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This came up yesterday on one of the threads about forgiving a spouse after adultery. What do you classify as an "emotional affair?" What is the difference between a casual friendship with the opposite sex and "Houston, we have a problem..." When does a relationship or friendship with someone of the opposite sex begin to take away from what belongs to your spouse or does it in your opinion?
I frankly think that fallling into this type of situation may actually be more of a temptation for committed Christians than a full-blown physical affair because it can be gradual and insidious. Sometimes even ministry situations with the opposite sex can get dicey...either ministering to someone or ministering in a situation with them. Do you and your spouse have any particular boundaries or guidelines you observe in your friendships and dealings with the opposite sex?
Or do you just think that kaykay has lost her mind and/or situations like that only occur in Texas?!
Kayay..I once had a preacher of another religion chase me around and around a bed-chair in my daughters hospital room, because he wanted to give me a hug, and I didn't want him to..So round and round we went..He was older than me so got tired of the chase before I did..I wonder if that would be considered an emotional affair
Kayay..I once had a preacher of another religion chase me around and around a bed-chair in my daughters hospital room, because he wanted to give me a hug, and I didn't want him to..So round and round we went..He was older than me so got tired of the chase before I did..I wonder if that would be considered an emotional affair
Blue, I don't know WHAT I would call that, exactly!!! Good thing the hadn't just read the scripture that talks about greeting the saints with a "holy kiss!"
No one is above "falling" for someone else. That's why when I have an attraction to someone I identify it immediately (to myself anyway). Then I don't get caught up in the fantasy of the "grass is greener". And I can use extra caution with this person (like no lunch dates or anything where I will be alone with them)
My relationship with my husband comes first, he is my rock, he has been with me through the good, bad and the ugly. If we happen to not "make it" than I know that I can walk away with clean hands and a "pure" heart.
I've seen this situation happen in the workplace firsthand and that's probably one of most likely places that it will occur. If you're spending fourty hours a week in close proximity to other people it's only natural that you're going to develop certain bonds. I do think it would be a very gradual thing and would start out very innocently but as people start to share more and more of their personal lives with a coworker at some point they often develop what you describe as an emotional affair. Working in an office is the perfect environment for this type of thing because men and women are working side by side and when you add up how much time a husband and wife are together it's probably not much different than the amount of time you might spend with a coworker. One of my female supervisors from quite a few years ago came to work on a Monday morning and informed everyone that she had married a guy in our group over the weekend and they'd just come back from Nevada. At first no one believed it but it was true and they had managed to keep their budding romance a secret for months. Everyone was just floored but at least they were both single. The same thing happens all the time when one or both of them are married.
I think it truly depends on where you draw the lines concerning certain relationships. For instance, I have several female friends with which we are extremely close. We've known each other for many years, have a deep attachment to each other, miss each other when we're not around, and interact in a way to which an outside observer would think that there is "something going on" - but there isn't. We are just close friends who care deeply about each other but doesn't mean we're knocking boots or contemplating marriage.
It all depends on what you and your spouse see as acceptable interactions with others and what you don't - another instance where clear communication in a relationship which is very important.
I've seen this situation happen in the workplace firsthand and that's probably one of most likely places that it will occur. If you're spending fourty hours a week in close proximity to other people it's only natural that you're going to develop certain bonds. I do think it would be a very gradual thing and would start out very innocently but as people start to share more and more of their personal lives with a coworker at some point they often develop what you describe as an emotional affair. Working in an office is the perfect environment for this type of thing because men and women are working side by side and when you add up how much time a husband and wife are together it's probably not much different than the amount of time you might spend with a coworker. One of my female supervisors from quite a few years ago came to work on a Monday morning and informed everyone that she had married a guy in our group over the weekend and they'd just come back from Nevada. At first no one believed it but it was true and they had managed to keep their budding romance a secret for months. Everyone was just floored but at least they were both single. The same thing happens all the time when one or both of them are married.
Yeah, MG, I've seen it firsthand too, except in a church scenario. That's why I have interest in the subject.
Sometimes I think people think that they are such strong Christians, they could never be tempted this way and then they are.
When I worked in the office environment Isaw this as well. One of my very best friends is male,come to think of it, he lives in Texas! Whenever he comes home, we often go out to eat,my husband does not mind one bit. He just does not want to go out with us. My friend is gay so hubby has no worries. I went to school with my friend and we have been friends for over 25 years.
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When does a relationship or friendship with someone of the opposite sex begin to take away from what belongs to your spouse or does it in your opinion?
