Is Masturbation A Sin? (Old Testament, best, different, before)
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A person born of the Spirit who masturbates for sexual gratification is a spirit playing with the flesh of a man, plain and simple. However, the practice of maintaining a healthy prostate is no sin.
Having sex 20 times a month is being oversexed? REALLY? I thought that was quiet normal.
It IS unusual. That is more or less daily sex with an occasional skipped day. That is not reality for most couples. The figures I have heard are 2 or 3 times a week, and I'm suspicious that even that is overreported because people don't want to admit to themselves that they don't have as much sex as they would like. You are almost describing "sex whenever I want it" which almost never happens, at least not for men. Nor does it jibe with the reality of everyday existence, where you are often too exhausted or distracted or anxious to have a mental state that is really conducive to sex AND intimacy. Where communication with you partner is far too dicey and fraught with opportunities for disconnect to be conducive to sex AND intimacy all that often.
In any case, these statements apply to quantity, not quality. Personally, I have had 2 or three sexual experiences in my entire life that were approaching anything that resembles an ideal in my mind. You know, the kind where both people were matched in desire and emotional connection, and ended up being completely satisfied both physically and emotionally afterward, and which now serve as fond wistful memories of What Might Have Been in my dotage. The "brass ring" that everyone reaches for and wishes they could have each and every time -- and which, before you had any actual sexual experiences, you imagined sex would BE like.
Good for you that you actually think 20+ times a month is "normal". Truly. Triple good for you if your partners could keep up and felt similarly. You probably don't know how lucky you are.
Location: In a little house on the prairie - literally
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mordant
It IS unusual. That is more or less daily sex with an occasional skipped day. That is not reality for most couples. The figures I have heard are 2 or 3 times a week, and I'm suspicious that even that is overreported because people don't want to admit to themselves that they don't have as much sex as they would like.
20 is really not that excessive if you consider how often there are multiple engagements in some days, in most cases weekend, but not necessarily. How frequent are evening encounters, followed by early morning ones? That makes up for the skipped ones for sure.
Quote:
You are almost describing "sex whenever I want it" which almost never happens, at least not for men. Nor does it jibe with the reality of everyday existence, where you are often too exhausted or distracted or anxious to have a mental state that is really conducive to sex AND intimacy. Where communication with you partner is far too dicey and fraught with opportunities for disconnect to be conducive to sex AND intimacy all that often.
Most of my partners are as willing as myself. I have found women in their late 50's and early 60's have as little inhibition as men do, and often have libidos that match. Somehow I think 60 is the new 45 as far as female libidos are concerned. But there has to be an intellectual connection way before the hips start connecting for sure, otherwise, it just does not work.
Quote:
In any case, these statements apply to quantity, not quality. Personally, I have had 2 or three sexual experiences in my entire life that were approaching anything that resembles an ideal in my mind. You know, the kind where both people were matched in desire and emotional connection, and ended up being completely satisfied both physically and emotionally afterward, and which now serve as fond wistful memories of What Might Have Been in my dotage. The "brass ring" that everyone reaches for and wishes they could have each and every time -- and which, before you had any actual sexual experiences, you imagined sex would BE like.
LOL... I think you just said in different words what I tried to say above, there HAS to be an intellectual connection first. If that is not there, then it becomes just mutual masturbation, and that truly is not satisfying in the long run, agreed.
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Good for you that you actually think 20+ times a month is "normal". Truly. Triple good for you if your partners could keep up and felt similarly. You probably don't know how lucky you are.
It really is not excessive. Think about it this way, 3 times a week under normal circumstances = 12 x a month. Throw in 2x each on Saturday and Sunday (evening and morning), is 8 more times... all of a sudden 20 is not that big a number. Or some variation of the weekend encounters during the week. And yes, both need to feel the same way, of course. If it is not a mutual desire, with mutual respect, then it doesn't work. Obligation sex is a non- starter.
It really is not excessive. Think about it this way, 3 times a week under normal circumstances = 12 x a month. Throw in 2x each on Saturday and Sunday (evening and morning), is 8 more times... all of a sudden 20 is not that big a number. Or some variation of the weekend encounters during the week. And yes, both need to feel the same way, of course. If it is not a mutual desire, with mutual respect, then it doesn't work. Obligation sex is a non- starter.
I didn't say it wasn't achievable or even theoretically unreasonable. I just maintain that for any random person on the street, male or female, would they LIKE to achieve that? Most definitely yes, barring health issues or something and assuming it was actually as enjoyable as it's supposed to be. HAVE they? Most likely not even close.
Location: In a little house on the prairie - literally
10,202 posts, read 7,893,738 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mordant
I didn't say it wasn't achievable or even theoretically unreasonable. I just maintain that for any random person on the street, male or female, would they LIKE to achieve that? Most definitely yes, barring health issues or something and assuming it was actually as enjoyable as it's supposed to be. HAVE they? Most likely not even close.
Fair enough and understand what your saying. Everyone's experience is different. And that is why masturbation was invented.. the topic here.
I would like to hear everyone's opinion whether or not they consider masturbation a sin.
There is the biblical story about a fellow named Onan, and many people consider his sin was masturbation ... or "spilling his seed on the ground." Other claim it was disobeying God.
What is your opinion?
If you're a believer and have masturbated, how do you defend your behavior?
Fair enough and understand what your saying. Everyone's experience is different. And that is why masturbation was invented.. the topic here.
Yeah although you do get to a point where you can't even gin up a plausible fantasy to which to masturbate ... and good riddance, as it seems like flogging the bishop at our age is a singularly pathetic commentary on what one's life has come to, at least it that's ALL it's come to, sexually speaking.
But I digress. I have to say that in my salad days (early 1970s) masturbation was not a willing topic of discussion. If one were to gather the courage to see your pastor with a question like the the one posed by the OP, I've little doubt it would be regarded as a "sin" on the basis that even to lust for a woman "in your heart" is no different than fornication itself. But my guess is that most of us happily indulged with only modest feelings of guilt. Or more exactly, the misery of unfulfilled desire at that age is stronger than the guilt the church overtly heaped upon us for fulfilling it in a way that at least seemed far less heinous than the dreaded "sex out of wedlock". (Funny the odd, stilted terminology used to describe such things in those days, it somehow made what should be a beautiful aspect of life seem so seedy. "out of wedlock", "in the nude", etc. were language constructs never used outside of hushed tone gossip, as if these baroque phrasings somehow kept people unsullied from the concepts they represented).
It all comes down to what others have said better than me: the ridiculous notion that the creator, sustainer and ruler of heaven and earth would be concerned with what you do with your sexuality (that he saddled you with in the first place) is not only absurd, but creepy in ways that escape my powers of description. It is unfortunate that we even have to address the issue. It's a little like asking if god loses sleep over what cologne you wear or the color of upholstery in your house, with prurient interest added in for good measure.
I'm not sure but I do know it makes hair grow in the palms of your hands.
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