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07-06-2009, 08:42 AM
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Nothing Is Sacred
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Wishing to be elsewhere
3,020 posts, read 1,384,453 times
Reputation: 1517
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdbrich
Don't do the deed then. It's simple, really.
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Yes, be a frozen fish fillet!
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07-06-2009, 08:44 AM
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Not a member
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Join Date: Feb 2008
4,678 posts, read 1,282,319 times
Reputation: 409
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Visvaldis
Yes, be a frozen fish fillet!
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That's ultimately what it comes down to, isn't it? People don't like to live by what God has commanded.
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07-06-2009, 08:58 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: May 2009
714 posts, read 149,414 times
Reputation: 249
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdbrich
That's ultimately what it comes down to, isn't it? People don't like to live by what God has commanded.
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Which God?
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07-06-2009, 09:10 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Victoria, BC.
7,506 posts, read 2,960,314 times
Reputation: 2634
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdbrich
Don't do the deed then. It's simple, really.
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The curious want to know...Did you do the deed before marriage, or are your rules just for others?
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07-06-2009, 09:28 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Dec 2007
207 posts, read 32,659 times
Reputation: 23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puddy4LyF
Idealistic any?
In a vaccum, of course abstinence is the most ideal way to prevent many of the issues you talked about. However, life isn't played out in a vaccum and there's a funny thing about abstinence: essentially, that it works until it doesn't.
People who are going to have sex also need to learn how to have it safely, because that's what they/we're going to do. And when education which speaks of abstinence-only doesn't also teach other ways, then they are now causing many of the problems you talked about.
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You use the word 'idealistic' as if it were synonymous with 'impossible'.
It's not.
But it takes effort on the part of the parents to teach kids the right way, and frankly most of them are too lazy and too interested in justifying their previous behavior.
They are afraid their kids will ask 'well, did you do it?'
What's wrong with answering 'yeah I did, and it was a dumb thing to do.'?
It's much easier to let them get their 'sexual education' from watching sitcoms and movies.
If you want your kids to grow up to be as messed up as their favorite Hollyweird celebrities, that's a great plan.
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07-06-2009, 09:45 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: East Bay, CA
921 posts, read 476,633 times
Reputation: 449
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Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est la vie
You use the word 'idealistic' as if it were synonymous with 'impossible'.
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No, I used 'idealistic' as synonymous with not being realistic, which it isn't. An animalistic instinct is to fornicate. Are we also programmed for monogamy? Why, yes we are. However, even that being the case, most humans have had sex with multiple humans in their lifetimes and most humans (even Christians) have had sex under the guise of being single.
To deny that this has always happened and will always happen is the exact same ignorance which causes many of the plagues the OP talked about. You can teach your children abstinence all you want, and it's not a bad idea at all - in fact, I will be doing something similar. However, my children will also know about STD's, birth control, condoms and pregnany, etc.
The difference is that when a child who is taught ONLY abstinence finds themselves in a position (which they will) where they will have sex, what knowledge do they have? Will they use a condom? Are they on birth control? Like I said, Abstinence works until it doesn't.
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07-06-2009, 10:01 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Dec 2007
207 posts, read 32,659 times
Reputation: 23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puddy4LyF
.....when a child who is taught ONLY abstinence finds themselves in a position (which they will) where they will have sex.....
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Do they suddenly have no control over their actions, like a car which has hit the curb and careens out of control?
'ooops my pants fell down and I'm next to my gf and hers did too. I guess it's gonna happen! Now what do I do, my parents taught me abstinence!'
Give me a break. Do people inexplicably lose their freewill?
Is sexual attraction so strong that one has no control over it? (If so, we may need to revise laws regarding rape, child molestation, etc)
How does one 'find themselves' suddenly thru no choice of their own in a position where 'they will (unavoidably) have sex'?
Don't be ridiculous.
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07-06-2009, 10:16 AM
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Not a member
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Join Date: Feb 2008
4,678 posts, read 1,282,319 times
Reputation: 409
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sanspeur
The curious want to know...Did you do the deed before marriage, or are your rules just for others?
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Nope. I didn't. Neither did my wife. We had every opportunity to, but chose to wait.
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07-06-2009, 10:25 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Dec 2007
207 posts, read 32,659 times
Reputation: 23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puddy4LyF
Like I said, Abstinence works until it doesn't.
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Yeah, and honesty works until it doesn't.
'ooops I suddenly robbed the convenience store. My parents only taught me not to. Now what do I do?'
lol
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07-06-2009, 10:31 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: East Bay, CA
921 posts, read 476,633 times
Reputation: 449
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Quote:
Originally Posted by c'est la vie
Do they suddenly have no control over their actions, like a car which has hit the curb and careens out of control?
'ooops my pants fell down and I'm next to my gf and hers did too. I guess it's gonna happen! Now what do I do, my parents taught me abstinence!'
Give me a break. Do people inexplicably lose their freewill?
Is sexual attraction so strong that one has no control over it? (If so, we may need to revise laws regarding rape, child molestation, etc)
How does one 'find themselves' suddenly thru no choice of their own in a position where 'they will (unavoidably) have sex'?
Don't be ridiculous.
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There are so many factors which reason that humans should know MORE about sex than simply waiting until marriage. I don't know if you've been in a cave for the past forty years, but in case you have, I'll help fill you in:
1. Many men and women today have no desire to be married. (Not to mention those who are unable to be married)
2. Many, many men and women have no desire for your religion or its antiquated notions of sexuality and relationships.
a) believe it or not, we don't all base our morals off of waiting to marriage. Others consider love more important.
3. I think you need a beginner's course in evolution and how human sexuality evolved. You are currently sniping at me because I said that sex was a primitive act/emotion and you're quipping in return that we shouldn't react until marriage.
- You should know that marriage wasn't an evolutionary trait passed from our ancestors. Monogamy was, but marriage wasn't. It's a man-made institution. If you want to have a conversation about monogamy, then that's easy. The smartest idea is to wait until you're in love and with the right person before you fornicate. Some don't do that; most do. For those who do AND don't, it's definitely a good idea to know how to put a condom on and how to swallow birth control.
This conversation has quickly turned into an elementary, base look into how one Christian sees the world through the eyes of their own, life-long beliefs.
In summary, this is how I have acted in my life and how I will project relationships to children: I had sex 5 years before I would be married (next week), and it was all with 1 person. (We've been together for 6 years). We waited until we were in love and we used condoms and birth control for much of those years. We have 0 children (unless you consider our cats children). Oh yeah, and it was glorious. =P This is smart. Do you think it's immoral? If you do, you need to start seeing the world through a different set of raybans. 
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