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Old 06-10-2010, 12:09 AM
 
3,592 posts, read 4,171,557 times
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Unless it's related to love or affection, or sex, no one should be putting their hands on anyone. And only with their partners permission.

I've heard this crap from men like, "If she hits me, I'm gonna hit her back to prove I'm not weak or a p**nk." Proceed at your own risk and assume that once you hit her, she will want the relationship to be over. If that's cool with you, bring on the consequences.
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Old 06-10-2010, 02:32 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,487 posts, read 3,775,961 times
Reputation: 6843
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
Unless it's related to love or affection, or sex, no one should be putting their hands on anyone. And only with their partners permission.


"I love you, Morticia. May I place my arms about you in a display of emotion bubbling over into physical affection?"

"Have you submitted the forms in triplicate and outlined the specifics of where you intend to place your hands, Gomez?"

"I've got it on file down at the courthouse now, cara mia. I've even got another prepared for tomorrow in case the feeling arises."

"Are the copies with my lawyer, mon petit chou-chou?"

"I believe so, my dulcet roc!"

"I haven't reviewed them yet, you know..."

"Curses! Well, perhaps later."


I hope you never list spontaneity as one of your "desirable traits" for a partner! I can hear it now:


I loved him; he was so bubbly and spontaneous, which endeared him to me. Shame I had to have him locked away for fondling my breast...
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Old 06-10-2010, 03:29 AM
 
1,571 posts, read 2,245,860 times
Reputation: 636
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
Unless it's related to love or affection, or sex, no one should be putting their hands on anyone. And only with their partners permission.

I've heard this crap from men like, "If she hits me, I'm gonna hit her back to prove I'm not weak or a p**nk." Proceed at your own risk and assume that once you hit her, she will want the relationship to be over. If that's cool with you, bring on the consequences.
They're contradicting themselves and in fact they are still weak p**nks.. even more.
And yes the relationship will be over in seconds as well the initial feelings going from love to total indifference.
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Old 06-10-2010, 06:21 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
14,940 posts, read 20,994,562 times
Reputation: 16358
I'm quessing your going to keep throwing scenarios out there until I finally condone violence....

Moving from school to school, would only reinforce his fears and teach him you run when you can't solve problems. Maybe something to build his confidence is in order, kids with self confidence are less likely to be bullied.

These situations don't fly any more, not even grammer school. I personally know of 2 seperate situations, child1.. 10yrs old, fingerprinted and questioned by the state police over an altercation on the school bus(girls btw)the parents wanted to press charges.

2nd situation, high school girl 17, my neice. Stopped going to school bc she was afraid of a group of girl bullies harassing her. Harassment charges were filed against each girl, the kids and their parents, all in court, the judge put the girls on probation. Never another word.

The school wasn't involved in either situation, but the first course of action to remedy, to no avail. When parents have no choice but to get involved and have to face a judge in court bc of their kids and don't want their own reputations damaged, the craps got away of stoping real fast.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Urban Sasquatch View Post
Actually, no -- I'll make it simple. Let's look at the schoolyard bully, the earliest version of the bully.

They get away with it so very much of the time. How is that?

Such people learn to keep an eye on the teacher fairly early on. They pick out their targets, they wait for times when authority figures are otherwise occupied; they select places at least moderately off the beaten path -- bathrooms during classes, after school sessions. They pick crowded halls as classes are changing and the ways are packed.

You're trying to figure out Pre-Algebra, they're slicing up their math book and eyeballing you for the best places to punch you for maximum effect.

They resort to ridicule and quite often even greater harrassment if a student attempts to report them, let alone if anything actually sticks. Often it just boils down to perpetual warnings as "his-word-against-my-word" amounts to little; principles murmur "Well, if anything is happening and I catch it..."

A big, fat zero.

We're supposed to act as role models for our children and certainly supposed to teach them that violence is to be avoided. So where does that fit in schoolyard rules?

Son, we've already moved you to three different schools, so all I can say is you need to learn to take a beating like a man until you grow up and go to college, so that Biff is washing your car someday...

Why can't I just fight back, dad?

Because son, fighting is WRONG for ANY reason; there's always another way, even if we have to move to Greenland. Maybe the Inuit will like you better. If they start beating you up too, well... your mother and I have been discussing a moral euthanization -- for your own good, you understand...
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Old 06-10-2010, 07:16 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,487 posts, read 3,775,961 times
Reputation: 6843
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode View Post
I'm quessing your going to keep throwing scenarios out there until I finally condone violence....

Moving from school to school, would only reinforce his fears and teach him you run when you can't solve problems. Maybe something to build his confidence is in order, kids with self confidence are less likely to be bullied.

These situations don't fly any more, not even grammer school. I personally know of 2 seperate situations, child1.. 10yrs old, fingerprinted and questioned by the state police over an altercation on the school bus(girls btw)the parents wanted to press charges.

2nd situation, high school girl 17, my neice. Stopped going to school bc she was afraid of a group of girl bullies harassing her. Harassment charges were filed against each girl, the kids and their parents, all in court, the judge put the girls on probation. Never another word.

The school wasn't involved in either situation, but the first course of action to remedy, to no avail. When parents have no choice but to get involved and have to face a judge in court bc of their kids and don't want their own reputations damaged, the craps got away of stoping real fast.

You know, you make the mistake of believing that I condone violence. I most assuredly do not.

I just don't live in a fantasy world where violence doesn't exist as a solution simply because it shouldn't be the FIRST solution.

As far as me "throwing scenarios out there" -- therein lies the rub: There will always be variations on a theme, will always be little differences here and there which DO -- much as I might wish otherwise -- call for some degree of violence.

I don't get irritated with people who say violence shouldn't be the answer; I don't get irritated with them because it shouldn't be the answer.

Only now we're back to people as a whole being smarter and more moral and the fact that it's NOT going to happen and therefore NOT going to always be the answer.

People who think violence is NEVER, EVER the answer and who proudly proclaim it from the mountaintops with a holier-than-thou smugness are as blatantly lacking in understanding of human nature as are the idiots who want a punch in the jaw to be the answer to everything.

Teach hypothetical kid something confidence-building like... oh, I dunno... martial arts, maybe? Various martial arts ARE excellent confidence-builders and the core pursuit IS self-control; but you'll note they're all centered around the word martial, and there's a reason for that. It's because martial arts, especially the Eastern varieties, teach that we seek another way as often as possible, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty we sometimes hit back.

Further, do you see the eventual Big Picture coming down the pike with regard to your 10-year-olds on the bus and the need to have the authorities step in? We rely on authorities to solve each and every problem down to childhood squabbles these days. Am I the ONLY one who fears someday the authorities will be telling us how we may and may not parent even more than they already are?

We're wimping ourselves into an inescapable corner where the Eloi find themselves eaten.
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Old 06-10-2010, 07:47 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
14,940 posts, read 20,994,562 times
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Now you're assuming, I know your stand on violence, but present hypothetical situations as though I'll change mine.

EDIT....
BTW, sports are great confidence builders.
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Old 06-10-2010, 08:58 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,487 posts, read 3,775,961 times
Reputation: 6843
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode View Post
Now you're assuming, I know your stand on violence, but present hypothetical situations as though I'll change mine.

EDIT....
BTW, sports are great confidence builders.

Indeed they are -- so long as you're a winner, which takes a certain amount of aggression in most sports. Football, for example; all the pads in the world can't prevent every injury in a sport where the answer IS if he still pushes back, hit him harder. Knock him down, take the wind out of him, stomp the enemy -- THEN you're a winner!

Tennis, anyone?

You're losing! HIT that ball back over there! Knock it down her throat!

Basketball?

Is there a coach alive who doesn't teach fair play BUT also teach the "insider's list of dirty tricks", assuming they aren't teaching aggression in the first place?


We're left with golf, bowling and badminton, I suspect, in our world of mixed messages and confused signals.
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Old 06-10-2010, 09:09 AM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
14,940 posts, read 20,994,562 times
Reputation: 16358
How did I know you'd have come back
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Old 06-10-2010, 10:25 AM
 
437 posts, read 561,001 times
Reputation: 353
I'm not a big fan of hitting anyone but, as Chris Rock says, ain't no one above an ass whupping! There's a reason to hit a woman; just don't do it! Heck, there's a reason to kand the man hits back, we all know who the cops are arresting.

Act like a man, get treated like a man. Act like a lady, get treated like a lady: there is your equality right there.

As for the woman who didn't want to leave, just pick her up and toss her out of the house. I would not recommend calling the cops because she can claim abuse by you and, especially in must arrest states, YOU as the homeowner could be arrested and barred FROM YOUR OWN HOME and she be allowed you live there.

Life has gotten nutty and it's just going to get worse. It is going to be interesting as more women and less men work: the burden will fall more and more on women to keep this nation running and defended. Many of the unglamorous/dangerous jobs like sewage maintainence, mining, law enforcement, and the armed forces will fall more upon the "gentler" sex, a gender that has never in history been able to run an independent society.
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Old 06-10-2010, 10:29 AM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,487 posts, read 3,775,961 times
Reputation: 6843
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode View Post
How did I know you'd have come back

Because I try to look at ALL sides of issues?

That's my guess regarding how you knew...
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