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Whoa to the man who makes a mockery of satan or Santa, for he shall toil in his mole infested yard for all of his days!
I know I was warned by Blue not to attack Mrs. Claus or the elves but it's my understanding that the elves rarely bathe, have bad breath and are generally very irritable. I realize that the work environment gets very hectic in December but can't they take a few minutes each day to get cleaned up? Mrs. Claus isn't so bad although she and her husband could probably drop about 200 pounds each and do you realize those two wear the very same clothes every day of the week?
I know I was warned by Blue not to attack Mrs. Claus or the elves but it's my understanding that the elves rarely bathe, have bad breath and are generally very irritable. I realize that the work environment gets very hectic in December but can't they take a few minutes each day to get cleaned up? Mrs. Claus isn't so bad although she and her husband could probably drop about 200 pounds each and do you realize those two wear the very same clothes every day of the week?
Ah, but 'tis even more perilous to attach such mysogynous thinking to the likes of Mrs. Claus! There are some things that are even more sacred in this world, and the likes of such reasoning as applied above shalt not go unnoticed!
The powers that be shall unleash their furies upon you, my poor, dear, sweet man! Because as all good people have come to know, 'tis not nice to mess with Mrs. Claus!
Trust me, the night is young. I'm tellin' ya, the guy has it in for reindeer, too.
It's just the flying demonic reindeer that concern me, the earthbound reindeer are ok. Well the moles did do a job trashing my yard but that was before I even mentioned Santa and his clan. I retaliated though and three of them are in mole heaven.
It seems to me that Santa is God, not Satan, as in the old world Santa had many religious attributes (he was/is an old man with a white beard who wears scarlet. He is called "Father" and is known as Father Christmas. He is also known as St. Nick. The St. implication is obvious).
Both Santa Claus and God:
-Live in a mythical/magical place (the North Pole and Heaven, respectively).
-Have the ability to watch your every move. Ok, it is not asserted that Santa actually watches you, but;
-They both keep track of when you are good and when you are bad, and reward (presents, Heaven) when you are good or punish you (the figurative lump of coal, Hell) when you are bad.
-They employ an army of workers that are absolute in their loyalties (elves, angles).
-Have mystical/magical powers. Santa can fly, enter your home to leave presents, the ability to cover the entire planet in a single night. And God, well, God can do anything.
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The Vengeful Mole Retribution
Well the moles did do a job trashing my yard but that was before I even mentioned Santa and his clan. I retaliated though and three of them are in mole heaven.
