Religious Joke of the Day (paradise, Buddhist, Baptist, reincarnation)
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Religious jokes, aye...
On a serious note: "Dearest Dada Bhagwan! Give me infinite inner strength not to hurt, cause someone to hurt, nor encourage anyone to hurt even to the slightest extent, the foundation of any religion.Give me infinite strength not to hurt, even to the slightest extent, the foundation of any religion and give me the strength to conduct my speech, thoughts, and actions in a manner that is accepted by all."
After the Romans put Jesus on the cross, Jesus looked down and saw John at the foot of the hill. Jesus says, "John, come here", John, knowing that his Lord had one more thing to pass on to him, started up the hill and almost at the top the Roman soldiers pushed him back down the hill. Again Jesus says, "John, come here", and again John started up the hill and had the same results. Again Jesus says, "John, John, come here", this time John was determined to get to the foot of the cross, he put all his will and energy into it, at the foot of the cross John looks up at Jesus and says, "Yes, my Lord, I'm here, what is it you want to tell me", Jesus replied, "John, I can see your house from here".
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and when he picked up a CD player to place in his pack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you."
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight out, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, promised himself a vacation after the next big score, then clicked the light on and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard,
"Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?", he hissed at the parrot.
"Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you."
The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?"
"Moses," replied the bird.
"Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?"
"The kind of people that would name a Rottweiller Jesus."
So Hitler is out riding with a group of people when suddenly his horse bolts, runs a couple of miles from the group and throws him to the ground. All this is happening in a forest.
Hitler is alone on the ground when along comes a Jew who helps Hitler back to his group.
Hitler says to the Jew, "I know you are a Jew, but you have saved my life, so ask me anything you want".
The Jew replies, "Really, anything?",
"Yes, absolutely anything", says Hitler
So the Jew says "Please don't tell anyone".
You're right. I don't get it at all. Perhaps you can explain it to all us readers.
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