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Old 06-20-2009, 08:49 AM
 
783 posts, read 1,258,767 times
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• A postmodernist deconstructs the sign by knocking it over with his car, ending forever the tyranny of the north-south traffic over the east-west traffic.

• A serious and educated Catholic believes that he cannot understand the stop sign apart from interpretive community and their tradition. Observing that the interpretive community doesn’t take it too seriously, he doesn’t feel obligated to take it too seriously either.

• An average Catholic (or Orthodox or Coptic or Anglican or Methodist or Presbyterian or whatever) doesn’t bother to read the sign but he’ll stop if the car in front of him does.

• A fundamentalist, taking the text very literally, stops at the stop sign and waits for it to tell him to go.

• An Orthodox Jew does one of two things:

1. Take another route to work that doesn’t have a stop sign so that he doesn’t run the risk of disobeying the Law.

2. Stop at the stop sign, say, “Blessed art thou”, wait 3 seconds according to his watch, and then proceed.

• A Pharisee does the same thing as an Orthodox Jew, except that he waits 10 seconds instead of 3. He also replaces his brake lights with 1000 watt searchlights and connects his horn so that it is activated whenever he touches the brake pedal.

• A scholar from the Jesus Seminar concludes that the passage “STOP” undoubtedly was never uttered by Jesus himself but belongs entirely to stage 3 of the gospel tradition, when the church was first confronted by traffic in its parking lot.

• A “prophetic” preacher notices that the square root of the sum of the numeric representations of the letters S-T-O-P (sigma-tau-omicron-pi in the Greek alphabet), multiplied by 40 (the number of testing), and divided by four (the number of the world - north, south, east, and west), equals 666. Therefore, he concludes that stop signs are the dreaded “mark of the beast,” a harbinger of divine judgment upon the world, and must be avoided at all costs.

Complements of Todd Friel – Wretched Radio
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Old 06-20-2009, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Where there is too much snow!
6,180 posts, read 11,879,547 times
Reputation: 3032
Quote:
Originally Posted by Salt & Light View Post
• A postmodernist deconstructs the sign by knocking it over with his car, ending forever the tyranny of the north-south traffic over the east-west traffic.

• A serious and educated Catholic believes that he cannot understand the stop sign apart from interpretive community and their tradition. Observing that the interpretive community doesn’t take it too seriously, he doesn’t feel obligated to take it too seriously either.

• An average Catholic (or Orthodox or Coptic or Anglican or Methodist or Presbyterian or whatever) doesn’t bother to read the sign but he’ll stop if the car in front of him does.

• A fundamentalist, taking the text very literally, stops at the stop sign and waits for it to tell him to go.

• An Orthodox Jew does one of two things:

1. Take another route to work that doesn’t have a stop sign so that he doesn’t run the risk of disobeying the Law.

2. Stop at the stop sign, say, “Blessed art thou”, wait 3 seconds according to his watch, and then proceed.

• A Pharisee does the same thing as an Orthodox Jew, except that he waits 10 seconds instead of 3. He also replaces his brake lights with 1000 watt searchlights and connects his horn so that it is activated whenever he touches the brake pedal.

• A scholar from the Jesus Seminar concludes that the passage “STOP” undoubtedly was never uttered by Jesus himself but belongs entirely to stage 3 of the gospel tradition, when the church was first confronted by traffic in its parking lot.

• A “prophetic” preacher notices that the square root of the sum of the numeric representations of the letters S-T-O-P (sigma-tau-omicron-pi in the Greek alphabet), multiplied by 40 (the number of testing), and divided by four (the number of the world - north, south, east, and west), equals 666. Therefore, he concludes that stop signs are the dreaded “mark of the beast,” a harbinger of divine judgment upon the world, and must be avoided at all costs.

Complements of Todd Friel – Wretched Radio
Now this was just to funny, LMAO. But what about the Amish?
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Old 06-20-2009, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Log home in the Appalachians
10,582 posts, read 11,123,883 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SeabeeBolt View Post
Now this was just to funny, LMAO. But what about the Amish?
They would stop,look both ways,make sure it's clear and then continue on the way they always have...
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Old 06-20-2009, 10:30 AM
 
13,640 posts, read 23,259,903 times
Reputation: 18540
Quote:
Originally Posted by Salt & Light View Post

• A “prophetic” preacher notices that the square root of the sum of the numeric representations of the letters S-T-O-P (sigma-tau-omicron-pi in the Greek alphabet), multiplied by 40 (the number of testing), and divided by four (the number of the world - north, south, east, and west), equals 666. Therefore, he concludes that stop signs are the dreaded “mark of the beast,” a harbinger of divine judgment upon the world, and must be avoided at all costs.

Complements of Todd Friel – Wretched Radio
This one is so funny and so true...imo, of course
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Old 06-20-2009, 08:41 PM
 
Location: Where there is too much snow!
6,180 posts, read 11,879,547 times
Reputation: 3032
Quote:
Originally Posted by ptsum View Post
They would stop,look both ways,make sure it's clear and then continue on the way they always have...
But only after they made a few bucks on the way.
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Old 06-21-2009, 07:48 AM
 
Location: S. Wales.
49,758 posts, read 17,055,188 times
Reputation: 5809
love it..but then I thought what would an atheist do? In the end, I decided I wanted to see what the stop sign looked like and how it worked before I'd know what to do about it. All the theists seem to to have reacted to what the term 'stop sign' meant to them.
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Old 06-22-2009, 01:00 AM
 
Location: Camberville
14,485 posts, read 19,409,891 times
Reputation: 25277
• An Orthodox Jew does one of two things:

1. Take another route to work that doesn’t have a stop sign so that he doesn’t run the risk of disobeying the Law.


My favorite haha. Orthodox Jews are admirably serious about their beliefs, but I also believe are fairly serious about skirting around them without going over the line. Great post overall.
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Old 06-22-2009, 04:13 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn
40,048 posts, read 32,848,122 times
Reputation: 10572
I'm surprised that nobody assigned any particular significance to the stop sign having six sides.
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Old 06-22-2009, 04:28 PM
 
Location: Log home in the Appalachians
10,582 posts, read 11,123,883 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fred314X View Post
I'm surprised that nobody assigned any particular significance to the stop sign having six sides.
I guess that would mean that it was Satan's sign, it will have to be cut down and that would mean that there was no control over the intersection.
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Old 06-22-2009, 04:33 PM
 
4,511 posts, read 7,174,536 times
Reputation: 826
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fred314X View Post
I'm surprised that nobody assigned any particular significance to the stop sign having six sides.
.... but is still flat with maximum 2 dimensions .... (for which one should be thankful, i suppose)
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