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Old 02-09-2009, 02:18 AM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,506 posts, read 17,324,325 times
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Most of us know that many Christians will not date or marry outside their faith (myself included) and most of us have heard others get riled about that. I'd like to hear from non-Christians who would not date or marry a Christian; without demeaning, can you tell us why? I know why Christians won't, I'd like to hear your side too.
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Old 02-09-2009, 03:13 AM
 
995 posts, read 1,175,527 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Public_Newsense View Post
Most of us know that many Christians will not date or marry outside their faith (myself included) and most of us have heard others get riled about that. I'd like to hear from non-Christians who would not date or marry a Christian; without demeaning, can you tell us why? I know why Christians won't, I'd like to hear your side too.
I have absolutely no problems dating a Christian as we both share similarities in major issues such as we both revere Jesus and agree that Jesus will come down to earth. Marrying one is fine as long as we both agree that Jesus was just one in a long line of human Jewish prophets notwithstanding his virgin birth and that God is standalone w/o a son or daughter and that Muhammad is the seal of the prophets

What I will not date or marry is a christian who can only parrot the prevalent views and does not dare to engage in dialogue
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Old 02-09-2009, 05:32 AM
 
Location: Oxford, England
13,036 posts, read 21,531,994 times
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I would have no problem marrying a Christian if he was not a fundamentalist nor a creationist. Most Christians I know aren't either.

As long as you respect their values and beliefs and they respect yours there shouldn't be any problem. I could not however marry someone who was bigoted , homophobic , or believes that the earth was 6000 years old and humans roamed the earth at the same time as dinosaurs. I have to draw the line at that.

But I have dated what I would term "moderate" Christians and that was never an issue. We always had rather heated discussions but still respected each other at the end which is paramount.
There is no love without respect and it must go both ways...
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Old 02-09-2009, 05:35 AM
 
410 posts, read 416,694 times
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The relationship seems so much better when you have more in common with each other including religious points of view. I don't think it is only christians that have this problem. I think alot of religious people turn people off for being religious.
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Old 02-09-2009, 06:43 AM
 
4,669 posts, read 3,905,750 times
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why marry someone that doesn't share the most important thing in your life?
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Old 02-09-2009, 07:00 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
521 posts, read 790,797 times
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Originally Posted by kdbrich View Post
why marry someone that doesn't share the most important thing in your life?
My atheism is not the most important part of my life. It definitely a major contributor to the person that I am, but not the most important part of my life. In fact, I don't know if I could absolutely say that there is one thing that that I hold above all others.

More to the point though, no I would not have a problem dating some one that was religious. As long as they can respect me and the personal choices I have made, and I the same, I see no reason to further complicate the tenuous nature of an intimate relationship.
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Old 02-09-2009, 07:04 AM
 
Location: The #1 sunshine state, Arizona.
12,172 posts, read 15,018,918 times
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I was raised Catholic and married a man who was raised Protestant. Both of us are agnostic although after reading posts in the Religious Forum, I'm leaning toward atheism.

I couldn't marry someone who thinks religion, God or "The Bible" is more important than people in his life.
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Old 02-09-2009, 07:25 AM
 
4,669 posts, read 3,905,750 times
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Originally Posted by forkpower View Post
My atheism is not the most important part of my life. It definitely a major contributor to the person that I am, but not the most important part of my life. In fact, I don't know if I could absolutely say that there is one thing that that I hold above all others.

More to the point though, no I would not have a problem dating some one that was religious. As long as they can respect me and the personal choices I have made, and I the same, I see no reason to further complicate the tenuous nature of an intimate relationship.

I was speaking from the perspective of a believer. You state that you'd have no problem dating a religious person that doesn't take their faith that seriously. Ok. I guess I'd question why they bother going if it's not going to affect their life? Why would you want to date someone that only plays in something as important?

To a Christian, God should be the most important thing in their life.
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Old 02-09-2009, 08:01 AM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,916 posts, read 16,409,422 times
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From a purely practical point of view I realize that as an atheist there is an extremely small population of female atheists out there who are single and looking for a mate. If you go into a singles dating website that has a category for religious affiliations, filter out the people who are religious and do a search you'll come back with zero hits. I know, I've done it. I would rather remain single than marry someone who held extreme religious views and I doubt if a woman like that would consider me anyway. I do think that a great many people end up marrying someone that they don't totally agree with on many issues and that's fine if they can respect each other's individuality and freedom of thought.
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Old 02-09-2009, 08:28 AM
 
512 posts, read 615,237 times
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I would not have married my husband if he were a christian. Or any kind of "believer". I just wanted a partner with common sense. Someone I trusted to raise my children. I couldn't bare having a fight over whether to baptize our kids (Not A Chance). It's bad enough that his parents are christian and his mom wants me to baptize our son "just in case."

I don't need that extra drama.
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