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I hate to talk about someone that way but my father and I are at our wits end. My brother (who lives with my mother) convinced our father (who I live with) to let his friend (we'll call 'Sarah') move in with us, after my mother said 'no' to Sarah staying with them. Supposedly she had recently lost her apartment and job, and was trying to get back on her feet to get custody of her daughter. She was only going to be staying until March.
Well, look at what month it is. And she is not gone. She does not pay my father money to stay here and does not help clean. She does have a job and has enough to pay her cell phone bill and buy cigarettes and makeup. When she first moved in she would leave the TV on all night and have the heat constantly cranked up to 80 degrees until my father finally told her to stop doing those things.
He complains about her every single day (when she's gone) but won't say anything to her because he's afraid that she's crazy and will try to do something to get back at him if he tries kicking her out. Now my neighbor (we live in an apartment building) is complaining because she is taking up a parking spot in front of his side of the garage. Still my dad REFUSES to tell her to leave.
I don't know what to do but I know that I'm tired of buying food that gets eaten up by someone who never contributes, and I'm sick of seeing my dad so angry and frustrated all the time. It's not fair to him. He was unemployed for over a year and finally got 2 jobs, now he's working 50+ hours per week and he's almost 60 years old! I help out financially but my dad is very stubborn and refuses to ask Sarah for help. It's not fair and I want to put an end to it, but it's not really my place to say anything since it is my father's apartment.
Can anyone offer advice? I know we should not get the police involved because doing so would make it so that we have to go to court and she could stay here until that's resolved - did I understand that correctly? I've offered to buy new locks and change them while she's at work (she has a key to our apartment), my mother has offered to call my father's landline and leave a voicemail pretending to be his landlord saying that she needs to leave because it's violating the lease...but my father doesn't want to take action for whatever reason. I'm really going crazy trying to find a solution to this but I'm coming up with nothing I just don't want to keep picking up her slack financially and with cleaning duties. And I am all about charity and helping people in need but clearly this has gone WAY past that. We never even KNEW this person before she moved in! Please help
I hate to talk about someone that way but my father and I are at our wits end. My brother (who lives with my mother) convinced our father (who I live with) to let his friend (we'll call 'Sarah') move in with us, after my mother said 'no' to Sarah staying with them. Supposedly she had recently lost her apartment and job, and was trying to get back on her feet to get custody of her daughter. She was only going to be staying until March.
Well, look at what month it is. And she is not gone. She does not pay my father money to stay here and does not help clean. She does have a job and has enough to pay her cell phone bill and buy cigarettes and makeup. When she first moved in she would leave the TV on all night and have the heat constantly cranked up to 80 degrees until my father finally told her to stop doing those things.
He complains about her every single day (when she's gone) but won't say anything to her because he's afraid that she's crazy and will try to do something to get back at him if he tries kicking her out. Now my neighbor (we live in an apartment building) is complaining because she is taking up a parking spot in front of his side of the garage. Still my dad REFUSES to tell her to leave.
I don't know what to do but I know that I'm tired of buying food that gets eaten up by someone who never contributes, and I'm sick of seeing my dad so angry and frustrated all the time. It's not fair to him. He was unemployed for over a year and finally got 2 jobs, now he's working 50+ hours per week and he's almost 60 years old! I help out financially but my dad is very stubborn and refuses to ask Sarah for help. It's not fair and I want to put an end to it, but it's not really my place to say anything since it is my father's apartment.
Can anyone offer advice? I know we should not get the police involved because doing so would make it so that we have to go to court and she could stay here until that's resolved - did I understand that correctly? I've offered to buy new locks and change them while she's at work (she has a key to our apartment), my mother has offered to call my father's landline and leave a voicemail pretending to be his landlord saying that she needs to leave because it's violating the lease...but my father doesn't want to take action for whatever reason. I'm really going crazy trying to find a solution to this but I'm coming up with nothing I just don't want to keep picking up her slack financially and with cleaning duties. And I am all about charity and helping people in need but clearly this has gone WAY past that. We never even KNEW this person before she moved in! Please help
You need to check the laws in your state because you may not be able to change the locks without evicting her because you allowed her to stay there.
What I would do is start charging her for everything and hound the crap out of her. She will either pay up or move out if she doesn't want to put up with it.
I've helped people out in the past but will never do it again because I find that they will take advantage of you and you have to kick them out.
On the other hand, maybe dad LIKES her. Maybe you and your bro should move out and let dad have the little lady in his life.
Lol you may be right, I think that my dad does have a crush on her. But she is 27 and has a boyfriend, he is 57 or 58 years old. He hits on her sometimes but she just brushes it off. When my brother mentioned something going on between them (our dad wasn't there) she made a gagging motion and started laughing saying 'no way'. But he complains about her so often I really don't know what to think. I'm 7 years younger than her and paying to support her, that's not fair :/ I wouldn't care if they did have something going on but if that was the case wouldn't she be chipping in? Or wouldn't he be paying for her without complaint?
Anyway, my brother does not live with us, he lives with my mother in a house.
You need to check the laws in your state because you may not be able to change the locks without evicting her because you allowed her to stay there.
What I would do is start charging her for everything and hound the crap out of her. She will either pay up or move out if she doesn't want to put up with it.
I've helped people out in the past but will never do it again because I find that they will take advantage of you and you have to kick them out.
busta
biusta
Oh, I did not know that. Thank you for the tip, I'll see what I can find about the laws here.
My dad has tried asking her for money but she says she doesn't have any or she doesn't get paid til the end of the week. Then when the end of the week comes, she says she forgot about it. He has told me this himself, over and over again.
You aren't kidding, we thought we were helping someone who was down on her luck but now I see that was a big mistake.
Lol you may be right, I think that my dad does have a crush on her. But she is 27 and has a boyfriend, he is 57 or 58 years old. He hits on her sometimes but she just brushes it off. When my brother mentioned something going on between them (our dad wasn't there) she made a gagging motion and started laughing saying 'no way'. But he complains about her so often I really don't know what to think. I'm 7 years younger than her and paying to support her, that's not fair :/ I wouldn't care if they did have something going on but if that was the case wouldn't she be chipping in? Or wouldn't he be paying for her without complaint?
Anyway, my brother does not live with us, he lives with my mother in a house.
Remember the little boys on the playground when you were in kindergarten? They would pull a girl's pigtails and say they hate her, but they secretly had a crush on her. I think dad's just trying to throw off suspicion. After all, what 57 year old guy doesn't want a 27 year old???
Remember the little boys on the playground when you were in kindergarten? They would pull a girl's pigtails and say they hate her, but they secretly had a crush on her. I think dad's just trying to throw off suspicion. After all, what 57 year old guy doesn't want a 27 year old???
But what 27 year old wants a 57 year old? Lol and she has a boyfriend. Isn't that kind of weird?
PM me, for a small fee I can make this problem go away.
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I just don't want to keep picking up her slack financially and with cleaning duties. And I am all about charity and helping people in need but clearly this has gone WAY past that. We never even KNEW this person before she moved in! Please help 
I think dad's just trying to throw off suspicion. After all, what 57 year old guy doesn't want a 27 year old??? 
