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Old 10-15-2009, 03:13 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
10,894 posts, read 8,618,470 times
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Default Why Isn't Suicide Included In Obituary Columns? Should It be?

I've had a fascination with reading Obituary columns all my life. And only once have I ever read an Obituary, of a young teenager, where the parents
admitted to the fact he took his own life.

You know full well the Obituary columns are sprinkled with Suicides every day of the year, but why is it so offensive to list Suicide as the cause of death?

I know, for a fact, at the end of my life, if I'm physically capable, I'm going to end my own life and I want my Obituary to state the cause of my death, and the reasons behind it, for the whole world to see.

Perhaps the reason it's not listed as a cause of death, is it might give others the courage to do likewise.

What are your opinions? It should be left out or included in an Obituary?
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Old 10-15-2009, 04:58 PM
 
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I believe it's tradition out of respect to the families of the suicide. It's a pretty tough thing to have to go through.
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:00 PM
 
Location: Sango, TN
22,628 posts, read 9,611,793 times
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I don't know many families who want "committed suicide" in the obits.

However, if the family wants it included, I see no reason why not.
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:02 PM
 
Location: Memphis, Tn ~ U.S.A.
1,256 posts, read 2,164,122 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tijlover View Post
I've had a fascination with reading Obituary columns all my life. And only once have I ever read an Obituary, of a young teenager, where the parents
admitted to the fact he took his own life.

You know full well the Obituary columns are sprinkled with Suicides every day of the year, but why is it so offensive to list Suicide as the cause of death?

I know, for a fact, at the end of my life, if I'm physically capable, I'm going to end my own life and I want my Obituary to state the cause of my death, and the reasons behind it, for the whole world to see.

Perhaps the reason it's not listed as a cause of death, is it might give others the courage to do likewise.

What are your opinions? It should be left out or included in an Obituary?

You sound like a very selfish and bitter person. I would change your ways or no one will even read your obit.
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn
40,060 posts, read 18,444,154 times
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Isn't it also because suicide is considered to be illegal? (That always fascinated me. It's illegal to kill yourself...so what are they going to do, put your coffin in jail after you're dead?)
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:14 PM
 
Location: where the moss is taking over the villages
2,161 posts, read 2,974,649 times
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Why : because of the trauma involved. My husband took his own life & there were many I couldn't come right out & say the truth to. And for MOST who wanted to KNOW how he died: just curiousity on their part. MORBID CURIOUSITY, usually. If you say "suicide" then the person wants to know exactly HOW & WHY: jeez. It isn't a pleasant STORY. It's traumatic. When it's just happened, there's no reason to RE-VISIT the trauma. The survivors don't need the armchair opinion of anyone else. There's a lot of judgemental criticism for free...

I try to NEVER ask how someone died. I ask how the person who has survived the experience is doing.

Of course there is death "with dignity" & that is what should be "available"...That's an entirely different "story"...

I don't think it's always the case that the death is suicide because it isn't "stated"... sometimes I think someone is transcribing information & that's simply what the transcriber inputs...Rude, in my opinion.

Suicide survivors (the people left behind) are exhausted by the experience. It's a nightmare.

Bea Arthur helped her mother end her life. It may well be that Bea also made the same choice.

Kate

Last edited by sarahkate_m; 10-15-2009 at 05:28 PM..
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:30 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,917 posts, read 10,930,535 times
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tijlover wrote:
Quote:
I've had a fascination with reading Obituary columns all my life.
That's a scary comment right there. By the way what is a tij and why do you love them?
Anyway, back to the topic. I think the obituaries want to present a certain amount of dignity about the life of a human being and it's become a common practice to show a certain amount of respect for someone who has died and of course the family members and what they're going through need to be considered. I know a guy in Montana who died in February of acute alcohol poisoning when his liver and kidneys shut down at the same time. The obituary said the death was of natural causes and didn't elaborate any further.
I look at it this way. Do we want the obituaries to turn into a source of entertainment for those who have the mentality of the National Enquirer? I know I don't.
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Old 10-15-2009, 06:22 PM
 
6,745 posts, read 5,161,891 times
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Why the heck would a family want to read the word "suicide" in their loved ones obit? Silly question...
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Old 10-15-2009, 07:10 PM
 
Location: California
24,438 posts, read 14,808,784 times
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You wouldn't know it if they were. Not all obit's list cause of death. It's entirely up to the family to give reasons.
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Old 10-15-2009, 08:28 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
10,894 posts, read 8,618,470 times
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Default Many different ways to commit suicide

Quote:
Originally Posted by ozzie679 View Post
Why the heck would a family want to read the word "suicide" in their loved ones obit? Silly question...
There are there any number of slow suicides: alcoholism, drug addiction, and workaholism, and will we ever know the subconcious death wishes of those involved in high-speed accidents?

The workaholic who slowly kills himself, oftentimes receives a long obituary about all his great workaholic feats over the years. And I've known any number of knock-down-drag-out workaholics who went to an early, suicidal grave. Cause of death: natural causes. Oh please!

Here, in Las Vegas, I was shocked at the high number of teen suicides here.
And when I look at the Obit column and see teenage obit's, how can one not wonder if they're part of those statistics. Very easy to lump them all together.

I also study astrology, and I find it interesting to do an astrological profile of the deceased, as a learning tool, particularly the ones with longer obituaries.
To see how they measured up.

Fascination with Obituary columns being sick? As they say in the Far East, every day you don't contemplate your own death is a totally wasted day.
Obituary columns provide me some great contemplations. When I see someone having died a few months away from their first retirement check, I'm every so greatful I have lived the life I have, and such a "rich" life, and I can only hope these particular people were ready to die and had worked hard to have a happy death. A very happy death I will have, whether I die tomorrow or the next day. Ready to go.

A 23-year-old soccer player in England was left paralyzed after a sports incident. Without mobility he didn't want to live any longer. Accompanied by his supportive parents, they all flew to that suicide clinic they recently opened in Switzerland, where you don't have to be terminally ill to qualify.
A dignified suicide. And older couple that was recently in the news from England, also used the services of this clinic.

If nothing else, for the terminally ill, to provide obit's with those committing suicide in a dignified manner, would help others to gain the courage to do it as well.

As far as teen suicides, I'll backtrack on that one, even though it's probably unlikely you see teenagers reading the obituary columns.
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