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Unread 02-01-2010, 02:18 PM
 
9 posts, read 33,165 times
Reputation: 38
Default How to pray to Satan

I would be willing to put in a good word with the Lord for you. Your prayer and mine will be immeadiately answered, providing your prayer is something you need, such as tranquility, clarity, even the political demise of your enemies. I will pray to the Lord Satan for your personal satisfaction in any matter. Praise Hail Satan!

A prayer to Satan might go like this, (While standing errect arms opened)
"True Lord of this world I pray to thee grant me the wisdom to seize the oppurtunities that abound in my life, help me succeed in all my endeavors and remove and reservation in myself or others, to you I ask your humble faithful servant. Praise Satan!"

I do not affiliate with any church and have my own personal relationship with our Lord Satan, he has granted me my hearts desire with no repurcussions what so ever, it is a mistake to believe that Satan is evil, God is more evil than Satan, and many evil things have been done in the name of God. Satan wants us all to live a long and seasoned life, he only wants followers to defeat Gods hold on his thrown, if someone stole your kingdom you would raise an army to get it back right.

Those who have read the bible know the only power on earth comes from Satan thats because this is his world, God cannot answer your prayers he can only steal you away from this life and give you a life in his kingdom after you die, the kingdom he stole from Satan the kingdom we will get back for our Lord.The God and his foolowers will be the ones cast out! Praise Hail Satan the most high!

Last edited by SatansGeneral; 02-01-2010 at 02:19 PM.. Reason: grammer

 
Unread 02-01-2010, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,917 posts, read 10,537,203 times
Reputation: 5282
General, I have a question for you. Did you start off as a low ranking officer and work your way up the chain of command or were you appointed as a general by satan himself? Also, do you know if satan has any other generals besides yourself or for that matter any other officers or even enlisted soldiers?
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:03 PM
 
Location: Incognito
6,988 posts, read 11,706,911 times
Reputation: 5237
Who heads Satan's Navy? SatansAdmiral?
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:04 PM
 
Location: San Diego North County
4,805 posts, read 4,939,987 times
Reputation: 2957
I almost fell out of my chair......
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Sinking in the Great Salt Lake
11,000 posts, read 8,187,088 times
Reputation: 9645
Personally, if I was gonna worship an evil deity I would choose Loki.


Satan is too... Christian for my tastes.
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:37 PM
 
Location: Space Coast
1,949 posts, read 2,123,874 times
Reputation: 2543
I must have been reading too fast because when I first saw the title I thought it said santa instead of satan. Anyway, it's kind of hard for me to pray to any concept spawned from the bible. It seems like merely some form of rebellion against religion.
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:41 PM
 
49 posts, read 54,649 times
Reputation: 20
Oh Shucks, I hit the floor and yelled" what!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kele View Post
I almost fell out of my chair......
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 03:42 PM
 
5,881 posts, read 2,164,103 times
Reputation: 4474
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eresh View Post
I must have been reading too fast because when I first saw the title I thought it said santa instead of satan. Anyway, it's kind of hard for me to pray to any concept spawned from the bible. It seems like merely some form of rebellion against religion.
IMO, 'satanism' is merely another form of christianity. But you are correct in your assertion regarding rebellion...in this case, it is usually a rebellion against the Catholic Church and its rituals.
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 04:51 PM
 
Location: Blankity-blank!
11,442 posts, read 8,071,332 times
Reputation: 6644
Christians become awfully anxious (and highly irritated) whenever someone praises Satan, even more if anyone prays to Satan. Between god, Jesus, and Satan, apparently Satan is the most active. The former two have long since either retired, died, or no longer care about anything, much less about what is happening on our planet.
May Satan grant me my wishes!
 
Unread 02-01-2010, 04:59 PM
 
Location: Blankity-blank!
11,442 posts, read 8,071,332 times
Reputation: 6644
Anyone interested in the 9 points?

Official Church of Satan Website (http://www.churchofsatan.com/home.html - broken link)

Indulge, enjoy, and be alive...instead of pipe dreams.
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