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Old 02-09-2009, 09:43 AM
 
4,669 posts, read 3,908,470 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BornOKThe1stTime View Post
I would not have married my husband if he were a christian. Or any kind of "believer". I just wanted a partner with common sense. Someone I trusted to raise my children. I couldn't bare having a fight over whether to baptize our kids (Not A Chance). It's bad enough that his parents are christian and his mom wants me to baptize our son "just in case."

I don't need that extra drama.


May not be what you'd expect from me....but I respect that. I really do.

I have a family member that is non-religious, as is her husband. They had their first child baptized "just in case", and plan to have the next one baptized, too. It means nothing to them--but is just something that you do, and it pleases the grandparents.

Personally, I'm offended that they'd make a mockery of something that I take very seriously.
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Old 02-09-2009, 09:47 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdbrich View Post
May not be what you'd expect from me....but I respect that. I really do.

I have a family member that is non-religious, as is her husband. They had their first child baptized "just in case", and plan to have the next one baptized, too. It means nothing to them--but is just something that you do, and it pleases the grandparents.

Personally, I'm offended that they'd make a mockery of something that I take very seriously.

I don't take it seriously that is why I refuse to include my child in some superstition. I think it is way out of line to expect a nonbeliever to do something so stupid. So I think we agree?
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Old 02-09-2009, 10:00 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BornOKThe1stTime View Post
I don't take it seriously that is why I refuse to include my child in some superstition. I think it is way out of line to expect a nonbeliever to do something so stupid. So I think we agree?

I think we actually agree. If you don't value it and think it's a worthless ritual or ceremony, then don't make a mockery of it by going through the motions just to please others. Take a stand and have the intestinal fortitude to say that you don't want it.
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Old 02-09-2009, 10:20 AM
 
Location: Southern Oregon
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What a person believes or doesn't believe helps frame their character, if you loved someone enough to marry them, then in my opinion, it really doesn't matter. Most people marry because they share common interest and views and this adds to their personal relationship with their partner. It would come down to the intent of the people involved.
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Old 02-09-2009, 01:00 PM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
8,998 posts, read 12,774,957 times
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My gf is a Buddhist and it works out fine.
I could date a girl who is a Unitarian Universalist or some other really liberal sect of Christianity provided she knew that I will never change my stance on Atheism and didn't try to make me go to church with her.
I think it's more the believers who are less open to dating someone who is a non believer rather than the other way around....
I've had girls only turn me down because I'm an atheist. "Uhm, I like you but you're not a Christian so..."
Okay babe, don't let the doorknob split you where the spaghetti monster split ya.
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Old 02-09-2009, 01:20 PM
 
Location: San Diego, CA
397 posts, read 872,598 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Public_Newsense View Post
Most of us know that many Christians will not date or marry outside their faith (myself included) and most of us have heard others get riled about that. I'd like to hear from non-Christians who would not date or marry a Christian; without demeaning, can you tell us why? I know why Christians won't, I'd like to hear your side too.
It's quite interesting - my husband and I never even discussed religion until much later in our marriage. A few years ago, he mentioned that he felt like he wanted to attend a service occasionally. My response was - by all means go. So, now, he occasionally attends a very traditional Episcopalian service and says that it is good for him to reflect. From what I understand, he doesn't necessarily buy into all the doctrine and beliefs, but has sort of a deist view of the world.

So, to answer your question, being an atheist is not the most important thing in my life at all - it is like having blue eyes or blonde hair. It is not something that would prevent me from being married to a religious or quasi-religious person.

However, as others pointed out, I would probably not be in a relationship with a fundamentalist or a creationist. It would be hard to live with someone who is willing to ignore the world we live in and the evidence it presents. Living with a moderate, intellectual Christian would be different, because the person's beliefs would still be mostly consistent with a natural world view with lots of faith added. But when faith supplants reality entirely, that is where I would have problems.
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Old 02-09-2009, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Under a bridge.
3,196 posts, read 4,721,540 times
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I've been lied to too many times by evangelical christians. Seriously. I don't mean little white lies, but ones about things that are really important. I've been treated very, very rudely by a guy who was a fairly well known pastor, when he came over to my house to look at the motorhome I was selling. I've been threatened (physically) by people who claim to "follow jesus."

If someone that I am interested in dating is a Christian, I hope they tell me before we get to the restaurant on our first date. That way I can take her straight home without spending my hard earned money on her.
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Old 02-09-2009, 02:05 PM
 
4,669 posts, read 3,908,470 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dcashley View Post
I've been lied to too many times by evangelical christians. Seriously. I don't mean little white lies, but ones about things that are really important. I've been treated very, very rudely by a guy who was a fairly well known pastor, when he came over to my house to look at the motorhome I was selling. I've been threatened (physically) by people who claim to "follow jesus."

If someone that I am interested in dating is a Christian, I hope they tell me before we get to the restaurant on our first date. That way I can take her straight home without spending my hard earned money on her.


I've been threatened and lied to by atheists. Does that mean I should hate you or avoid atheists?

You're likely a nice person. I'd be throwing the baby out with the bathwater if I did that. Likewise, I'm sorry if you've run into some hypocrites in your lifetime that claim to be religious...but it's kind of silly to base your opinion of Jesus on some of the knuckleheads that claim to follow him.
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Old 02-09-2009, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Under a bridge.
3,196 posts, read 4,721,540 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdbrich View Post
I've been threatened and lied to by atheists. Does that mean I should hate you or avoid atheists?

You're likely a nice person. I'd be throwing the baby out with the bathwater if I did that. Likewise, I'm sorry if you've run into some hypocrites in your lifetime that claim to be religious...but it's kind of silly to base your opinion of Jesus on some of the knuckleheads that claim to follow him.
Well, what other choices do I have:
1. A book that was edited by Esubius (one of Constitine's slaves)?
2. A book that has serious inconsistencies?
3. Religious icons?
4. Visions or hallucinations (depending on your 'bent')?

Someplace in the Christian scriptures it says something like, "you shall know them by their fruit" I think it is in Matthew's gospel--but I'm not sure. So, looking at their "fruit." I see very big issues of immorality. I see very big problems with the sanctity of life. I see a lot of hypocracy (why is abortion a sin, but capital punishment is not. ... or if you don't like that one, why was the human sacrifices in UR immoral, but the human sacrifice of Jesus was not ...)

Why is it ok to hate another for their religion? I mean take a look at the historical foundations of anti-semitism--starting with St. Augustine's book, "The City of God." What about the Salem Witch Trials, the inquisition, the crusades....???? How does this "fruit" compare with anything that is good?
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Old 02-09-2009, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Under a bridge.
3,196 posts, read 4,721,540 times
Reputation: 976
oh...forgot...in the previous post when I mentioned UR, I was referring to the human sacrifices to temple prostitutes that occurred as part of religious ceremony in Ur of Chaldea--where Abraham grew up.
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