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Old 03-06-2010, 10:58 AM
 
Location: just here
1,773 posts, read 963,121 times
Reputation: 438

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I'm sorry to hear that liberalvoice. Even though it's expected it's still a hard thing to go through. I'm thinking about you.
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Old 03-06-2010, 10:58 AM
 
458 posts, read 648,261 times
Reputation: 232
TLV
I think if your grandpa knew what you were doing he would smile with eyes filled with love. Its a respectful send off and I wish him a peaceful passing and I wish that his last thoughts are of the love you are showing.
IMO this is the perfect place to post.
Three cheers to The Liberal Voice's grandpa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YEAH GRANDPA!!!
YEAH GRANDPA!!!
YEAH GRANDPA!!!

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Old 03-06-2010, 11:11 AM
 
Location: Mississippi
6,715 posts, read 12,049,275 times
Reputation: 4273
I was living overseas when my grandfather passed away from lung cancer. I had no idea he was sick. I had no idea that he had even died. I just so happened to call home to talk to my parents and see how everything was going and my sister answered the phone - which was odd. I asked how she was doing and she said "Not good. Grandpa died the other day. Mom and Dad went to the funeral. They'll be back the day after tomorrow."

Now, my grandfather and I were very close at times. I look very much like him. We thought alike and he always managed to keep my interest in science, learning, and getting a grasp on complex ideas. I have to admit, I was very hurt, shocked, and pretty angry that I wasn't even given a phone call.

Like I said, I had no idea he was even sick. My parents figured that since I was in Tokyo it would be virtually impossible for me to get back in time for the funeral. While that was true, I still never feel like I received any sort of closure over the issue and I still feel angry at my parents for not even letting me know.

Anyway, I guess my point is that you should be thankful for the remaining time you have left with your grandfather. Cherish these last few moments in whatever way you can and think of the good times you spent with him. I have almost entirely fond memories of my grandparents when I look back on it. No matter what happens over the course of the next few days, weeks or perhaps even months, use this as an opportunity to say goodbye and be forever thankful that you have that opportunity. I missed out on mine.

Best Wishes!
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Old 03-06-2010, 11:53 AM
 
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,916 posts, read 16,416,370 times
Reputation: 5442
I also agree that the family members have made the best choice but I can understand your sadness. When my Father died of cancer it happened very quickly and while I felt terrible about the loss I was also relieved that his suffering wasn't for such a long period of time like your Grandfather has endured. I would just try to remember him when he was healthy and cherish the good memories you have of him.
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Old 03-06-2010, 12:39 PM
 
Location: Log home in the Appalachians
10,494 posts, read 10,079,893 times
Reputation: 6838
Quote:
Originally Posted by Theliberalvoice View Post
Sorry if this is the wrong place to post this but I was wondering. I have never had a family member die before so this is my first. I am taking it fairly well though since I have seen my grandfather suffer for a long time. I am not sure if it will hit me even more when he does pass away.

First he lost his ability to remember things. Then went his legs (he forgot how to use them), then he lost his arms, control of his digestive system, and then his vocal chords, then he forgot how to eat and now he is hardly breathing on his own. All in a long painful two years....

On New Years Day, he was sent to the hospital for not eating or swallowing properly. They called yesterday and said he was back in there because he was still not eating and now he was hardly breathing. Today, my uncle (who is my grandfathers legal guardian) called and said that the doctor told us there is nothing we can do as of right now and that on Monday, he will be removing all IV's and fluids that have been keeping my grandfather stable. My uncle agreed to it and it is sad. Without the fluids and stabilization, they predict he will pass on Thursday or so.

Does anyone think this is controversial or is this ok considering how bad of a condition my grandfather is?

If you are wondering about my or my families condition, we are sad but not upset if that makes sense. We knew it was coming and we agree that this is probably the best way to go. My grandpa is my dads dad so he is more upset.

Even though I am an atheist, I know my grandfather kept God close to him. So if anyone does wish to pray for him to peacefully pass over, I would be grateful. Even though, I do not believe....It is the least I can ask for him in his last couple of days on this Earth. As for atheists, just send me some love and well wishes.

Keep the memory of him in your heart and mind and he will be with you forever. When he passes over take a moment of silence and remember all the good things and good times that you had with him.

I offer my condolences to you and know that his spirit will be free. osay
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Old 03-06-2010, 02:28 PM
 
Location: Houston
3,567 posts, read 3,827,516 times
Reputation: 931
Damn, I am sorry to hear this!!!!!
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Old 03-06-2010, 02:35 PM
 
Location: An absurd world.
5,165 posts, read 8,087,036 times
Reputation: 2007
Quote:
Originally Posted by Theliberalvoice View Post
Sorry if this is the wrong place to post this but I was wondering. I have never had a family member die before so this is my first. I am taking it fairly well though since I have seen my grandfather suffer for a long time. I am not sure if it will hit me even more when he does pass away.

First he lost his ability to remember things. Then went his legs (he forgot how to use them), then he lost his arms, control of his digestive system, and then his vocal chords, then he forgot how to eat and now he is hardly breathing on his own. All in a long painful two years....

On New Years Day, he was sent to the hospital for not eating or swallowing properly. They called yesterday and said he was back in there because he was still not eating and now he was hardly breathing. Today, my uncle (who is my grandfathers legal guardian) called and said that the doctor told us there is nothing we can do as of right now and that on Monday, he will be removing all IV's and fluids that have been keeping my grandfather stable. My uncle agreed to it and it is sad. Without the fluids and stabilization, they predict he will pass on Thursday or so.

Does anyone think this is controversial or is this ok considering how bad of a condition my grandfather is?

If you are wondering about my or my families condition, we are sad but not upset if that makes sense. We knew it was coming and we agree that this is probably the best way to go. My grandpa is my dads dad so he is more upset.

Even though I am an atheist, I know my grandfather kept God close to him. So if anyone does wish to pray for him to peacefully pass over, I would be grateful. Even though, I do not believe....It is the least I can ask for him in his last couple of days on this Earth. As for atheists, just send me some love and well wishes.
I believe the right choice was made. It's similar to what happened with my dad. He could've lived longer, but he was worried about his quality of life, and rightfully so.
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Old 03-08-2010, 03:10 AM
 
8,743 posts, read 10,008,986 times
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Thank you all so much for posting. It means so much for me to log in and see all these lovely posts and wishes.

I went to see him in Canada Saturday and just came back Sunday night. I have so much I want to write but I dont think I can do it right now...but I will and post it here. Basically on Saturday, he was *in there* if you know what I mean. He responded by squeezing our hands and looking at us. He has grown so weak that he cannot close his eyes to sleep. He sleeps with them open. I went to my cousins house Saturday night and went to see him Sunday morning and oh my goodness. I could not BELIEVE how much he changed in one night. He is slipping in and out of a coma. His mouth is open and his eyes are rolled up to his skull.

His heart is still beating strong (70 per minute) BUT his blood pressure is low. As a result of this, oxygen is not getting to his body and so he is breathing extra hard (above what is normal) to try to get more in his body but to top it off, he has pneumonia.

When we left to come back to the USA, I was so heartbroken to leave him. The nurse says his body is slowly shutting off.

Grandpa, your suffering will end soon....

Thank you all so much....it means so much. The ONLY thing I want...is for him to peacefully and painlessly pass over. That is all. Please keep him in your thoughts.
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Old 03-10-2010, 09:50 PM
 
8,743 posts, read 10,008,986 times
Reputation: 3384
Doctors say he has 4-20 hours left...
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Old 03-10-2010, 10:18 PM
 
9 posts, read 7,723 times
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i remember when i lost my grand mother, she was more like a mother to me. She dies of cancer so it was pretty damned slow. i dont wanna talk about it too much but the end sounds a lot like my grandmother. When you get eh call it wont be too bad. The funeral and seeing the body may be tough... it was for me.

Be strong your family made the best decision
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