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Because as a teenager, I know that if I'd have heard that line from my folks I wouldn't have heard the first part about "we prefer...."
I would tell my teenager that he/she wasn't allowed to take the boat out until they could responsibly handle it.
Your teenager already has his hands on the "boat" and he's going to take it out. The smart thing to do is to teach him how to handle it responsibly. How long can your boat say in dry dock?
All I can say is that if you have kids I hope they listen to you kdbrich, otherwise they may be added to the number of teens with unwanted babies or those that contract an STD...
I think another thing that ties into this problem of Christians teaching abstinence is the higher incidence of divorce among Christians....Since they don't believe in abortion, preach abstinence that doesn't often work, there are far more "shotgun" weddings, and we all know how well they work out don't we.
All I can say is that if you have kids I hope they listen to you kdbrich, otherwise they may be added to the number of teens with unwanted babies or those that contract an STD...
I think another thing that ties into this problem of Christians teaching abstinence is the higher incidence of divorce among Christians....Since they don't believe in abortion, preach abstinence that doesn't often work, there are far more "shotgun" weddings, and we all know how well they work out don't we.
I wonder if anyone has researched the cause and effect of shotguns weddings and high divorce rates in the Christian faith?
Let's see high teen pregnancy rate, spreading STDs and high divorce rate....then they send missionaries to third world countries to teach other people how to live. It's just shocking when you think about it.
Out of love, lets protect our children from unwanted pregnancy, STDs, or cancer. Unyielding strictness and a lack of loving concern may be part of the reason teenagers look for "love" in the form of sexual relations.
It's interesting to me and always has been. Growing up in a 'Red State' but being raised by an entire family who was from a rather liberal 'Blue State' was always a little confusing for me - even as a teenager. Being in the situation that I was in, a 'Blue' at heart living in 'Red Land', I was constantly inundated with a kaleidoscope of different viewpoints and people.
I am still curious as to why I always managed to pick them out... Perhaps they picked me out; I'm not sure. Either way, all throughout the two and a half years I attended high school, I almost always, without fail, managed to pick up the girls who were the daughters of preachers, pastors, etc... They almost always grew up in very strict households where crosses were tacked with security to the wall. Pictures of Jesus adorned the walls and the giant family Bible was usually in a very visible place. For those unfamiliar, the 'Family Bible' is usually a Bible passed down from generation to generation and often has lineages as far back as a few centuries (depending on when the family came to the U.S.)
I suppose this is how I really and truly got to learn the Bible. I never had studied it prior to high school; I wasn't interested at all. Yet, after my first bad experience dating a girl in high school whose father demanded to know what religion I was and when I lied and said "Catholic" (despite my Atheism) he chased me out of the house and called me all sorts of names. Destined not to be ridiculed and embarrassed in that manner again, I quickly learned key catch-phrases, passages, and I studied a little bit about every fundamentalists' favorite thing - the end of the world (The Rapture - Oooohhhh Spooky!).
I did all of this for a reason. To put it mildly, the reason was because teenage males, at least this teenage male filled with unstoppable hormones knew that the quickest way to having any sort of sexual encounter was with the girls who were stowed away under the lock and key of the family Bible, the crosses on the walls and the raging lunatic fathers who hated my guts because I was 'Catholic' (*snicker* - if they only really knew) because their ignorance to the possible results of it made it far easier - not to mention the 'taboo factor'.
Now, I can't help but sit here and read through these threads at people who demand that preaching abstinence is the best policy. I'll tell you one thing. This "Blue State" male growing up in "Red Land" sure taught many of those young women how to put a condom on me. I even taught a few what a condom was and I had to explain how people get pregnant. So, go ahead, preach your 'abstinence only' thing and hide behind the crosses on your walls and your family Bibles because there's a teenage male just like me who is evolving his very game plan to work his way into your home and court your daughters. This I can guarantee.
Oh yeah, every time I walk past the condom aisle at Walgreen's I grab some and run out and have sex with the first guy I see. I just can't handle myself!
I tell ya, it's like waving a bag of dope in front of a drug addict!
I'm sorry, but placing dispensers in bathrooms, to me, is encouragement.
I'm not naive enough to think kids won't mess around, but I'm not going to buy them contraception and tell 'em to have a good time.
Then your child will be one of those 1/9 to get pregnant. It's like giving your kid a gun, but turning the safety off and not telling them how to turn it back on. Sure, most of the kids will be responsible with the gun and learn about it before using it, but some will just assume their parents told them all they needed to know and will shoot themselves in the foot.
Having a penis is as much encouragement a teenage boy needs...most teenage girls only need the encouragement of a horny teenage boy to have sex. They start thinking about sex before they are even teenagers (trust me, I coach kids ages 8-15 and they all talk about sex and drugs all the time, more than anything else really...) and it is our responsibility as role models to show them how to be responsible. By saying "giving my son a condom is encouragement" is simply to ignore that what you're really doing by not giving him a condom is encouraging him to have sex without one.
If you tell your son "always use a condom, and here's a box of 12 for you to have no excuses", he is far more likely to be responsible and use a condom than if you just ignore the fact that he's having sex. A 16 year old boy will have sex at any opportunity he has presented to him, so you might as well make sure he has a condom so you wont have to pay for your son to raise a child while he's only able to make minimum wage.
I never even thought of this - no gas station bathrooms either!
perhaps its just me, but I would NEVER rely on a condom bought out of one of those machines in the bathrooms...
A box isn't that expensive...honestly, the line "hey, can i borrow $10 until next friday" isn't that hard to say to a friend if you don't have the money right offhand
Making condoms easily available for teens is very important, because they are not mature and many of the things they do are done on impulse. In fact they should all carry condoms at all times in their purse or wallets.
Like boy scouts...Always be prepared....You and I may not like it but better they are safe than everyone is sorry.
The heat generated within a wallet deteriorates the latex in a condom, making them slightly better than useless. Purses aren't much better of an option.
I think another thing that ties into this problem of Christians teaching abstinence is the higher incidence of divorce among Christians....Since they don't believe in abortion, preach abstinence that doesn't often work, there are far more "shotgun" weddings, and we all know how well they work out don't we.
This is compounded by a few other problems within Christian concepts.
1. You are not supposed fornicate - it's sin. This presses the issue of marriage to kids who barely know how to **** straight.
2. You are not supposed to lust - it's sin. To avoid lust(ing), the Bible says one should marry. Again, this puts young kids in a position where marriage solves one problem but [potentially] creates a million more.
3. You are not supposed to divorce - it's sin (depending on which Christian you're speaking to).
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