Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Religion and Spirituality
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-09-2008, 01:05 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,364,666 times
Reputation: 8075

Advertisements

I wasn't sure if this is the right place to post this or should it go to "health and wellness".

I have 2 very troublesome personality traits: I always feel guilty and I always worry. When I do something enjoyable for myself, I can't relax. I always feel like I don't deserve it, I should be doing something productive, I should be doing something for others. When I do something enjoyable like getting a massage, my mind always wonders how I'm spending money and I shouldn't, how I should be with my family i/off doing something for myself.
And the fact that I'm a Christian with Jewish background doesn't help at all!

Another part of me is a constant worrier. My husband said that he had never met anyone in his life that worries more then me. I always think about the future, never living in the presence, always worrying about work, money, my son.

Can anyone else relate? Has anyone recovered and was able to beat these horrible self-destructive qualities?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-09-2008, 02:15 PM
 
Location: Sarasota, Florida
3,412 posts, read 10,159,183 times
Reputation: 2033
I can't imagine living like this, and i really feel for you. I don't think it has anything to do with religion at all. It's how you are, i'm guessing you're suffering from anxiety. Have you consulted a good doctor? There might be medications/herbs that can help you. This is no way to live like this, it doesn't do anyone good, including yourself.
You might need to seek a professional help.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 02:35 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,364,666 times
Reputation: 8075
But I don't have any anxieties at all! I don't get panic attacks and I'm not depressed. I'm generally an upbeat person.
The reason I posted here because I have a feeling that it has to do with my SPIRITUAL health, rather then physical.

Speaking of herbs though, I do take herbal medicine that relaxes me. I might need to see a psychologist, but I don't think that my problems are pshychiatric...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 03:02 PM
 
Location: vagabond
2,631 posts, read 5,449,239 times
Reputation: 1314
i think there is definitely a spiritual side to this issue, but i would bet that the majority of it actually is pyschological.

nothing wrong with that--it means you're a human, one with worries, fears, and chemical reactions.

my wife has somewhat similar hangups, and my mom suffered severely from anxiety for years (though she never had panic attacks either, that we knew of). i'm not a psychologist, so i'm not gonna try to tell you that this is your problem. but i would bet that some counseling would help you feel better. just talking about it with someone that is trained to understand the roots of your issues can help you recognize and combat them.

counseling is not that bad, though you need to be sure you get a counselor that listens appropriately to you.

for the spritual side, there are religious counselors that are trained and educated in the standard system, that can talk to you about the spiritual effects that are bothering you. making sure you get someone tht actually knows what they are doing would be paramount though, otherwise you are just paying for a palm-reading.

aaron out.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 03:27 PM
 
Location: In the North Idaho woods, still surrounded by terriers
2,179 posts, read 7,010,112 times
Reputation: 1014
Excessive worry is one of the main traits of depression/anxiety disorders. Nothing to be ashamed of or anything...talk to a doctor as well as a spiritual counselor. You'll be fine...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 04:36 PM
 
3,758 posts, read 8,433,272 times
Reputation: 873
Quote:
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post
I wasn't sure if this is the right place to post this or should it go to "health and wellness".

I have 2 very troublesome personality traits: I always feel guilty and I always worry. When I do something enjoyable for myself, I can't relax. I always feel like I don't deserve it, I should be doing something productive, I should be doing something for others. When I do something enjoyable like getting a massage, my mind always wonders how I'm spending money and I shouldn't, how I should be with my family i/off doing something for myself.
And the fact that I'm a Christian with Jewish background doesn't help at all!

Another part of me is a constant worrier. My husband said that he had never met anyone in his life that worries more then me. I always think about the future, never living in the presence, always worrying about work, money, my son.

Can anyone else relate? Has anyone recovered and was able to beat these horrible self-destructive qualities?
http://www.joycemeyer.org/

I highly recommend your going to Joyce Meyer's website. Either listen to her broadcasts or look in the section named Everyday Answers/Answers to Real Issues. She talks about exactly what you are going through. Guilt, worry, etc. I know it helps me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 05:11 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,915 posts, read 18,604,075 times
Reputation: 5524
I'm sorry that you're having these difficulties and I would urge you to consider talking to a professional about them. All of us have certain traits in our personality that can cause us alot of grief, I'm certainly no exception. I guess I feel that if these problems are at a level in which they're really impacting your life that you need to do something about it. I don't think any of us except June are really qualitified to address something of this nature although some kind and helpful posts have been made by a few people. I honestly don't think that a forum on the internet can give you what you need. Your comments were fairly brief so I don't know how serious of a problem it really is, you're the only one who knows how much this is impacting your life. If it is serious you need to consult with someone who is a professional in dealing with psychological issues. You also mentioned some conflicts about being a Christian with a Jewish background. You might consider talking to someone you feel comfortable with, a pastor or minister, and explain your feelings, I'm sure they would also be more than happy to address these issues. Good luck to you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 06:05 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,364,666 times
Reputation: 8075
Thank you for all the responses so far. I might consider getting professional evaluation. I think these issues first and foremost stop me from enjoying my life to full capacity and sorta effect my relationship with my husband, because he is worried about me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 07:13 PM
 
7,991 posts, read 12,251,422 times
Reputation: 4348
Quote:
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post


I have a feeling that it has to do with my SPIRITUAL health, rather then physical.
Am just curious: what has you leaning towards this pertaining (specifically) to your spiritual health? (As opposed to your emotional or psychological?)

-June
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-09-2008, 07:50 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,364,666 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by june 7th View Post
Am just curious: what has you leaning towards this pertaining (specifically) to your spiritual health? (As opposed to your emotional or psychological?)

-June
I feel like as a Christian, I should have more faith in the Lord that he loves me the way I am, that I deserve all the great things that he gives me, that I should be thankful that I can afford the darn massage and send gratitude. I feel like all my worries is another sign of insecurity and instability in my faith that God will carry me through all the good and the bad. I feel like I should be able to lean on God and not fear, but I'm overwhelmed with fear, guilt, worries all the time. I feel like I should be able to let go of all those feelings and be able to trust God, but I can't. That's why I posted this in Religion forum. I wish there was something like Personal Spiritual growth subforum or something rather, that would probably be more fitting for this thread.

In general, I'm not depressed, I do understand all the wonderful things in my life, and if you asked anyone at my job, they would never tell I struggle with all this. I also don't get panicky. It's more of a nagging dull feelings of not being worthy of all the joy when there is just so much negativity, poverty, death going on around me.

Perhaps it's not just spiritual but also psychological and emotional as well. perhaps it's a combination of all those things. Actually my dad is this type of person too who always works and never gets to fully relax, always in the worries, perhaps it's instilled in me. My DH is completely opposite. Always optimistic, he was born to enjoy life. I'm envious of his ability to just let go and enjoy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Religion and Spirituality
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top