work up the nerve to ask a girl out face to face and risk rejection in public, when there's an entire world population at your fingertips once you get home. *sigh* You're lucky any of them even make eye contact with you anymore.

Besides, at a bar/club/social setting, it's "Acceptable" to introduce yourself to someone you find interesting. It's kinda the reason the majority of them are there. If you approach someone on the street, you can quickly be determined as creepy, homeless, psycho, or stalker! It must be a tough life indeed for the nice guy out there.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Houston, TX
15,514 posts, read 15,154,703 times
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I walk up and introduce myself or I have the bartender send them a drink.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:34 PM
 
3,458 posts, read 1,475,404 times
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it has to do with your target. you do what works.

upper middle class white girls don't respond to the sort of assertiveness that many black guys put forth. white people need to be assertive but it is a little bit different.

maybe if you live in some racially integrated bizarro world, it works differently. where i am from is highly segregated with a black majority, and there are cultural mores that apply to different races.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:38 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,917 posts, read 11,365,845 times
Reputation: 5294
Although interracial relationships and marriages have become commonplace I suspect that many white guys might still be apprehensive about approaching a black woman because they're unsure whether or not their race will be an issue. I see a lot of nice looking black women in Nashville although I've never approached any of them. I'm definitely open to that possibility though.
 
Old 05-27-2010, 02:41 PM
Ep-
 
2,015 posts, read 2,231,560 times
Reputation: 2272
i would see her, approach her,, ask her name, etc., etc
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