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Old 11-03-2015, 02:36 PM
 
Location: Toronto
6,754 posts, read 3,354,490 times
Reputation: 4619

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Am I reading too much in to this or it is this just a coisidence? Anyone who knows me knows that I am completly agnostic. Really religious people generally make me super uncomfortable. When I am around really religious people in the back of my head I am always worried they are trying to con me in to converting. Similar to the character esqueleto in nacho libre I believe in science with a touch of a possibility of God, but I am not willing to put my money down on anyone one faith and blindly follow anything. I am REALLY not religious at all. Attending Catholic school until 19 did not change that either. My thinking is also not related to a lack of knowledge I have actually learned about many world religions, but think of this stuff like a subject and not a specific guide to life. I have been in 3 serious relationships with men in my life (still with the last one) and for some messed up reason all 3 of these men were like really religious. This did not actually change me much ... it may have sort of pushed them a little away from being as devout as they may have been without me in their lives. All 3 of these men persued me and not the other way around (so it is not exactly like I was trying to pull men away from their faith).

#1 Was a conservative Israeli Jew (we dated for a couple years), but it fizziled when I realized he would not actually marry to when we were older beacuse our kids would not be considered fully Jewish and he was totally in to his culture and fairth.

#2 His family were Jehova Witnesses and he was certainly not observant we met at a pool hall and he was drinking, always was at bars or night clubs and never went to the Kingdom Hall like his brother. His parents rarely did too. This one was much more serious and he periodically vocalized that he was considering getting back in to his faith. He went back and forth on this idea and eventually broke up with me after 3 years of dating me ( never sure if it was for someone else, to get back in to his religion or just because he needed get his head and life together and it was too difficulty doing that while being attached to me/someone else)

#3 Devout Muslim that fasts for Ramadan, prays 5 times a day and does all that other observant religious stuff that goes along with that. For some crazy reason he thought I might actually convert some day. No idea where he got that messed up idea, but that is never going to happen.

I though #2 and I were going to actually get married and stuff ( got dumped instead ). I accidently (... sort of came across one of his online profiles and he appears to be really in to religion and stuff ... which makes me think did I get dumped for GOD !!!!)

I swear I am not seeking these men out. They are totally approaching me and I have no desire to follow any religious stuff... my own or anyone else's. I do not dress or act conservatively either. I have never been in a serious relationship with anyone Catholic, Christian or not religious, which would actually make my life a whole lot easier. I could actally celebrate Christmas without any negativity ... what a miracle that would be.

Am I some sort of she devil trying to curpt religious men or is God just trying to stick it to me and be like ha ha ... their all mine .. submit to me or be sorry?

Last edited by PJSaturn; 11-03-2015 at 03:49 PM.. Reason: Edited thread title for clarification.
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Old 11-03-2015, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
39,026 posts, read 37,656,456 times
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Reading too much into it.

God has bigger things to worry about.
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Old 11-03-2015, 02:51 PM
 
8,224 posts, read 6,549,560 times
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You can't be conned in to thinking some way you are not already susceptible to thinking...so stop worrying about that.

Take people for who they are and find someone who can do the same back, if you find people who worship hard to be compatible with don't look at them for romantic prospects.

Find others who share your world view.

You're not a she devil, you're just trying to climb up the wrong hills as long term prospects
No matter how forgiving or how accepting someone may be, their beliefs are their beliefs at the end of the day...they will affect their lives regardless of forgiveness and understanding.
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Old 11-03-2015, 02:52 PM
 
2,014 posts, read 1,151,050 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
Reading too much into it.

God has bigger things to worry about.
Yep. This.
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Old 11-03-2015, 02:54 PM
 
Location: Toronto
6,754 posts, read 3,354,490 times
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Default I hope so!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
Reading too much into it.

God has bigger things to worry about.

I hope so.. lol. To think god has some extra time to mess with my head would be really strange.
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Old 11-03-2015, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Toronto
6,754 posts, read 3,354,490 times
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Default Confusing to know ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by rego00123 View Post
You can't be conned in to thinking some way you are not already susceptible to thinking...so stop worrying about that.

Take people for who they are and find someone who can do the same back, if you find people who worship hard to be compatible with don't look at them for romantic prospects.

Find others who share your world view.

You're not a she devil, you're just trying to climb up the wrong hills as long term prospects
All these men have personalities that I really like, are fun to be around, are pretty good people (not perfect) and I am physically attracted too, but then bang the GOD factor always makes it complicated and becomes a wedge. In some ways I think their religious values are what helps shape the characteristic about them I like, but their devout tendencies (ex praying and thinking that certain holidays or eating certain things are bad annoys the heck out of me).
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Old 11-03-2015, 03:02 PM
 
199 posts, read 122,039 times
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I don't know if God is trying to tell you something, have you asked him/her?

If you are consciously dressing and/or behaving in a sexy fashion (as you state you are not conservative) you might be attracting guys who are in some sort of spiritual crisis that want a--- less conservative look, shall we say? I know it's 2015 but sexist stereotypes are still alive and well and there are men who will be happy to date you indefinitely...until the right girl comes along. We all put a message out there, regardless of our conscious intent sometimes, in our dress and our body language. When I hear similar complaints from young women (and men, they do it too) there is usually a logical reason behind the pattern they keep experiencing.
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Old 11-03-2015, 05:11 PM
 
Location: Central IL
13,349 posts, read 7,121,412 times
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You need to realize that ANY person with extreme religious views will insert that religion into most all aspects of their lives. So once you find out they are "extreme" (your definition) immediately bring it up to see what they are thinking in terms of the relationship. And be prepared to end it - before it gets serious.

I think you view their extremism and devotion as them being "passionate" about life or something - but it is much deeper for them obviously and would likely require you to substantially change your life, which your aren't willing to do. Recognize that up front.
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Old 11-03-2015, 05:43 PM
 
6,805 posts, read 3,275,204 times
Reputation: 8481
Quote:
Originally Posted by klmrocks View Post
All these men have personalities that I really like, are fun to be around, are pretty good people (not perfect) and I am physically attracted too, but then bang the GOD factor always makes it complicated and becomes a wedge. In some ways I think their religious values are what helps shape the characteristic about them I like, but their devout tendencies (ex praying and thinking that certain holidays or eating certain things are bad annoys the heck out of me).
Your problem is that you don't learn from the past. Based on your experience with devout men, you should not entertain the notion of a relationship with these types of guys in the first place.

Of course someone who is devoutly religious is going to have issues with someone who is agnostic. This is pretty much a no brainer.
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Old 11-03-2015, 06:03 PM
 
Location: Toronto
6,754 posts, read 3,354,490 times
Reputation: 4619
Default ... it is possible...

Quote:
Originally Posted by blingding View Post
I don't know if God is trying to tell you something, have you asked him/her?

If you are consciously dressing and/or behaving in a sexy fashion (as you state you are not conservative) you might be attracting guys who are in some sort of spiritual crisis that want a--- less conservative look, shall we say? I know it's 2015 but sexist stereotypes are still alive and well and there are men who will be happy to date you indefinitely...until the right girl comes along. We all put a message out there, regardless of our conscious intent sometimes, in our dress and our body language. When I hear similar complaints from young women (and men, they do it too) there is usually a logical reason behind the pattern they keep experiencing.
No # 3 married me (and he asked me ... I never hinted or asked him) . Even though I told him that I would not convert for some crazy reason I think he thought I would change my mind about converting! But regardless I think you are on to something regarding spiritual crisis more so with number #2. That man was all over the map. Re dressing ... I could tone it down and tried to at first with #3, but it is just not who I am. Men are strange like that. They want a seductress and an angle at the same time. It can be confusing. #2 was the worst for that ... totally confused ... and possibly bi-polar . In all 3 cases we were likely attracted to each other because we were so very different, but were stronger in different area. I tend to be a bit more street smart and assertive and they tend to be more concerned about faith and morality. Regardless all 3 situations were a mix of the greatest pleasure and the worst pain. #3 and I are always intense in either direction of love or hate and it shifts back and forth by the hour. It is either a ying yang type situation or complete disaster. Not sure.

Wow I am really starting to think #2 might have dumped me for God. At first I really thought it was another women and I really ripped in to him. I could not deprogram that one. Regardless he was too high maintenance. Always getting drunk and dropping out to College. My brain knows that relationship was a bad situation, but heart still telling me but it was bad it was so good. #2 is the most confusing person I have ever known. On hand could be an angel, but on the other hand always getting in to trouble or doing bad things. Religious when he was feeling guilty, but not when he was pursing and engaging in trouble.

#1 I knew was going south fast so I started dating other people.

Man ... the trouble I get myself in to.

Last edited by klmrocks; 11-03-2015 at 06:30 PM..
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