Nice way to get mormons to leave us alone? (Buddhist, Buddha, church)

[norcalmom101]

Looking for serious and effective strategies for nicely getting the mormons in our small town to leave us alone, not the friends and family members, but the ones clearly assigned to us, who are driving me ballistic by trespassing to proselytize.

[imbobbbb]

Well the missionaries are not going to be 'from' your town.How often do they actually come by?Is your property posted against trespassing and soliciting?Is your front yard fenced and equipped with a large dog?I suppose if its really as big and frequent a problem as you let on you could post a 'no mormons allowed' sign too.Perhaps paint a 2 foot reversed pentagram on your front door.You could just not answer the door.When they ask if they can talk to you you could just say no,{of course they are frequently rotated out so the new batch wont know who has said no and who hasnt].I guess if its that frequent a burden for you you will have to handle it in a less polite way then you have...or deal with it.

[norcalmom101]

loved your answer. "no mormons allowed" lmao but then I wouldn't get my mail ; ) I'm gonna look up the reversed pentagram, that might help.

[chielgirl]

If you answer the door naked, they get embarrassed and walk away.

Also, a pitcher of cold water can do the trick since NO doesn't work.

[LogicIsYourFriend]

Answer the door. "Would you like to come in for some coffee and sex?"

bible salesman: "er um... uh...?"

You: "What you don't like coffee?"

[grannynancy]

I did once shut one up by saying
So you say that you will reach out to me in the afterlife and show me the way THEN?
They said - yes.
So I said "see you then" there was not a programmed response to that one.

UH, I have also said "I am a Christian" "I already have a church" "I don't want to talk"

Be nice to them; they are just kids.

[GCSTroop]

Tell them you're not interested unless you can do the polygamy part because you find the interaction with one man and a large group of women to be highly erotic.

But, I like chielgirl's idea as well. Hmmm.... Perhaps I should dress up as a Mormon and start going door to door???

[Morale Officer]

Tell them you are a Jehova's Witness and ask if they'd like to be converted. lol

[esselcue]

I have a large statue of a laughing Buddha that is quite visible from the front door. I usually just point to that, smile and then close the door. I am not a Buddhist, per se, but the Mormons have no idea.

[SuSuSushi]

Rottweilers. Big, vicious, hungry Rottweilers. And name them things like "Beelzebub" and "Mephistopheles".